Angel of Darkness

I may come off as an angel, but mess with me and you will think you’re messing with the darkness! FC: Demi Lovato

[missxdesiree]

Worst Enemies: Substance Abuse & Ex-Best Friend

My worst enemies go hand in hand, it has to do with a so called best friend I had growing up who was addicted to drugs and alcohol and got me doing things I shouldn’t have. There have been times when I thought I was okay but I wasn’t because being friends with someone like this was toxic to my life, health and effected a lot of people who loved and cared for me.

1. “Sober” - Demi Lovato

2. “Confident” - Demi Lovato

3. “Breaking The Habit” - Linkin Park

4. “Paranoid” - Linkin Park

5.  "Back to Back" - Drake

6. “Bad Blood” - Taylor Swift

7. “Dark Times” - The Weeknd

8. “It Ain’t Me” - Kygo & Selena Gomez

9. “The A Team” - Ed Sheeran

10. “Amazing” by Aerosmith

[heyitscandix]

missxdesiree‌:

Aren’t you and I like the same age? Haha. Little girl. You really are something Candi. Really are. You always are one to bring up past before. So shut up. You don’t even know anything outside of my life, try living in the life I am! It’s great how you can go through something and it never gets brought up. It’s because you think people are scared of you. Maybe because you always have a damn team behind you. How about doing things by yourself and not always with your best friends and boyfriend, oh I’m sorry fiancé because he finally thinks your good enough to be a wife. Like this will actually last, HA okay!

We may be the same age, but I’m clearly more mature than you are. Again, no one has said anything about your past, so I’m not sure what you’re on about. You punched a wall, I said you had anger issues. Which you clearly do, since you nearly broke your hand over losing a match. I haven’t always had a team behind me, try again. And you could have a team behind you if people actually trusted you. I became and retained championships, alone. What have you done? You wanna question my relationship? That’s rich. How long have you and Jeff been on and off dating????

[missxdesiree]

Ooooh burn! You got me Candi. Totally got me there. You’re a joke Candi, a serious joke.

[heyitscandix]

missxdesiree‌:

A bitch should really just mind her own damn business Candi. You don’t know what the fuck I have been through. Go ahead talk about my past! That’s all your good at doing is bring up bullshit from the past or talking about others issues!

Nobody said anything about your past, little girl. You’re the one who brings it up. Not my fault that even your best friend thinks you’ve lost your mind.

[missxdesiree]

Aren’t you and I like the same age? Haha. Little girl. You really are something Candi. Really are. You always are one to bring up past before. So shut up. You don’t even know anything outside of my life, try living in the life I am! It’s great how you can go through something and it never gets brought up. It’s because you think people are scared of you. Maybe because you always have a damn team behind you. How about doing things by yourself and not always with your best friends and boyfriend, oh I’m sorry fiancé because he finally thinks your good enough to be a wife. Like this will actually last, HA okay!

[heyitscandix]

Bitch has got some serious anger issues.

[missxdesiree]

A bitch should really just mind her own damn business Candi. You don’t know what the fuck I have been through. Go ahead talk about my past! That’s all your good at doing is bring up bullshit from the past or talking about others issues!

[missxdesiree]

Me Against The World || Self-Para

“How can you let this get so bad? Why didn’t you tell me?” Desiree said through the phone. “I understand that but Deena and I did everything we could to help you but I had to also do the most here!” She said moments later. “Mom, I’m sorry okay but this is stressful enough. We can’t keep living like this!” She said as she bit her lip listening to her mother speak. “Okay, okay. We will figure it out!” She said softly. “Yes, mom. It’s you and me against the world. I know.” Desiree wiped her tears away. “I love you too Mommy. I’ll call you later.” She said softly as she hung up.

Desiree laid back on the hotel bed as she bit her lip. She played with her finger nails and she just thought for a moment. Desiree’s house was on foreclosure, while she knew she would be okay. She knew her mother would not be. Thankfully she had amazing friends, like Erica who would take her family in because she was always there for them. Erica and her family, were like family. Which Desiree was always so thankful for. No matter what the girls been through, even in a fight or a disagreement they were always there for one another.

Desiree has been going through a lot, everyone was always so worried about her. She had issues with substance abuse and had even been checked into hospitals for issues with her health and over doses. She constantly had people checking on her so she didn’t relapse. Desiree took out her journal and started writing in it. She started expressing herself through writing to be able to have a way of coping and not go back to old ways. She found herself crying writing because all her emotions were being poured out right now. But it was helping. Her mother and her always said it was them against the world but right now, it felt like it was Desiree against the world, or as she said me against the world.

[missxdesiree]

Getting back to the groove of things. I’m sorry for my absence. As many as you all know, I moved in October, I had also lost someone very important to me in that process. I had been dealing with a lot. Desiree storyline outside of the ring will be a lot of what I’m going through in real life.

I have to move once again, this is the 8th move for me in 9 years. My roommates and I got screwed over, so I’m just dealing with a lot. Thank god, I do have somewhere to go but please just bare with me as I will be moving within the next two weeks again, then in a few months. I will be doing my 9th move in 9 years. It’s really frustrating to say the least. I haven’t been open about anything because I just needed time to myself.

