Bro I just really wanna see a scene with Tikki, Plagg, and Master Fu sitting around eating cheese and macarons and complaining about how thick Adrien and Marinette are like
Plagg: ahhh! I can’t stand it anymore! Adr — *burps* — I mean, Chat Noir doesn’t even realize that the girl he’s constantly moony eyed over is the same one that sits behind him in class! And I have to hear about it ALL the time. “Ladybug is AMAZING. Someday Ladybug will love me. If only Ladybug would give me a chance!” Sometimes I just want to scream, “OPEN YOUR EYES! SHE’S RIGHT THERE!” [swallows an entire block of cheese] I love the kid even more than camembert, but he’s got to be the most boneheaded miraculous owner I’ve ever had.
Tikki: My owner is very smart! She just ... can’t realize this one very obvious thing. I don’t understand how she doesn’t see it.
Fu: I suppose that people see only what they wish to see. [sips tea]
Plagg; Yeah, but wouldn’t they *want* to see this? I mean, they’re head over heels for each other and they don’t even know it.
Tikki: My owner has photos of Adrien all over her room, and she sees Chat Noir almost every day! I thought she would put the two together by now. She’s usually very good at figuring things out.
Plagg: At least Chat Noir looks kind of different when he’s transformed. Ladybug looks exactly the same, except with a mask.
Tikki: I know. But it’s a good thing that their identities are still a secret.
Plagg: I guess it’s lucky for us that those two are so blind, then.
Tikki: What do you mean, Master?
Fu: I chose to entrust the miraculous with Adrien and Marinette for two reasons. One, they showed compassion to a stranger in need — just as a true hero should. And two ... [sips tea] ... they are both very dumb.
Fu: As long as Adrien and Marinette remain ignorant, they remain safe. For that, we can be grateful.
Plagg: ... it’s still super annoying, though.
Fu: Indeed. Hella annoying.
Tikki: I know their identities must remain a secret, but oh! I do hope they realize someday that their feelings are mutual! They’re made for each other. I’ve always thought so.
Plagg: Couldn’t we at least nudge my owner in Marinette’s direction? I mean, he makes me wanna barf when he gets sappy so I can’t even imagine how horrible it would be if he actually had a girlfriend, but ... even I know that this “just a friend” stuff is nonsense. He’s got a thing for Marinette.
Tikki: And maybe if Adrien fell in love with Marinette, he would get over Ladybug, and they would work even better together as partners! Master Fu, can we count on your help to bring our owners together?
Fu: Actually, I’m a Lukanette shipper.
Plagg: What? No way! That’s too much blue hair for one relationship.
Fu: I’m also a Plikki shipper.
Plagg: Plik ... ? OHH. [scoots closer to Tikki] Hey, sugar cube, wanna give ME some sugar?
Tikki: [sighs] Now I know how Ladybug feels.
Plagg: Hey Adrien, Master Fu said you were dumb! Hahahahahahahahahahaha. Also, Tikki’s my girlfriend now.