⟡ drunk writing fezco fathers day fluff, life is good
⟡
M to the J, 20 she/her and they/them,
Writing for myself and black readers. Fem mostly but don't be afraid to request. Trying to stay consistent while falling down a freaky slope. Currently rewatching Criminal Minds as I finish my stripper fic. Also planning a frenimes bandmates to lovers fic.
Here is my masterlist where you can find all my works links and neatly organized 🫶🏾🩷. From chaptered and finished fics. To fluff and smut (18+ characters) oneshots, mood boards and AU’s.
Requests are ( off/ 🎟️ On ), here are the fandoms and character I write for 👩🏾💻
🚲 Stranger things
- Argyle - Eddie Munson - Mike Wheeler - Jonathan Byers - Steve Harrington - Robin Buckley -
I haven't seen season 4 in a long time, but the 6 nuggets thing is still insane to me. Him saying that to Nancy of all people while she's in a relationship. I feel like the writers really set Steve back so much. It drives me a little bit crazy. But him having four daughters that was a pretty cute idea. With season 5 coming faster than a train and the likelihood that someone on this list. Including Steve himself may be dying... here is who I think Steve would name his six kids after. Also, I am a high believer in the girl dad Steve agenda <3
Lets start with the boys...
Dustin
Lucas
To me this is very obvious. I feel like Dustin and Lucas are his favorite boys out of the whole group.
now for our girlsss <3
Robin
Max
Erica
Barb
Robin is a given. Considering her situation and how he is sort of a big brother to her, I think Max is too. Erica may seem random but, having a little Lucas and Eric would be perfect for him. As for Barb, I feel like Steve does hold some sort of inner turmoil around what happened to her at his own home. To him it would be a way to honor her.
Well October flew by fast... Anyways it's time for lil slice of pumpkin pie to shine on his bday. I wasn’t planning on doing 28 but after doing 10 I just kept going. Spencer is my husband and the father of my children, daughters specifically. I loved him for years so here is 28 reasons why.
How his hair gets curlier/ wavier over the seasons
How he badly wanted kids/how he cares about kids
His friendship with JJ
He's a major bookworm
Has glasses and doesn't wear them(same Spence)
He is sober
He plays piano and chess
How he often connects with unsubs
His complex relationship with his mom
His hatred for his dad
His relationship with Derek
His friendship with Penelope
His friendship with Emily
His hair in general
He was bullied as a kid (relatable)
He is henry's godfather/his relationship with JJ’s sons
He drinks from time to time
His relationship with elle 😭😕
He teaches/ was a teacher for a little bit
We have the same favorite color, purple
He blocked out his memories of his dad
Chocolate is his favorite flavor
He is little Hank's godfather
The way he kisses
The way he holds your face as he kisses you
He write's letters to his mom
Maeve Donovan. my sweet Angel
Derek's son's middle name is Spencer
Here’s how to celebrate for those who do 🍩
Go on a walk or on the subway
Read a book
Eat a slice of chocolate cake or a donut with chocolate icing and sprinkles
With October being here and Halloween on the way. Here is a list of the Criminal Minds Halloween episodes. These episodes are of course, mostly case focused with slivers of happiness. But truthfully I feel like they are so worth it. I have noticed the later seasons do not have Halloween specific episodes. But I mostly skimmed those, to be honest. I'm unsure if I really count S.12, EP.4 - Keeper, it came out close to Halloween but has no mention of the holiday at all.
I know I haven't been posting much of anything. But here's to an active October 🧡.
I just wanted to say happy birthday to my silver fox, sugar mama, and mother of my children. Emily Prentiss. I know that CM mixes her birthday up with Spencer's. But I do feel today is her day and her day only! So here are 12 reasons I love Em.
Her nose
Her laugh
How she cares about and wants/wanted kids
Her friendship with Spencer
Her relationship with JJ
She has a cat/is a cat mom
She was emo as a teenager, or at least had a phase
She has mommy issues
Her smile
She’s multilingual
She smokes and drinks ( crazy people are saying it's out of character for her...)
Her sexuality
Here's how to celebrate for those who do 🎊
Drink
Smoke
Be nice to a black cat
Kiss a woman
Watch criminal minds
Joking but whatever keeps me posting tbh byee. Remember that wild impression she did of Derek for Penelope. I need to start writing her seriously.
I’ve been thinking more about girl dad Spencer around halloween time. Or all hallows eve his favorite holiday. Finally having a family of his own outside of the BAU to start and share traditions with. In fact after having his daughters, Spencer only seemed to go harder on holidays. Wanting to give his three little ghouls the kind of holiday traditions that he could never have with his mother. And could never remember or imagine with his father.
