crepe

@monards’ pathetic art/oc blog that’s mostly used for shit posting banner & pfp creds go to @/Sometime1209 on twitter

[monartistic]

i hope everyone knows i smile so wide and genuinely get incapacitated when any of you say something niceabout her or express any interest. im so bad at responding because i get embarrassed by it but it means Soooo much to me.all the time 🕊️🎊🌈i cry

[monartistic]

i really like moe's relationship w depression & her suicidality bc more than anything i realllyyyyyyyyyyyy like exploring the way it progresses & (beyond the images) the way that progression would obviously make the people around her react like "?!?!?" to her eventual immediate nose dive when shit does #hit the fan -> because while (((most prominently))) it's one of the only emotions she's ever known. (((second most prominently))) she has also obviously been masking & repressing it for so long that ppl around her are obviously going to be thrown off when she eventually erupts with it So expressively & tries acting on it in such quick & immediately succession

-> like smth smth. i really really like the ((WRITTEN)) dynamic/plot of how it's such a complex situation when someone who's depressed, but has masked it for so long, acts on it. bc you have to split your sympathies between the people around them who lost/almost lost them & are experiencing grief AND the person themselves who. obviously. is the one who was suffering the most & for that whole time while ALSO having to question it. bc with so much of the typical suicide talk being so focused on it being the fault of the person who killed themself. or that it ''came out of nowhere'' it's reallyyyy fun to begin to question like. was it reallyyyyy that. bc as far as anyone with commonsense knows. smbdy being depressed is not something that comes out of nowhere. and if you've supposedly known someone for So Long. no matter what you want to believe or think. if you (supposedly) didn't notice anything at all within that history, or even notice the MOST obvious signs when it was evident. you reallllllllllyyyyy gotta question if you were. the supposed 'support system that would've helped them'. that they needed. -> bc while i entirely understand that there ARE people who may mask incredibly well and truly be so blocked up that they'd never confess those things to you even if you begged and pleaded. i feel like i cannot fully convey the fact that the mass majority of people intent on killing themselves are masters of hiding every hint of their emotions & feelings & plans. especially if you are someone close to them and apparently KNOW them

^ and that's sooo important to me in context of moe. because my n1 favorite aspect of story written around those issues is thinking abt the relationship between that person & the people around them. ((because beyond it being like one million needles in the heart to think about how literally Anyone would react to the people around them saying they never knew or had any idea abt smth they struggled with so prominently)) -> it's really awesome to see the way those same things those ppl did in retrospect and be able to properly question and critcize the people around her. iygwim

[monartistic]

mfw i not only have to undergo and adhere to expectations of women but also be held to the same standards as men socially because of the way i choose to present and because i want to be loved

[monartistic]

cherise is kinda stuck being my crossuniverse delivery girl because I love them a lot

[monartistic]

this is also because she’s awesome at her job so I never have to worry

[monartistic]

cherise is kinda stuck being my crossuniverse delivery girl because I love them a lot

[monartistic]

I’m so so iffy on closed species as a whole but if there’s one thing I think is interesting abt them it’s making a world concept that people can insert/build off of

[monartistic]

I hate her I hate her she needs to die

[monartistic]

dove to me

[monartistic]

mi esposa she didn't like my glug glug glug is kinda what i imagine older dove's humor/tone as <- if you understand me

[monartistic]

i think a big part of abt what is Characteristically moe desperately seeking love & validation is that she still Realllyyy clearly has lines for how far she’ll go. even when she’s willing to fall pretty low -> like w her feminizing herself in the end, it’s clearly somewhat of an End to her bc following it is her trying to khs. w builds the implication that she wasn’t willing to get anymore desperate

^ it’s especially fun to me just bc I’m also curious if it’d be amended or changed in anyway by how quickly she received gratification or validation from whatever steps she may take -> and if she’d be more willing to be act more drastically, if the people in her life who she knew loved her didn’t immediately go “??!??” upon her acting that way and instead smth more affirmative

[monartistic]

i miss moe i miss moe so much -> I can’t even like meaningfully talk abt the ideas i have because they exist in so much of a vacuum and stretched out so much in my mind that im like Ok.

[monartistic]

thank you to everyone who cares about moe because i basically hold them against their will

[monartistic]

im the worst at collaborative brainstorming without feeling embarrassed nobody talk to me

[monartistic]

seeing all those rp groups focused on detective/adjacent to detective agencies changed my life -> they make me yearn

[monartistic]

dove caniry estrogen shot in the upper thigh

[monartistic]

maggiedove magnolia giving dove her estrogen shots

[monartistic]

one one hand i love making fun of moe -> on the other i don't want it to seem like it's okay to act like she's ever at fault for the fact she has smth inherently wrong with her brain and that she wants to die

[monartistic]

everytime i joke about her being hyper repressive i feel a bit bad bc im like. well that's because she's lived her life with the expectation of being pleasant and inexpressive and stomachable twofold to both feminine & masculine standard. i dont think that should be funny to joke about