Humans are very simple beings, especially men since they’re biologically wired to be less emotionally complex. Have you noticed how a lot of extremely attractive men or/and successful ones, often end up with very average women? While in some cases it’s because they seek an equal, aka a woman that is intellectually on their level or skills and capitals on their levels, I believe in most cases it’s mainly rooted from insecurity. Most individuals, females and males alike, are insecure to a certain degree. That’s also why the “I like a medium ugly guy, just want him to be funny and nice” is going around for girls as well. Being with a handsome, or successful men can be intimidating and make you insecure, or make you feel like he will like you less because he has choice and could leave you at any moment. Guys also think like that and, because they are even simpler beings, it goes even deeper, “am I enough, is she there for the right reasons, she probably talks to a lot of guys, maybe she doesn’t really like me, etc”. But that way of thinking is absolutely incorrect, because most humans, no matter how hot and powerful they are, are insecure too! So at they end of the day what they truly seek is reassurance and someone to stroke their ego, and men have a lot of ego that’s why there’s the whole notion of toxic masculinity, it’s so big because it is in fact very weak and fragile. If he finds you attractive, you have a nice personality, you have his attention already. Now to create an emotional connection all you have to do is compliment him, flattery is a strong weapon to gains someone’s favours. Seem honest, innocent and upfront (even if you’re not just act like it), act impressed over his accomplishments, no matter how uninteresting or vain they are, be supportive. Create a climate of trust. Guys often have this fantasy of having a gf/wife like their mother without realizing it. Creating this atmosphere that he can emotionally rely on you, that you’re admirative and supportive of his life and interest and giving him the impression that he’s the only one in your eyes and the best man on Earth will boost his confidence. If you’re manipulative, that might sound terrible but a good technique to make someone feel special create a special connection is to wait for a special moment (in a tête à tête over a glass of wine for exemple) confess a secret or talk about a trauma and letting them know “fuck you’re the first person I’m admitting this to wow” and they’ll feel really special and will most likely share their own trauma or secret, creating a special bond between you and them, and them feeling unique to get you to share such secret with them only (which if you’re really manipulative will be not really a secret but an information about your life that would seem like one but you don’t care about or even a straight up made up lie, so you withhold crucial information about them and they will have, well, nothing!). Constantly tell him you’ve never had such an instant connection with someone before. But don’t overdo it, wait for meaningful opportunities to drop your lines so it doesn’t look fake or insincere. Don’t glue his ass too, like I said before, be chill on text but love bomb him when you guys see each other’s so he gets subconsciously positively reinforced. After when you feel like your relationship is strong enough, start being distant and see how he reacts. He’ll probably be confused and try to get your attention back because he’ll feel abandoned and nobody makes him feel as good about himself like you, and when he does so tell him how much you missed talking to him and seeing him, how your bond was so unique, basically love bomb him again so it consolidates that you = him feeling good about himself and having a nice time. Voilà!
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