A brief analysis of Dazai Osamu’s ever fragile will to live:
(And his partnership with Chuuya because you guys know better than to assume I’d leave that shit out.)
From what we know so far, Dazai has always felt this deep, all consuming emptiness in his soul mostly related to his ability, No Longer Human. In a way, No Longer Human, a discussion on depression and humanity, sucks genuine emotions straight out of Dazai. It makes sense. If you think of a gift as something that makes a person special, Dazai’s touch removes that from someone. That spark, which defines a person’s uniqueness, is snuffed out by Dazai’s presence. Then, to Dazai, it must feel like this black hole inside himself. He doesn’t feel like he has a spark, he feels like he lacks one so badly that it takes other people’s sparks out too. How depressing.
Dazai’s ability is pretty special though. Evidently, no one else exists with that ability, according to Randou. Considering we already know that OdaSaku’s ability was possessed by another person as well, it goes to imply that two people manifesting the same power is not super uncommon.
The physical events of this fight are pretty simple. Dazai can fuck up all of Randou’s plans by touching his ability. Chuuya needs to break through the barrier between Dazai and Randou. To prevent that from happening, Randou plans to kill Dazai using the former boss and then kill Chuuya himself.
Chuuya, like most people who knows of Dazai’s extreme suicidal tendencies, would assume Dazai was just fine with it. And with a scythe wielding zombie in there with him, Dazai is in considerable danger.
Something about this whole mission, from meeting Chuuya and the mystery of the resurrected former boss, all the way to this point, has sparked interest in Dazai. And why wouldn’t it? The tiny angry boy is a literal God in human form. Randou has crazy spirit powers that control dead people that conveniently no one knew about for years. This is not your average every day stuff. Dazai’s life has been placed on the chopping block, but Dazai even thinks to himself that Mori hadn’t done that maliciously. He likely knew of the danger and thought that for Dazai, this was something he could handle. He even sent one of the most powerful ability users alive with him to make sure he could overcome this obstacle if that was what he wanted.
And that was the kicker. If Dazai wanted to die there, if this outlandish dream type series of events wasn’t enough to make Dazai feel something, it would have all ended then and there. But, Dazai does feel something here, I think. After all, Dazai Osamu who seems to be completely uninterested in life says it best himself.
He voices his interest from a logical point of view. He’s trying to find a reason to live. He’s infatuated with death. The two are invariably connected and the Mafia has shown him the first instance he’s likely ever seen other than suicide where he can walk that knife’s edge between life and death while experiencing something new at the same time.
And what’s more? He doesn’t have to do that alone. There’s someone else around walking that line with him. So, he decides that he and his new partner should get this shit done.
And it’s enough to make me cry.
And now he’s kinda showing Chuuya his cards in a round about way. He’s not trying to find an inventive way to die. Dazai’s goal has always been to find meaning in life. That’s what he told Mori in S3E1. That’s what he told OdaSaku. And now Chuuya knows too.
And I can’t help but wonder if this is actually the first time he considers the possibility. Before the mafia, was Dazai ever actually convinced there was something out there worth witnessing? Worth living long enough to experience? Maybe that was why Mori wanted him to go on this mission, was pushing for Dazai and Chuuya’s partnership. He promised Dazai he would provide him an easy, painless way to die if he succeeded in his mission. But, succeeding to take down Randou required Dazai to decide to live. Tricky tricky. Chuuya is kinda a danger magnet. His impressive physical strength and his positively destructive ability would both always mean that Mori would put him where the chaos was. And Dazai, who wants to dip himself in chaos and mayhem to see if there’s anything to be valued in it, can bitch and moan all he wants. Chuuya’s side in those fire fights is the place he wants to be if that truly is his goal. And later, they find out that Chuuya cannot survive his corrupted state without Dazai’s support. So, their “forced” partnership is actually extremely mutually beneficial.
Later, Dazai will learn more about the importance of relationships in one’s life. Through OdaSaku and Ango, but I think also Chuuya. After all, using No Longer Human to save Chuuya’s life was probably the first time Dazai had ever used his power for someone else’s benefit. Though, who knows if he thought about it that way. Dazai’s will to live is more complicated now in the ADA, and I doubt we will fully understand his relationship with life and death in the contemporary arc until we get to the final fight with Fyodor Dostoevsky. Still, this episode gave us an interesting insight into the origins of Dazai’s thoughts on living. I’m excited to see what, if anything, we come to learn about him next.
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