Watches Halloween movies all October with you and the girls
Starts planning costumes months in advance
Scares and pranks you because it makes the girls laugh
Starts a scare and prank war in the family
Youngest daughter seems unfazed by Spencer's scares and can always tell it's him under the mask
makes part of the house haunted
spends a little too much on decorations
gives candy out to children in the apartment and on cases
loves letting his daughters do his makeup and choose costumes
Makes and loves eating orange and Halloween themed rice crispy treats
Includes family pets in on costumes
does family cosplay of favorite books, tv shows and movies
likes to dress in odd, morbid costumes with the kids
takes everyone to film festivals & theaters
always pretends to be scared when his daughters scare him
takes time to hand make outfits for accuracy, learns how to sew
Loves leaving little spooky notes, drawing, and facts in their lunch boxes
Has many creepy masks
adores when his daughters call it all hallows eve
shows you and the girls pictures of little him from past Halloweens from his mom's photo book
Dresses up as historical figures and authors with his daughters, usually it's their idea
asks you to help him make a group chat for a big BAU group costume, either superhero's, fairy tales, or as each other
Offers to babysit Sergio, so Emily can go party
Buys and tries crazy pumpkin flavored coffee and drinks with you, your daughters and Penelope
Bakes and gives out cookies and halloween treats in the office
gives out full bars of chocolate, leaves a bowl out for late treaters
commits too hard to acting like his costume character
loves teaching and playing scary piano music
Rotates trick or treating with team members and their families
Has a very large halloween themed sock and tie collecting
buys matching halloween cardigans for the family
buys excessive snacks for school/class partying
makes a small alter with Penelope for passed loved ones, pets and historical figures
adds orange and colorful braiding hair to his daughters braids, along with black and orange beads
My Spencer Reid masterlist
Girl Dad, Spencer Reid
Trick-or-treating with Girl Dad!Spencer 👑🍫
Ongoing, 22/? chapters "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader
Now, there were a few things that could make a bad breakup worse. Seeing your ex move on too quickly or finding out they weren't as loyal as you thought. But having an unsupportive friend throw “I told you so” after “I told you so” in your face had to be at the top of the list.
As if life hadn't been hard enough with you stuck in bed crying over Spencer. It seemed your best friend Sydney was doing everything in her power to make you feel worse. Whether it was going on and on about how she always knew Spencer was no good. Or how you'd prioritized him over your friendship. Worst of all, she'd question you on what you expected from a man you met in a strip club.
It was almost more exhausting than dealing with it alone. Almost. The truth was, you weren't sure if you trusted yourself alone. Though you would never tell her that. Or anyone, for that matter.
Breakups were hard, yes. But when it came to you and your rather selective dating habits. Breakups seemed to hit harder. Your heartbreaks always lead to a depressive episode that lasts longer than the relationship itself. Leaving you haunted until you were forced to move on.
It's exactly why you stayed away from relationships. It seemed every time you found yourself single and happy. A man had to come along and ruin it. Though you weren't against taking accountability, there was a common denominator. And you couldn't have been the problem every time, right?
But Spencer wasn't the problem, problem, was he ? Dilaudid was, stress was. Not him, and certainly not you. Life just got too much for him, and your relationship was caught in the crossfire. Or at least that's what you were telling yourself when you weren't over scrutinizing and rethinking everything.
While you tried to tiptoe around the details of your relationship with care. Sydney preferred a bulldozer. All in the name of helping you move on, stay grounded in, and reconnecting with reality. You had no idea she felt so strongly about him. Maybe you weren't paying enough attention to her after all.
Plus, there was the whole Lila Archer thing that Sydney was suddenly not letting you forget. You tried to remind her that it was technically before the two of you were dating. And Spencer wasted no time clearing it up, even going to lengths to fix things.
“Bitch, you're lying.” Sydney said, in pure disbelief.
“I'm serious; he even offered to call her and everything. He swore it was all media misconstruing what really happened. He saved her life at the end of the da-”
“And you believed that shit?” her speculation only heightened.
“Yea… plus I felt bad,” you admitted.
“For yourself ?” she asked quickly.
“For her,” you clarified.
“Why ?” her tone more disgusted than genuinely curious.
At first, you were upset, obviously. But with Spencer, not Lila. After seeing the magazine, your curiosity got the best of you, and you read it. Learning about what she went through from afar.
Before the Fisher King situation, you had no real idea what Spencer experienced and worked with daily. All you got was a postcard and a threatening call, Elle practically lost her life. It made you look at what happened or what may have happened differently. You knew what it was like to be scared like that. Terrified even in your own home, and to feel protected by Spencer.
“She could've died if Spencer wasn't there, her own best friend too. I don't know, I just can't justify holding that against him.”
