Degraded Forbidden Stimulation

Mindless Thoughts and a Music Journal about those thoughts

[monotonyandanxiety]

[monotonyandanxiety]

Night 20

Knowing when something has ended, is always an issue with me. I love to kind of overstay with people, because it’s a sort of comfort. Especially after everything ends is the worst. Looking back at past relationships or friendships is awful, because you know you can never go back to that. Whatever you had with that person ended the day I decided to fuck up. That chronic feeling of knowing you’re going to fuck up is the worst

Maybe tomorrow things will be different. But for now, all I can do is hope the next person i let get close to me I can finally choose to let in all the way.

[monotonyandanxiety]

Night 17

I’m alone and sad. 

[monotonyandanxiety]

The Last Shadow Puppets~Is This What You Wanted

@paullllrudd thought you might like this

[monotonyandanxiety]

Sitcom~Ginger Ale

[monotonyandanxiety]

Night Gaunts~Nights and Daze

[monotonyandanxiety]

Night Gaunts~Post Party Depression 

Thoughts to think about

[monotonyandanxiety]

The Good, the Bad, and the Queen~History Song

If you don’t know it now..

[monotonyandanxiety]

Alkaline Trio~Calling All Skeletons

feels the same that it’s always felt like 

[monotonyandanxiety]

yoo Needful Things is acapella. That’s awesome

[monotonyandanxiety]

Spirit Club - Slouch

GR023 Spirit Club Slouch Oct Friday October 21st Order limited edition color vinyl (3 color variants) at store.ghostramp.com GHOSTRAMP.COM

Holy hell the new album is gr8. Check it out!

[monotonyandanxiety]

Day 15

So far today has been mediocre, someone I want to talk to has been ignoring me the whole day which is always a shitty feeling, and I haven’t been doing much either. Some Highway Patrol paid for my lunch today, which I felt was nice, even more so since it was the first time that had happened and for it to be a highway patrol was awesome. 

I feel bored with life still, I haven’t quite found something that peaks my  interest and when I find even a spark of it, it disappears just as quickly as it arrived. I hope the future is better if I decide to be a part of it. I am very disillusioned which is so shit as I’m only 19, but I just feel like there’s nothing good for me out there. Which incidentally has yet to be proven wrong. School is also terribly boring but eh what can you do.  

[monotonyandanxiety]

Days N Daze~Misanthropic Drunken Loner

[monotonyandanxiety]

Fake Laugh~Kinda Girl

this song is so beautiful and more people should check it out. His voice is really calming and it has a soothing rhythm 

[monotonyandanxiety]

Night 14

Well, so far today has been a good day, I went out to have dinner with my parents, and I also met someone new today. But the reason this song was chosen for this is because I do still feel lonely and my depression doesn’t seem to be getting better. Sometimes I do wish things would change, but no matter how good things are on the outside I know I’ll always feel like shit. Even if I constantly fake it. I hope to one day just not give a shit though. Like i used to.

[monotonyandanxiety]

The Last Shadow Puppets~Is This What You Wanted(Cover)

ayy decent cover

[monotonyandanxiety]

Deakin~Golden Chords

This song is so hauntingly beautiful. Ugh I love it. It makes me want to let go of myself and just live and be happy. Of course easier said than done