This Mommy's Musings

  I'm a wife and a mother of three young girls. I am a classically trained dancer with a degree in Psychology. I run on very little sleep and a lot of caffeine. These are the thoughts that emerge from my brain, flow through my heart and progress to the page .

[mommysmusings]

Dreamers

I have written previously about my admiration for the women of National Pro Fastpitch (NPF) and the example they set for young ladies.  These women have proven that a dreams can become reality, as long as you believe in yourself, work hard and never give up.

For my littlest, G, her dream initially was to be like her big sister.  The BIG is 12 and is in her 4th season of travel softball.  In those four years, G has spent a good amount of time on the side lines; watching, learning and waiting.

Last year, G met Chicago Bandits pitcher Morgan Foley.  By attending as many home games as we could and with little help from social media - they developed the sweetest most genuine relationship.  Many real life hugs and smiles have been exchanged - and Georgia's dream has grown a little bigger.

This season, Morgan signed with the The Scrapyard Dawgs (SYD), based in Conroe, TX -  so the hugs were few and far between.  In the last few weeks of the season, the SYD FINALLY came to town. G was next level excited.

A post shared by megreimers (@megreimers) on Jul 26, 2017 at 6:29am PDT

As always we enjoyed the game and then the girls ran down to get in the autograph line.  G stood on her tippy toes, straining to get glimpse of her (former) "Bandits Bestie", and then the moment finally came: 

A post shared by megreimers (@megreimers) on Jul 26, 2017 at 8:41pm PDT

We chatted for a bit and then line had to move along - but not before I had mentioned that we were going to do our best to come and see them again when the SYD returned to Chicago the following week.

Flash forward 6 days. Life is hectic and I hear the familiar sound of a notification beckoning me. To my surprise, it is a message from Morgan.

"...I hope you all can make it to the game tomorrow night!  Please let me know if so, I have a little something to give Georgia."

She remembered.  This professional athlete who has seen 1,000 other little faces since we spoke, who has been playing softball, on the road with her team, remembered that I said we'd try to be there.  We were going to get to that game through Hell or high water.

We pull up to the stadium and as we are walking in it starts to downpour.  We grab our tickets from will call and go find a place to hide until the rain clears. The game is delayed.  When we are able to head to our seats - G's radar goes off.  "Mommy! Morgan is in the bullpen!  I think she's pitching tonight!" and she takes off like a shot.  G gets to the edge of the stands and gazes intently into the bullpen, willing Morgan to look up at her - and then she does.  

She waves and motions for G to meet her outside the gate.  G runs down the steps and as she's rounding the corner, Morgan is walking up from the dugout. They exchange a giant hug and Morgan says "I got you a little something!  I wanted to make sure we had matching headbands in my new team colors." They exchange another hug before she goes back to warm up and I notice inside the headband package, is a letter: 

We returned to our seats (I am pretty sure G floated).  Morgan did pitch that game.  Well.  She endured a lightning delay and maintained focusing through an amazing fireworks display from a neighboring establishment.

The Scrapyard Dawgs won.  The girls ran down to the autograph line once again.  This time G brought a little something for Morgan:

"When I grow up to be a famous softball player, I want to make sure Morgan had my first autograph" - Georgia, age 7. 

Georgia had an announcement for her Daddy and I just days later.  "I'm trying out for 10U travel this year " she said.  

My heart dropped.  I was nervous for her. She's seven - a full year younger than the BIG was when she started.  She's little.  I didn't want her to be hurt or disappointed, but I would never tell her not to try. So, she tried - she did great - but didn't make the team. "She's young"... "She's small"... "She's immature." She's also a dreamer.

A few weeks later - through a series of events - G was invited to attend practice with a different travel team, so the Coach could "take a look at her".  She was offered a spot that day.  

Dream big always and never let anyone tell you you can't do something because you can achieve anything you set your mind too.  

I would wager that someone once spoke those words to Morgan Foley.  Dream believers become dream achievers...pass it on.

[mommysmusings]

Play Like a Girl

Today is National Girls & Women in Sports Day. A day celebrating the extraordinary achievements of women and girls in sports as well as recognizing those who have helped to effect change and create opportunities for future generations.

My husband and I are raising three daughters.  Three girls that we hope will grow to be strong, passionate and independent.  We pray that as they forge their own path that they will be blessed with outstanding role models.

Trying to raise children to be good, decent, humans is HARD.  Trying to raise GIRLS that are strong, confident leaders and providing them with role models that are exemplary?? 

Really. Damn. Hard. 

That is until our oldest “L”  came home at 7 years old and said she wanted to play softball. 

