In many ways i feel as though she betrayed me
My oshi
My friend
Gone just like that
Months have past since i last heard her voice
I remember the first time i heard it
Sometimes i wish the first time had been the last
She was there when i needed her
She called me her friend
She went out of her way for me at times
Even they’re in the end
But then she left me just the same as everyone else
I wanted to beg
Just one channel left
I would’ve promised to have been less needy
To give her more space
But it would not have been fair, to the rest in which she have even listened
Likely she would have left me along with the rest anyways
She called me her friend
She lied to me
And now shes gone
7 months now
Her birthday approachs
And I wondered to myself if she came back tomorrow would I be happy?
Could I trust her?
Could I ever trust her as I had?
Perhaps that bond is forever severed
 Perhaps it doesn’t matter
After all, you don’t leave like that if you intend to come back
She might as well be dead
To me, she might as well be dead
But I can’t help I but hope
Somehow someway that she will return and then when she does, I’ll be able to smile and we’ll be able to go on like nothing happened
But i dont forget
I cant forget
Abandoned like nothing
Like i meant nothing
But again
It doesnt matter anymore
I have no oshi