Sydney didn't seem to care, drowning you out and focusing on the movie playing in front of her. All while hogging the popcorn bowl. Trying to take her approach, you didn't speak on or about Spencer. Though, you couldn't stop thinking about him as easily.
But watching romance movies gave Sydney plenty of conversation starters. Or more so, suggestions or rules for moving on.
“You should block him,” she says matter-of-factly. “It's the easiest way to make sure you don't do anything stupid.”
You chuckled, entertaining your friend's idea. Knowing damn well, you were far from agreeing.
“Like what?”
“Drunken 3 am call or 3 pm.”
You rarely drank, and when you did, texting wasn't your forte. Food was. That, or sex.
“If I want to text Spencer, I don't need to be drunk to do it,” you told her before eating a spoonful of ice cream.
“Do you really think he'll reply ?”
You shrugged in truth, though a small part of you knew deep down the answer was yes. Or at least you hoped it was.
“I doubt it, I mean-” she licks her spoon. “He did break up with you.”
The cool, sweet taste suddenly felt sour. When you told her about breaking up with Spencer, the detail of who did it was one you kept vague. In truth, you knew it didn't matter. But it was the circumstances behind it that you wanted to keep secret.
“Why do you say that ?” you asked genuinely.
“You aren't bragging about breaking his heart or complaining about how toxic he was.”
“Bragging. Really?”
Your somewhat confident tone is now unamused. Throwing the cover off yourself, you stood and made your way to the kitchen. Having someone over to judge your mess made it easier to try to clean. Rinsing off your bowl and spoon, you took a moment to organize them for when you had the motivation to do them.
“Nothing to say about this one, huh?” she says with a small smile as she plays with the melting chocolate. “First time for everything, I guess.”
With the breakup, you were well aware your emotions were running high. Right now, it didn't take much to trigger you. If it wasn't sadness, it was anger or, worse, depression. That agonizing numbness. And somehow Sydney was hitting all cylinders.
But you wanted to give your best friend the benefit of the doubt. She just wanted some relationship gossip. Just like anyone else. That of course, didn't necessarily mean you had to give it to her.
“Things just happen.”
Your response is boring and bland. Clearly not what she wanted. Unentertained, she finished her ice cream and met you at the sink. She drops the bowl in with yours, the sound of clashing dishes makes you jump as she walks away.
“I still think you should do it. I know you'll thank me later.”
Even with Sydney's opposing view on your relationship. It felt good to have someone familiar by your side. To watch trashy, unsophisticated movies with, not films or documentaries. To yell at the screen with and not listen to his soft voice translate the words. To fall asleep on the couch and wake up with and not alone while he's gone working on a case.
Waking up slowly, Sydney searched the dark room. Dazed, she rummaged the soft cover before panicking, not knowing where her phone was. A sigh of relief left her as she felt the familiar shape only to find it was not her phone but yours. It takes her a second to pause the reading voice, but with your phone in her hand, she can't help herself. Investigating the screen, she scoffed at the thought of you reading some article.
“y/n.” she called your name softly.
Checking to see if you were awake, she does it again before continuing on your phone. Sliding up, she doesn't waste time looking through it. Instead, Sydney finds your messages, and it doesn't take long for Spencer's contact to be found. The name “baby boy 💜📚” paired with a lowly lit picture of the two of you and no new messages made it clear you two hadn't been in contact.
Spencer was rightfully giving you space and unsure what to do, you were doing the same. The wound was still fresh, but Sydney knew how to help you heal. There was no way she'd let a boy get in between the two of you. Certainly not Spencer, of all people.
Her dark curiosity doesn't have to try hard to get the best of her. With fast thumbs, Sydney scrolls through your private conversation. Eyes glued to the screen as she read. Months of late night texts, date plans, and false promises. For what ? It was incredible to her; you really thought Spencer loved you.
It was sad and deluded.
Without thinking twice, Sydney blocks Spencer's contact. Deleting your text history before doing the same to his number. Taking it a step further, she clears your phone's recently deleted. Just like that, Spencer was no longer a problem for either of you.
⟡ finishing up my first fic for lovely little Spencer
⟡ brainstorming a novella for flashing lights...
⟡ father of my daughters 🩷💋
📚 Series
“Flashing Lights”, 🍋 - Ongoing, The story of how you and Spencer Reid fell for each other is a rocky one. From the sweet beginnings of an odd pair to the tough obstacles the two of you face. Your relationship was a roller coaster of emotions. Determined to make it work despite the strong disapproval of your best friend Sydney. You were ready to ride through the highs and lows. But dark secrets lie beneath the surface of your relationships. Ones that Spencer and Sydney have been keeping from you. Will you and Spencer be able to make it work despite the circumstances and find a way back to each other? Or will your love story end in tragedy?