Sometime during her first season of recreational softball, a representative for the Chicago Bandits came to my office with promotional vouchers.  I thought “What fun!  She will love this!” and immediately bought tickets to a game on Father’s Day. It may have been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

What we saw that Father’s day was so much more than a softball game. Our little girls saw strong, confident women, that are grateful for the opportunity to do something they are passionate about on a professional level.  

“L” is now in her third season playing on a Fastpitch travel team.  She and her teammates have had the opportunity to play on the same field as these women twice now, through the Bandits of Tomorrow program, and we attend as many games as we can each season.

The first game we attend every season begins with purchasing a program.  A program that by the last day of the season will be tattered and torn, pages falling out - because she studies it, memorizing every stat of every player, so she can recite them to us as they take the field.

With each season that has passed, I’ve learned so much more than their statistics.

I’ve learned that these women play hard both on and off the field.  

They are SO smart.

They are good, decent humans. They volunteer and advocate for causes that are near and dear to their hearts.

They are passionate.  They LOVE their sport and want to share that love with the world.  

They are genuine.  These professional athletes play a full game and then - win or lose, sweaty and exhausted - come out to meet their fans. They smile. REALLY smile.  And sign autographs.  And take pictures.  And talk with them; about the positions they play, how long they’ve been playing and if they had fun.   And they ALWAYS say “Thank you for coming”.

They are EXEMPLARY role models.

My littlest “G” has started to catch the softball bug.  If you ask her, she’ll tell you that her favorite Bandit is #20, Morgan Foley.  Why?  “Because she’s my Bandits Bestie!”

This was the first time they met.   She was THE ONLY player G spoke to in line. She stood totally silent except for a few quiet “Thank you’s”. When Morgan walked up she suddenly lit up - their exchange was precious.

Since then we’ve had moments like this: 

A video posted by megreimers (@megreimers) on Aug 5, 2016 at 9:24am PDT

And she did give her a big hug.  Not just once, but at every game we’ve attended since.

And you know what?  Those moments resulted in this moment.

THIS moment is what today is about and these are the women we celebrate.

For more information on National Girls and Women in Sports Day and how you can get involved, visit:

National Girls and Women in Sports Day

The Women’s Sports Foundation

For more information or to purchase tickets for the Back to Back National Pro Fastpitch Champions, visit:

Chicago Bandits

To check out more shirts like the one G is wearing that encourage kindness, visit my friends (some other great role models!) over at Mama Said Tees.

Edit: Mama Said Tees is now EVERYKIND

[mommysmusings]

Softball has officially started as of Sunday. 

[mommysmusings]

It’s Time

Stop.  Just Stop. 

Our nation is in disrepair and we are on the verge of destroying ourselves. 

I’ll tell you why.  Individuals have come to believe that their rights are more significant than the whole of human kind.  We are a society of self-righteous whiners.  We have bastardized and diluted our Constitutional Rights.  Rather than being the supreme law of the land, they appear to be open to interpretation: mere guidelines for our existence.

Our "leaders" only further perpetuate this belief by pacifying our toddleresque tantrums with amendments, rulings and laws; many of which have no real significance other than mollification.

The media encourages this behavior with aberrant reporting and propaganda. 

We are ignorant and ignorance breeds fear. 

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” 

SOCIETY IS SUFFERING.  So again, I say STOP.

Stop choosing ignorance. Stop accepting fear. Stop harboring anger and dammit Stop stimulating hate.

Choose Love.

We are waging war against ourselves and only we can enact peace.  

*You can find this shirt and other messages of Love and Kindness at Mama Said Tees.  Two of my favorite Mama’s changing the world one tee at a time.

[mommysmusings]

March 18th is a big day....it's the day I got my first title, my first job and my best friend. On March 18th I became a Big Sister!!! Happy Birthday, Ash. I love you!!!

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I've lost count of how many this is in a row..... #proudmama

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My little artist on display at the library #district118artshow

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Thank you Bliss for getting me through the rest of this day. I ❤️ u.

[mommysmusings]

Hero Support

Mom's are eternally reaching to achieve the status of "Super-Mom".  We strive to have well behaved children, happy husbands, organized schedules, clean homes and successful careers (that includes SAHM's!).

Let's explore the premise that we are in fact Super Hero's.  Our super powers allow us to achieve the impossible task of successfully managing our families in today's society.  Who then is there to back us up?

Have you seen the movieSky High?  The abbreviated version is that the students of this special school for those with super human powers, are segregated.  There are the "Hero's" and the "Side Kicks". Incoming freshman are pigeon holed into one of these two groups.  The son of two famous superheroes does not actually know if he has any powers of his own and seems destined to grow up a mere sidekick. As he discovers his true strengths, he also learns that it takes loyalty and teamwork to truly become a hero! 

The "Side-Kicks" are re-branded "Hero Support".  Although their powers are not as flashy or awe-inspiring, that makes them no less necessary to conquering evil villains.