I am doing my best to get back to the swing of things. I want to work with new people, so all my girls need storylines inside the ring. Let’s talk and make things happen. Only thing I do ask is - I will need people to write matches, in return for writing the matches, I can write promos for you with Renee or with the muse you choose to pick to work with.

Thank you DeAnna for being understanding toward me and everyone who I have been working with for helping me and understanding my hard time. To everyone who also have been dealing with my negativity and my anger issues. Lol. I’m sorry if I had been rude or distant. I just don’t know how to cope sometimes. I do love you all dearly.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

Desiree shook her head, “I’ve been scared to, been avoiding him and I feel horrible about it but I just.. I don’t want to worry him. I didn’t wanna worry anyone. Plus I didn’t want him to think I was gonna go down that path because every time something goes wrong, everyone thinks I’m gonna go back on the deep end and I haven’t!” She said softly. “I only have smoked.. which is why I have been avoiding work too because I don’t want them finding that in my system. But it’s the only thing that keeps me sane!” She said softly as she hung her head down in shame.

Erica sighed and shook her head, looking at Desiree. “Desi, you have to tell him. He deserves to know. You’re supposed to be a couple.” She closed her eyes at the mention of smoking and she took a deep breath. “Well you need to stop smoking. I don’t know if they’re going to test us before the pay-per-view, but you’ve got to stop. You don’t want to throw your dream away over that do you?”

[missxdesiree]

Desiree bit her lip and nodded. “I know. I know. I’m just scared and I don’t want to lose everything. I just need a distraction I guess. I need better character development.. I lost all that.” She said softly.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

“I’ll have to ask her, her hands don’t work like how they used too. She’s gotten so much worse..” She bit her lip but nodded. “I love you bean.” She said softly. “I should of came out about everything sooner, but I was scared..” She said softly.

“I love you too.” Erica wiped Desiree’s cheeks again now that Desiree had stopped balling and she squeezed her hand three more times. “I know you were. But you can’t do everything alone. No one can.” She gave her a small smile. “Have you told Jeff?”

[missxdesiree]

Desiree shook her head, “I’ve been scared to, been avoiding him and I feel horrible about it but I just.. I don’t want to worry him. I didn’t wanna worry anyone. Plus I didn’t want him to think I was gonna go down that path because every time something goes wrong, everyone thinks I’m gonna go back on the deep end and I haven’t!” She said softly. “I only have smoked.. which is why I have been avoiding work too because I don’t want them finding that in my system. But it’s the only thing that keeps me sane!” She said softly as she hung her head down in shame.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

Desiree nodded her head as she hiccuped back the tears, she squeezed Erica tight as she bit her lip. She rested her head on her shoulder as she tried calming down. Desiree wasn’t one to ever show this much emotion to just anyone but Erica was someone who she knew could always making her feel better. “I’m sorry..” She said mumbling.

Erica closed her eyes as she listened to Desiree continue to try and calm down. “I forgive you.” She whispered and rubbed the other’s back some more before pulling back a bit and smiling. “And I have a job for your mom. If she wants it anyway.” The brunette had started out in the business with the black-haired girl and her mom had always made both of their gear. “She can make my gear again if she’s interested. Her stuff is better than what we have now.”

[missxdesiree]

“I’ll have to ask her, her hands don’t work like how they used too. She’s gotten so much worse..” She bit her lip but nodded. “I love you bean.” She said softly. “I should of came out about everything sooner, but I was scared..” She said softly.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

Desiree bit her lip. “I just always thought I had it under control. I-I..” Desiree started crying as she leaned up against her best friend and cried into her arms. Desiree was upset still but she was appreciating that Erica was always there and was helping her and her family. Erica was always like family to her anyways, but she knew that her mom and sister would appreciate her more than she knows. Desiree continued to cry not being able to control her emotions right now. She was stressed and scared because she didn’t know what to expect and didn’t want anyone’s judgement about her.

Erica wrapped her arms around Desiree, holding her against her, not even caring about all the tears and snot that was most likely on her shirt at this point. She rubbed the other’s back, humming a soothing tune to try and calm the other down the best she could. The brunette squeezed the black-haired woman comfortingly and ran her fingers through the black hair. “It’s all going to be fine. And if you need to work more, all you have to do is tell Stephanie and Hunter. Or if you can’t work right now, I’ve got plenty of money I can loan you and you just pay me back whenever you can, no interest or anything.”

[missxdesiree]

Desiree nodded her head as she hiccuped back the tears, she squeezed Erica tight as she bit her lip. She rested her head on her shoulder as she tried calming down. Desiree wasn’t one to ever show this much emotion to just anyone but Erica was someone who she knew could always making her feel better. “I’m sorry..” She said mumbling.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

“We have to be out of the house, everyone out, everything out by the end of February. I don’t know where to even start with how much we need!” She said bitting her lip. “It’s not myself, I’m worried about. I’ll figure it out. It’s mommy, Deena and the girls!” She said crying. Desiree knew that Erica was someone who would always be there. Desiree was stubborn and didn’t want to tell anyone anything out of pride but this time she knew she was in trouble. She just didn’t wanna be a hassle or intrude in anyones life.

