brother carlo

novice at farnham monastery, mystic of divine visions

[monk-the-carlo]

H

ello brothers and sisters. kindly i have been taken in as an initiate at farnham monastery because my God-given visions were unsettling the peoples of my small town. my holy duty is producing an illuminated manuscript illustrating and describing my visions, perhaps produce very many manuscripts to be compiled upon my death in a codex, lest take me the plague. #carlocodex seems to me the appropriate name for a compendium, not that i have been thinking very much about it... i am a humble servant of God..

(*this monastery is not real, peruse #monkposting for further information)

Prithee do not read my diary entrys that i have dropped herein 🙏 haha... lest?

NOR mine personal illumination pages

at any rate thou can find mine brothers and sisters and also laypersons and animal companions in the Farnham Masterlist

[theancientfootsteps-deactivated]

what if we each left our respective hometowns to live as hermits in the woods, but we ran into each other one day on a foggy morning by a river and had a life-changing conversation about faith and although we were both hesitant to give up our solitude, we were unable to ignore the magic of each other's company and we became life-long companions, not friends and not lovers but a secret third thing, and we found God in each other. and we were both boys

[monk-brother-matthew]

these physicians are insane

i've got leeches stuck in places i didn't know leeches could be stuck

[lady-isabella-farnham]

Myself and one of the monks have pulled an all nighter and are now just naming different sins

- gluttony

- lust

- France

- wrath

- whatever’s going on with cabbages these days

- birds

- wyre fraude

[lady-isabella-farnham]

- instagram reels

- all nighters

- theft

[lady-isabella-farnham]

- catholicism

- murder

- ibuprofen

- dinosaurs

- the cast of the x files

[lady-isabella-farnham]

- premarital sex

- post marital sex

- marital sex

- first base

- second base

- fifth base (third and fourth are fine when stockings remain on)

- sloth

- any egg that is too large

- all of the physicians in this damned waiting room

- gary

[lady-isabella-farnham]

- great western railway

[lady-isabella-farnham]

daddys got to be honest kitten, i dont think this crusade is worth it

[brotherhumphrey]

parsley

[hildegards-abbey]

sage

[monk-the-carlo]

mint!!!!!!

[brother-aethelstan]

THEOPHANIA HAS FARROWED!!!

…CHRIST’S WOUNDS THERE ARE TEN OF THEM SEND HELP

[blacksmith-oliver]

Would you like some assistance expanding the pen brother?

[brother-aethelstan]

…please. i’ve been trying to expand it on my own, and, well. let’s just say. infirmary

[monk-the-carlo]

🙏 praise be to God i shall find a nice vantage point to err............ oversee

[monkbrother-thomas]

i am straight up "jorking it" if by "jorking" you mean "pulling out" and by "it" you mean "the weeds in the herb garden"

[lady-isabella-farnham]

‘Cranking hog’, so long as ‘cranking’ means praying and ‘hog’ means ‘to the lord’

[monkbrother-thomas]

i thought "cranking my hog" would be making the pigs unhappy but that may also work!

[lady-isabella-farnham]

Wait that’s better pretend i said that

[brother-aethelstan]

if you crank the hogs, lord forgive me, i will Kill You.

[monk-the-carlo]

alas i am simply master bainting

[brothermonk-sam]

I have officially decided to not become a cantor or the chamberlain, I'm instead fighting the abbot to take charge of the monastery for all my evil whims

[brothermonk-sam]

april's jest!!

[brotherofburgundy]

I pray that these demons that influence your mind with such nasty lies may part you.

[brothermonk-sam]

i apologise

[monk-the-carlo]

i have achieved complete celibacy

[brotherhumphrey]

why is the confessional sticky? WHO has been having lollipops in here and not sharing them????

[monk-the-carlo]

erm

[monk-the-carlo]

@brothermayhew

[brothermayhew]

…….that is between us, i mean, me, and the lord

[monk-the-carlo]

i haveth been SAYING the ROOM is BETTER

[brotherhumphrey]

why is the confessional sticky? WHO has been having lollipops in here and not sharing them????

[monk-the-carlo]

erm

[monk-the-carlo]

@brothermayhew

[brotherhumphrey]

why is the confessional sticky? WHO has been having lollipops in here and not sharing them????

[monk-the-carlo]

erm

[hildegards-abbey]

It feels as though I shall never arrive to Farnham at this rate. Prithee send words of encouragement, I hath found myself in a strange land where the locals are eating snails and speaking in tongues! (What doth "wee wee" and "ou la la" mean?)

[monk-the-carlo]

a! mine first home! speak not of visions. they will think of naught but poppyseed intoxication

[hildegards-abbey]

many thanks, dear brother carlo, for the sound advice. I shall keep the many visions of onion soups and long loaves of bread to mineself

[monk-the-carlo]

long loaves of bread thou sayeth

[hildegards-abbey]

verily, the loaves are long and thick and crunchy perhaps? weighty. dost thou remember this? or hast thou experienced similar visions of long and thick breads

[monk-the-carlo]

i thhingk i hauve tge plague

[hildegards-abbey]

It feels as though I shall never arrive to Farnham at this rate. Prithee send words of encouragement, I hath found myself in a strange land where the locals are eating snails and speaking in tongues! (What doth "wee wee" and "ou la la" mean?)

[monk-the-carlo]

a! mine first home! speak not of visions. they will think of naught but poppyseed intoxication

[hildegards-abbey]

many thanks, dear brother carlo, for the sound advice. I shall keep the many visions of onion soups and long loaves of bread to mineself

[monk-the-carlo]

long loaves of bread thou sayeth

[hildegards-abbey]

It feels as though I shall never arrive to Farnham at this rate. Prithee send words of encouragement, I hath found myself in a strange land where the locals are eating snails and speaking in tongues! (What doth "wee wee" and "ou la la" mean?)

[monk-the-carlo]

a! mine first home! speak not of visions. they will think of naught but poppyseed intoxication

[sisterclaennis]

hear ye, hear ye! farnham inhabitants and tumblr users alike, i invite thee to vote for the farnham poetry competition's winning poem! please read the poems and cast thine vote.

entry one, by @hildegards-abbey

entry two, by @alex-apricus

entry three, by @monk-the-carlo

entry four, by @monkbrother-thomas

and finally, the fifth entry, by @monasterycat

now that thou hast read the entries, please vote for thine favourite!

whose poem do you think should win?

@hildegards-abbey

@alex-apricus

@monk-the-carlo

@monkbrother-thomas

@monasterycat

Voting ended onMar 29, 2025

the vote will be live for one week!

[sisterclaennis]

wouldst thou love me if i was a fish, be honest

[monk-the-carlo]

sincerely sister i would brobably attempt to fish and eat thou

[sisterclaennis]

some part of me is offended by this but in truth i cannot blame thee. however thou wouldst have to catch me first!

[monk-the-carlo]

for thine sake and with mine knowledge i pray that thine fish self and i never do cross paths