As parent's there are many villains that we must face.  It is important that we find  "Hero Support" of our own.  I always assumed that this support came from the obvious - my husband, parents and family.  A trip to Target last week opened my eyes to an under-utilized support system.  Let me share my experience.

I had been at Target for the typical 2-hour grocery shopping trip (and I only had 2 of the three!).  They had been fairly well behaved. I was leaving with my wits about me and my ponytail was still neatly in tact (it is not uncommon for me to leave looking like a participant in a Don King look-a-like contest).

It was HOT, so I told the girls they weren't going to get in the car right away because I didn't want them to melt.  They were sitting nicely as I unloaded groceries into the back of the car.  The woman in the car next to me approached.  Her handsome pre-teen boys raced past each other to get in as she began to unload her own groceries.  I maneuvered the cart a little so I wasn't in anyone's way.

I smiled and continued packing the car, she looked at the girls and began telling them how beautiful they were.  I prompted them to say "Thank you".  They did and then of course smiled and giggled like little girls do.  She could have stopped there, but she didn't.  She continued on..talking to them, telling them that she could tell that they have a wonderful Mommy that takes very good care of them.  They of course responded by saying "She bought us cookies!!!". 

I was taken aback for a moment.  A complete stranger took a moment to reassure me that I was doing a good job at being a Mommy.  Such a simple gesture, but so magnanimous. The "Thank you" that followed was from me and I couldn't have meant it more sincerely.  We chatted for a few minutes, corralled our carts and parted ways.

I sat in my car for a few minutes, reflecting on what had just happened.  The way she made me feel in that moment, is how all Mom's should feel.  ALL THE TIME. 

As Super-mom's we battle many evils...tantrums, germs, grocery prices...  But the biggest villain we face is ourselves.  We constantly question the quality of the job we are doing.  Do I yell to much?  Could I do more?  That is when we need our "Hero Support"...that is when we need each other.

In your quest to be "Super-Mom", I challenge you to be another mother's "Hero Support".  Take a moment to remind her that she is SUPER. I can't think of anything more powerful.

[mommysmusings]

My C and Me

[mommysmusings]

The Politics of Children

This morning was eye opening to me. I cannot explain why without telling you a little bit about my relationship with my second daughter. C is my tomboy. She is a lover of CARS, dinosaurs and trucks. Her favorite pair of shoes are a hand me down pair of VANS from her older sister, with the "girly" skull and cross bones. I love her with my whole heart and she loves her Daddy. Now you might be thinking "Aren't they all Daddy's girls?". Let me be clear. She loves her Daddy and doesn't love her Mommy (at least not in so many words). I say "I love you!", she responds "I love Daddy" or sometimes says nothing at all. We get in to these power struggles, she is 3 afterall, and she will undoubtedly pull the Daddy card. EVERY TIME. She quickly learned the fine art of manipulating Mommy and I shamelessly allow it because of my bruised ego. It is something that has weighed on me HEAVILY. I've tried to reflect back on what I could have done wrong. Is she harboring resentment because she got a baby sister, when she was still a baby? (They are 14 months apart) Did I not show her enough affection? Am I a bad Mommy? It physically hurts me every time she chooses Daddy over me. I can literally feel my heart breaking. Of course, my husband is not shy about rubbing it in. In fact, he finds it hysterical. He is very proud of having one that it "his". Then this morning, something happened. I don't know if she intentionally let me in on her secret or if God knew I needed a pass. It started out like a typical morning. The sun is streaming through the windows and I wake up to a kick in the back. C is sprawled between us and the dog (a 70 lb Golden Retreiver) is wrapped around my head like a cat. G "the baby" is passed out on the floor next to the bed - the effort to climb up must have just been too great. L "the Big Sister" is in the bathroom, only partially awake, peeing in the dark with the door wide open. When L is finished, she squeezes into bed next to me. This causes G to stir, climb into bed on top of me and fall asleep on my face. I hear the hubby roll out of bed and head to the bathroom. I carefully turn my head, so as not to disturb the baby, and look straight into the deep blue eyes of the three year old. Then it happens. She smiles. I reach out my hand. She takes it, presses it to her cheek and whispers "until Daddy comes back". I whisper "Is it a secret?" and she giggles. Our moment is interrupted by a toilet flushing. We hear footsteps...her eyes get wide, she shoos my hand away and scoots backward. My hubby climbs back in bed and they snuggle in. She looks at me and smiles. Right then those big blue eyes told me something. She loves me. She loves her Daddy. She loves us both. She's not manipulating me. She's providing for her Daddy. I didn't do anything wrong. In fact, it seems I may have done it just right.

[mommysmusings]

Art washes from the soul, the dust of everyday life."

Pablo Picasso

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