“Okay, breathe, Desi. Just breathe. I can help. I will help. You don’t need to freak out.” Erica wiped the tears off of Desiree’s cheeks and held her face so Desiree had to look at her. “I’m sure you can move in with Jeff. I’m not sure why you haven’t before now anyways. But as for your mom, Deena and the girls, why don’t they just move into my old house? It’s paid off, my name is still on the deed, it’s got furniture in it, and I’m obviously not using it.”

[missxdesiree]

Desiree bit her lip. “I just always thought I had it under control. I-I..” Desiree started crying as she leaned up against her best friend and cried into her arms. Desiree was upset still but she was appreciating that Erica was always there and was helping her and her family. Erica was always like family to her anyways, but she knew that her mom and sister would appreciate her more than she knows. Desiree continued to cry not being able to control her emotions right now. She was stressed and scared because she didn’t know what to expect and didn’t want anyone’s judgement about her.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

Desiree shut the door behind her as she bit her lip. She leaned up against the door, her hands up to her face as she slide down slowly crying. “Finically, we aren’t doing good. Mom lost her job, she couldn’t keep up with the bills and Deena and I tried to help her as much as we could but we failed. The house is on foreclosure and we have no where to go!” She said sobbing. “Because of all my medical stuff and bill, it’s put me in such debt and because I haven’t been at work. I-I..” she paused and just cried, her body shaking from having so much anxiety.

Erica didn’t think it was going to be this serious, that Desiree would let things get this out of hand before at least talking to her, but she had and now Erica had to figure out how to help. “We’ll talk about the fact that you let things get this out of hand without talking to me later, but right now we’re going to figure this out.” She grabbed the other’s hand and squeezed it three times, the way she always signaled that she loved someone without saying the words. “How much money do you need? And how much does your mom need?”

[missxdesiree]

“We have to be out of the house, everyone out, everything out by the end of February. I don’t know where to even start with how much we need!” She said bitting her lip. “It’s not myself, I’m worried about. I’ll figure it out. It’s mommy, Deena and the girls!” She said crying. Desiree knew that Erica was someone who would always be there. Desiree was stubborn and didn’t want to tell anyone anything out of pride but this time she knew she was in trouble. She just didn’t wanna be a hassle or intrude in anyones life.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

[itsericabitch]

missxdesiree‌:

Desiree had been distant, especially from her friends. She had so much going on, so much she was dealing with. She needed to come clean and tell Erica at least what was going on. She bit her lip nervous for her to arrive. When she heard the door. She walked over to it, sighed and opened the door. Desiree bit her lip, “I’m in trouble.. We all are!” She started saying to her friend as she fought back tears, bitting her lip hard.

Erica was mad at Desiree, that was no secret, she felt betrayed and like Desiree didn’t trust her because all Desiree had done lately was push her away, but that didn’t mean she didn’t care. She was taken aback by the other’s words and she looked at her, confusion evident on her face. “What do you mean we’re in trouble?” The brunette didn’t even wait for the black-haired woman to offer to let her come inside, gently squeezing between her and the door frame. “Talk to me, Desiree.”

[missxdesiree]

Desiree shut the door behind her as she bit her lip. She leaned up against the door, her hands up to her face as she slide down slowly crying. “Finically, we aren’t doing good. Mom lost her job, she couldn’t keep up with the bills and Deena and I tried to help her as much as we could but we failed. The house is on foreclosure and we have no where to go!” She said sobbing. “Because of all my medical stuff and bill, it’s put me in such debt and because I haven’t been at work. I-I..” she paused and just cried, her body shaking from having so much anxiety.

[itsericabitch]

Breakthrough || Erica&Desiree

Erica sighed as she slipped her jeans on followed by her flannel shirt and shoes, heading out to her car after saying goodbye to Allen and the kids. She drove over to Desiree’s still not sure exactly what Desiree could want, seeing as they hadn’t exactly been on good terms in months, but she decided she was going to give it a chance. The brunette parked, got out of the car and knocked on the door, waiting on Desiree to open the door. Once it happened her head snapped up and she gave Desiree a small smile. “Well…I’m here..” @missxdesiree

[missxdesiree]

Desiree had been distant, especially from her friends. She had so much going on, so much she was dealing with. She needed to come clean and tell Erica at least what was going on. She bit her lip nervous for her to arrive. When she heard the door. She walked over to it, sighed and opened the door. Desiree bit her lip, “I’m in trouble.. We all are!” She started saying to her friend as she fought back tears, bitting her lip hard.

[missxdesiree]

@itsericabitch, can we please talk..

[itsericabitch]

I’m listening.

[missxdesiree]

Can you come over, it’s kind of important.

[missxdesiree]

@itsericabitch, can we please talk..

[missxdesiree]

@xcharismaticenigma, can we talk?