🤓 Oneshots
Illicit affairs
Being with Spencer means getting lover letters on the regular
Everything on your wishlist
Being with Spencer means getting lover letters on the regular
⟡ Accidentally fell involve with fez, Rip to ash and let's pray season 3 makes sense
⟡ Living happily on a farm, eating cereal and playing video games with Ashtray.
⟡ Writing a late father’s day oneshot… this july
📖 Series
“Grey”, 🍋 - Completed, There were many reasons for you to love Fezco. Built trust, a strong connection and a long history. But is all that enough for you to forgive him and start over ?
🪩 Oneshots
Growin up - Throwing a birthday party for Ash
Period care - Ash helping on the first day of your period
In such high demand he requires his own masterlist.
⟡ my og muse
⟡ Fic coming... 2026 ?
⟡ currently writing an new smut oneshot 😁 🤗… sometime in july
📖 Series
“So you’re the babysitter, huh?” - Completed, Babysitting should have been easy money, but It’s hard to pay attention to the baby. When his older brother is paying way more attention to you.
“She’s an angel”, 🍋 - Completed, The thought of being a virgin in college is terrifying, lucky reuniting with your childhood best friend means he won’t let that happen. Friends with benefits never works in the movies or books or on tv, but it’ll be different this time, right ? Right.
🥁 Oneshots
Makeup sex, 🍋
Something new, 🍋
Stage five clinger
Drum Lesson, 🍋
She keeps to herself
The freak and his cheerleader
Traces of you on my pillowcase, 🍋
Sunday skincare
Burr basket season
🚐 Moodboards
Snowball fights with Rodrick ❄️🎀
Date night with Rodrick means getting high and doing arts and crafts
a/n: a bit worried everyone will hate this/ that its too similar to traces of you but here it its. I've had this idea for far too long and I am determined to stay consistent lol. Tell me if we are getting int too freaky territory or not yall.
Completed, 27 chapters, “She’s an angel” Rodrick Heffley x black fem reader. This oneshot is a bonus chapter to a finished fic, tell me what yall think about them ? This takes place during the fic.
content warning - nsfw, solo masterbation with someone else underwear idk ?
After the rather scandalous summer, Rodrick had spent with you. He hadn't been able to get you out of his mind. Not like he was really trying to though. Instead, Rodrick was enjoying his last few days of freedom. Sleeping late, sleeping in, and stroking himself to the filthy memories he made with you.
Most of them you were just reading, getting lost in dirty words. Sitting by the pool in your sexy pink swimsuit. But this was different; you were different. Dirty, needy, curious. In the same way, he was. Whether you wanted to admit it or not.
Opening the top drawer Rodrick slowly pulls out the black underwear. He chuckles at the sight of the small pink bow.
“How cute.”
In truth, he knew that this was exactly what you wanted. The thought of it made his dick jump in his suddenly tight boxers. Rodrick remembers the way your thick brown thighs stretched the sheer material. Apart from how good you looked, he couldn't get over the idea of you getting all dressed. For him.
Almost shamefully, Rodrick balled your underwear in his hand. Before returning to his bed. Carefully, he revealed the bundle of fabric against his pale palm. Was he really going to do this ? Was it really that wrong ?
It didn't take long for Rodrick's desire to choose for him. With his free hand, Rodrick stroked his bulge over his pajama pants. Thumbs working in unison as he teased his tip and caressed the little bow. Imagining he was touching you and not this silly piece of fabric. Making you feel just as good as you made him.
“Fuck.” he cursed quietly before taking in a sharp breath of air.
Rodrick's brown eyes couldn't help but flutter shut at the thought of you. Slowly he rested his head back as his roaming gentle thumb became a firm, rough grip. But the friction wasn't enough. Rodrick needed more of you.
With his pants gone, he wastes no time indulging in memories. Wetting his thumb before bringing it to his aching pink tip. Precum already dripping as he swirled the flat of his thumb. Sending instant waves of pleasure through him. Sneaky moans and shaking breaths slipping out as Rodrick began to stroke himself.
Tightly, Rodrick held his souvenir. Soft black fabric flowing between his fingers. He wondered if you were doing the same. Chasing the same high as him. With him.
“Faster y/n faster,” he urged you, chasing his orgasm.
Behind his shut eyes, Rodrick remembers the way you moaned beside him. The way that small pink bow shock as you worked your fingers on your clit. The slick sounds of arousal filled his ears. So easily, you unraveled with him. Nothing like the shy, good girl everyone else knew.
But everything, like the girl he liked, the girl you really were. One who came to his room to have sex and left with no underwear on. Who reads dirty books without a care.
“Fuck ahh, good girl.”
He wanted more, needed more. Abandoning his teasing touch, Rodrick quickly exchanges it for something much rougher. With both hands, he stroked himself, bucking his hips into the wet, tight mess he created. Fucking it the way he hoped you enjoyed.
Would you watch him with those brown, lustful eyes? Shudder in excitement at the sight of his dick in one hand and your underwear in the other. If he were a character in your book would hide him in your top drawer, under your pillow, like a dirty secret. Read him over and over until... until.
Rodrick is wordless as he comes. Struggling to say your name, he can't help but call out to you. Burying the side of his face into his pillow, Rodrick turned to you. Only to be met with nothing but empty sheets and summer memories.
Fluttering his eyes open, Rodrick hesitated for a moment. Staring at the milky white ropes that now covered his hands and your underwear. He knew what he wanted to do, but instead Rodrick cautiously brought his fingers to his mouth. Humming happily as the warmth of his orgasm hit his tongue. The taste reminded him of you.
Once the high of his orgasm was gone, Rodrick's head was pulled out of the clouds. He was back on earth, left alone in his room with nothing. Nothing but memories of summer. That and your ruined underwear.
God he missed you. His dirty angel.
my full masterlist
“She’s an angel” Rodrick Heffley x black fem reader
Ongoing, 22/? chapters "Flashing Lights" Spencer Reid x black fem stripper reader
tw: Mentions of Dilaudid, Opioids, needle
You weren't sure what you were thinking. In fact, you were unsure if you were thinking at all. Though this wasn't the first time you'd sat in the BAU parking garage waiting for Spencer, you had a strange feeling it would be the last. It was a sickly sweet feeling that sat in the pit of your stomach. A growing darkness that was impossible to ignore.
For too long now, you wanted to stay out of whatever Spencer was going through. You gave him space and tried to comfort him from afar, but that clearly wasn't working. Was showing up at his job any better, no, probably not. But if what you'd read online was true, Spencer need your help, whether he wanted to acknowledge it or not.
Stepping out of your car, you were quick to enter the building. Trying not to panic as you realized you were walking into a government building with a dead man's opioid prescription. Not just a dead man, but one who killed his father. And if the article you'd found online was true. Tobias Hankel had killed Spencer too. With his hands and his needle.
The moment the elevator doors opened you were spotted by Derek and the rather eccentric woman by his side. Penelope was her name, you remembered her quirky style and close relationship to Spencer's best friend. According to the two of them it was a slow day at the BAU. And with no case or paper work they were happy to entertain you. At least until Spencer noticed.
Starting with a quick tour of their office floor. Showing you the small kitchen, Spencer made his overly sweet coffee in. The vending machines he bought his daily sweet treats from. And the desk he sat in beside Derrick and E…
“Elle right ?” you asked without thinking. “She left right?”
Penelope’s smile flattened into a straight line. Her face held the same sad expressions Spencer’s did when talking about the former agent. You reminisce on the night that now felt like ages ago. Spencer crying in your arms and sharing memories now soaked in guilt.
“Who sits there now ?”
“Emily does. Emily pren-”
As if almost on cue, the dark haired woman sat down.
“Tiss.” Penelope looked to you. “Speak of the devil. Y/n L/n, Emily Prentiss.”
She introduced the two of you and, as most agents do, She shook your hand. Maybe it was her hair or her physic, but it was hard to ignore the glaring similarities between the two. Their names even started with the same letter, it was almost unnerving.
“It’s nice to finally meet you y/n. All this time I thought maybe Reid having a girlfriend was an inside joke.”
“Does Spencer joke about me often ?”
Her wide smile is quick to drop.
“No-No of course not it's mostly Morgan. Only good things, of course.” she tried her best to assure you. “I see you two have the same sense of humor.”
You chuckle in hopes to ease the unwarranted tension.
“Sorry I’m just having a long day and Spencer he’s-”
“Trust me I know. You should try working with him.” Emily smiled in distress.
“The two of you aren't getting along?”
Besides you, Penelope scoffed. Slyly speaking up before taking a sip from her coffee.
“That would be an understatement.”
You were almost surprised to hear that your relationship wasn't the only place Spencer struggled in. It brought an odd comfort and unsettling realization. You weren't the only one noticing the change in him. And you weren't the only one impacted, either.
“Let’s just say we're butting heads.”
You wanted to question her further but being caught at Spencer's desk talking to someone he clearly didn't like wasn't a good idea. Let alone showing up to his work unannounced.
Cutting the conversation short with Emily, Penelope finished her tour with her tech room. Showing you her work space and abstract decor. The large collection of black screens was an interesting sight, yet she looked at home nonetheless.
“I hope I’m not keeping you from anything important.”
Though she’d told you it was a “slow” day, it was still the FBI after all.
“Nope.”
“No-No I um, I just wanted to see if we had time to talk.”
Gossip. You wanted to gossip with her and a small part of you both knew it was about Spencer. Working with him and being in a relationship with him, you both saw different sides to Spencer’s struggle.
“Oh I’m all ears.”
“It’s nothing really I just… What did Emily mean by butting heads? I know it’s a hard transition with Elle being gone but butting heads ?” you tried to keep a disinterested tone.
You knew little to nothing about the new agent beyond her name. But the thought of Spencer taking his grief out on her and to a certain extent you, was an uneasy one. Was he using dualidid to forget Elle? Or the blooded soaked memories ?
“From what I’ve heard from Derrick they’re like two cats meeting for the first time with Arron having to pull Spencer off Emily.”
Your lips parted in surprise.
“Verbally of course. That and the tension. Not sexual, of course, that's all me and chocolate thunder?”
You wanted to press for more, but you weren't sure how. Penelope wasn't just a coworker but a close friend. If Spencer was hiding his usage from you, there was no way she would know anything beyond his change in behavior. And even if she did, would she tell you?
Would anyone in this building? It was just another thing you hadn't thought too far into.
It meant not only you, but an agent too, acknowledging and admitting that Spencer was using dualidid. That he’d at worst stolen from a dead body and at best just from a case. And remembering how it landed into your hands only made things worse, if the date on the article was accurate. Spencer had it with him all this time, in his bag, of all places.
Was he using at work ? Was this evidence, were you evidence of it? There was no way you could tell anyone working here without them having to report it. Spencer could lose his job, or… The deeper you thought, the darker it got.
“Could you show me the bathroom?”
You weren't sure whether you wanted to throw up or cry, but your lack of breakfast chose for you. Overcome with a rush of emotions, you couldn't help but burst into tears in the quiet, empty bathroom. Sobbing as you struggled to catch your breath and stop the overflowing tears. You hated crying, especially when it was long overdue. It always left you with a headache, heartache and worst puffy eyes.
The sound of the heavy wooden door opening followed by the click of heels against the floor was quick to shut you up. Forcing you to even your breath as wiped away tears. A lousy attempt at cleaning your face and hiding your pain. That along with the surprising thin toilet paper or lack thereof. Of all places, you expected the FBI to pitch in on the toilet paper at least.
“H-hello?” the woman called in concern.
Silently, you cursed yourself. Embarrassed and more upset now than you were before. Quickly, you grabbed your purse off the silver hook. And with a deep breath, you flushed the thin paper away and left the stall. Only to meet Emily on the other side.
“Oh y/n? I-”
“Excuse me.”
You weren't sure how, but this day was only getting worse and worse. Bolting past the dark haired woman, you wanted to leave as soon as possible. Not just this bathroom but the whole goddamn building.
“Is it Spencer?”
Her words stopped you in your tracks. Halfway out the door, you turned around and shut it behind you. Fighting every instinct in your body that told you to run. And that told you to lock the door.
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve only known him for a few months, though I think he’d disagree.” a beat. “I don’t think we started off on a bad foot, but he’s changed recently, hasn't he?”
This time you stayed silent.
“Restless more than usual, isolating himself, easily agitated.” she swallows and looks at her hands. “Mean.”
She took the words out your mouth. Though you’d never say it out loud. Mean… Was he really being mean to her?
“Trauma can do that to you.”
Death can too, Emily told herself.
“What happened ? I mean, I-I looked it up online, but Spencer hasn't told me anything. Not since Elle and-and”.
“Looked what up ?”
The thought of the small glass bottle in your purse came back to you. Suddenly the gift from Spencer, of all people, felt heavy. Hot even, The dark secret burning a hole through you. Tightly, you gripped the strap and walked away. Emily follows behind you.
“y/n” she calls your name before another voice does the same.
Spencer’s voice. And suddenly Emily wasn't the only one you were running from. Or speed walking from. But unlike Spencer, she wasn't following you through the floor and onto the elevator.
Furiously pushing the button, you'd never worked your fingers that fast. Well, maybe you had.
“What are you doing here ?” He looked worse.
Both of you did.
“Going home.”
The silver doors opened with a ding. Two agents step out as you struggle to enter from the side. Still trying your best to seem somewhat polite.
“I mean, why are you here?” he specifies as he struggles to enter behind the agents. “Are you crying?”
“No, it's nothing, I’m just- I’m not feeling good.” you lied as you hid the side of your face with your hand.
You knew Spencer would question you, but you weren't expecting to be under a microscope with your boyfriend on the other side. So much for dating a profiler.
“You still haven't explained why you’re here, y/n?”
“It doesn't matter.”
“It does.” he argued. “Why won't you tell me what's wrong?” his firm voice suddenly soft, pleading.
“Why won’t you ?”
You looked at Spencer with tear stained cheeks. How ironic coming from him.
A ding and the large doors were open once again. Without a second thought, you walked towards your car, leaving Spencer in the elevator stunned.
“y/n.” he called after you.
The sound of your name echoes in the parking lot as the distance grows. But Spencer is quick to follow behind you. Legs practically working on autopilot, you found your car in no time. While your car was easy to find, your keys were not. With a hand rummaging through your purse, one swift move sent your things flying.
You watched as your phone hit the ground, the screen shattering before your very eyes. Frozen in shock, you simply picked it up and kept moving, instantly searching the floor for anything else that had fallen, broken or was rolling away.
Seeing you struggle from afar, Spencer runs to help you. Picking up what he could before stumbling across the small glass bottle. He doesn't need to read the label to know what it is. The cold feel of the glass is a familiar one to Spencer’s fingers, he grips his arm as the sting of the needle shoots through him.
“Where did you get this ?” Spencer asked slowly.
You wanted to snatch it out of his hand, but all you could think of was making it home. And crying in your bed.
“Where did you get this ?” he asked you again, harsher this time.
Staying silent, you returned everything to your purse and ignored Spencer’s question. But your silence does nothing to calm your boyfriend's racing mind.
“Is that why you were here ? W-with Prentiss?”
He sounds hurt more than anything, his tired eyes already priming with tears.
“I was just using the bathroom, and she came in-”
It was the truth after all, at least all of the truth that Spencer needed to know for now.
“I don’t believe you,” he argued.
“Excuse me ?”
“What were you doing with her? With this ? How did you even find it?”
He bombards you with pointed questions, his voice louder than you expected. Tired of feeling helpless and silent, you matched Spencer’s tone.
“Where did you ?”
It was all too much. Everything you’d uncovered, all the stress and secrets he’d been harboring. The lies and arguing. You were going back and forth and getting nowhere until you heard Spencer say it.
“What?” you practically froze in place. “What did you say?”
Suddenly the two of you were silent. Spencer’s eyes sunk into their sockets and his throat went dry. Even with an IQ of 187 Spencer was unsure how to answer the dangerous question. Was he breaking up with you ?
“Spencer.”
He opened his mouth, yet all Spencer could do was stare. He swallowed and the anger in his face slowly melted away. For a moment he looked softer than he had in months, but it hardened. And his puppy dog eyes went cold.
“You need to leave.” He wasn't yelling anymore, but he kept his voice direct. “This clearly isn't working. Go home.”
He forced himself to turn around before you could get a word in, quickly returning to the elevator. Again it was silent, though the echoes of Spencer’s decision still bounced off the walls. Your lips fell into a straight line before your bottom lips began to shake. Freely, tears fell from eyes as your vision began to blur.
You drove off before you would be stuck crying in the parking garage. Too focused to see Spencer following behind your car on foot.
Next chapter – 22 – You never learn, do you
All chapters – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23
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a/n: I feel like this is bad but a secret soft spot for Robin
Truly, Robin wasn’t sure what she was doing here. When you asked her to come to a party, she wasn't expecting a party party. This was too much for her. And with Steve wanting Robin to experience it with you only. She was without her wingman. But at least she had you.
“Are you having fun ?” you asked robin as you handed her a red solo cup.
She flashes a fake smile to conceal her panic. Unfortunately, it doesn't work well.
“Do you drink ?”
“No.” She shakes her head. “Only… Only on holidays, my dad gives me some wine behind my moms back. But she says it makes me wired. Or I guess unwired like my loose screws get more loose.”
She rambles on, not realizing she was doing it. Quickly, Robin took a sip from the red cup to stop herself from speaking. All you could do was smile as you watched the sour taste of the juice alcohol mix hit her. Not wanting her to be alone, you took a sip alongside Robin.
“Don't worry, the taste is worth it in the long run.”
It didn't take long for the alcohol to do its job. But beyond that, there was a natural high in the atmosphere. Maybe it was the party itself or the way you and Robin could freely explore the large home. But right now, for the first time in a long time, Robin was careless, no longer held back or caged by her rampant mind.
Following you down the large staircase connected by intertwined hands, her eyes fell on the living in confusion. Yours in disgust. In the corner of the room, a group of boys were huddled around god's know what. Gawking, oohing and awing. Robin wasn't sure what was worse, their reactions or yours.
The two of you bolted past the party and headed outside.
“Were they kissing?” Robin blurted out.
“Yes.” your response was quick.
Before she could ask one of the million questions rushing her mind. You were already climbing up the three house and waiting for Robin to do the same.
Stopping at the bottom of the wooden staircase, she couldn't help but turn back to the house. Heart beating out of her chest as the warmth of the alcohol set Robin's inside ablaze. But the party didn't hold her attention for long.
“Are you coming?” you asked her from above.
“Y-yea.”
“Watch your step.”
Robin wanted to ask you about it, but truthfully she was scared. Terrified of what you'd say and how she'd act. But in the corner of tree house, she couldn't help but sense your growing distress. The small sound of sniffling filled her ears like an alarm.
“I just don't get it.” you complained, more to yourself than Robin.
“What's wrong ?” she couldn't help but ask.
Hiding your face with your hands, you quickly wipe away those stubborn tears.
“It's… it's nothing.” you tried to push the subject away. “Let's just go back to the hou-”
“You can tell me.” Robin spoke up. “I mean I-I won't tell anybody.”
Her voice is soft, almost a whisper.
“It's not like I have anyone to tell anyway.”
You couldn't help but chuckle at Robin's honesty. The alcohol was clearly doing something to the both of you.
“Promise me you won't tell anyone. You can't tell anyone.”
You weren't sure why, but you trusted Robin. But it wasn't just that. It was the heavy guilt and the pain. You needed someone to know, to understand.
“You saw the two girls in the living room, right? The one that were-”
“Kissing.” she finished your sentence without meaning to.
“I was best friends with one of them. She thought I had a crush on some boy she liked and hated me for it. Told everyone I tried to kiss her in the locker room. But two years later we got invited to our first party and she- she kissed me right there. I opened my eyes and they were all watching. I thought she liked me, but she was doing it all for him.”
Keeping your eyes focused on the distance as you spoke, it was bittersweet to say aloud. It was a scary thing to admit. You knew you'd done nothing wrong yet still felt so… guilty. Dirty. Remembering the way she could so easily touch, kiss and toss you aside.
Across from you, Robin was frozen. Unsure what to say, to do.
“I'm sorry.” she apologized, genuinely sorry for what you'd been through.
You cleared your throat and wiped away a stream of runaway tears.
“It's not your fault.”
“Do-do people do that a lot? Like Kiss in front of everyone.”
“Yea, for attention.” you spat. “It's pathetic really. They only kiss at parties for guys.”
“Do you only kiss girls at parties?” Robin asked you without thinking.
“Wha-”
“I mean-” She started to clarify quickly. “Would you kiss me ?”
In the silence of the night, her breaths grew heavy.
“Do you want me to ?”
A beat.
“Yes.” she whispered scared, breathless.
You weren't sure if it was the alcohol making your body buzz. Or the cool summer wind that blew through the tree house, making your hairs stand up. But you knew for sure it was the feel of Robin's lips. The soft, plump skin that felt like electricity against yours. She met your lips like a secret, firm and quiet. And left them like a promise.
Thinking about young girl dad Spencer Reid. Taking weekends off work to take care of his daughter's hair. Shopping at beauty supply stores, religiously reading the back of every product before picking it up for his girls. Going out of his way to buy sensory sensitive beads that won't fall, be too heavy or loud for his tendered head angels. Drawing diagrams of their heads to get the perfect middle part. Always being scared that he's tying their scarfs too tight at night. Him having an eidetic memory and still not being able to find their bonnets. Reading up on hair care, type, and porosity. Educating himself on the science and history of his daughter's beautiful black curls.
I'm tired of the TikTokification and Mischaracterization of Rodrick Heffley 😕
I know this is a semi random post, but I was on TikTok and saw a video basically mischaracterizing Rodrick with the song “Teenage Dirtbag”. Saying that he is the type of teenager people think the song is about, based off the title and not the actual lyrics.
Basically saying the song is about loners with no friends and not actual teenage dirtbags. In my opinion, he works for the title and song.
I know because of edits, the way he dresses and being in a band. People think for some reason that Rodrick is cool or is a popular kid.
If you know anything about Rodrick from the movies or the books, this is wrong. Just because Rodrick had a party and had people come over doesn’t mean that those people were his friends. He only had I would say about 2 to 3 friends. And they were people who were in the band with him. Besides that, he was completely ignored by Heather Hills, who was his crush and a popular girl. And his music/band wasn’t really taken seriously… even his friends kicked him out the band for Bill.
I just think it’s funny how people have made Rodrick into this emo, edgy punk. When he's a loser at heart.
Mind you, he drove an old white van and his band's name is Löded Diper…
