paranoia.

alastor everett moody. kill the boy and let the man be born.

[sybilltrelxwney]

Uh-huh. A world full of skeptics. Sybill smiled and waved away his concern, hardly surprised by it. "I'm fine, Moody." She assured him, "I think I don't have all the pieces of a puzzle yet, is all. It's outside your scope, don't worry."

[moodythemad]

the lines in moody's forehead became more exaggerated as he frowned. the concept that anything could be outside his scope did not sit well with him. "I can see more than you think. maybe I can help. what sort of puzzles pieces are you looking for exactly?"

[xkilljxy-deactivated20240717]

There was a lingering moment, something tense and heated, before Cordelia finally pushed off the wall behind her and moved forward. Her hand was gentle and hesitant as it reached up and rested on his arm, and her entire body sagged a little as the mask covered face pressed lightly against his chest. "He said that love is killing me. I'm not sure if that's a clue or if that's Malcolm, even in death, being Malcolm." Her other arm lifted and wrapped around his middle, and for a moment, she was perfectly content to just stand there, body shaking a little with sobs that she wouldn't let out. "I'm sorry."

[moodythemad]

alastor did not hesitate to pull cordelia closer as she finally relented and approached him. two strong hands braced her back as she wept, stroking calm and patient lines down the length of her spine. "so how exactly would he know that? did he come to that conclusion himself? because I doubt love is what killed him." obsession, maybe. idolatry of a madman and the perceived amount of power that sycophant could provide. if he had any particular insight into the nuances of this exact generational curse due to his death, then why be vague and unhelpful about it for any other reason save that he was, of course, a raging narcissist? moody kissed the top of cordelia's head. "I would like to speak with him. are you alright with that?"

[bob-belcher]

[moodythemad]

@xavecamour

[sybilltrelxwney]

"Well if I knew that I wouldn't be missing it." She pointed out, sighing. "There's... Something. A person or- a concept, you know? Might be more about a mix of people, how their web spirals out. Bah, I do hate when things won't solidify."

[moodythemad]

"extrapolate. use the information you have to form a working conclusion." sybill continued to say nonsense. he furrowed his eyebrows. "are you unwell? have you hit your head?"

[xkilljxy-deactivated20240717]

"You know I have the same mark on my arm that he did." Her voice barely rose, but there was a new sharpness to it. Cordelia had always thought of herself as the type of person who had to act in self interest, who didn't have a net hanging below her to catch her if she slipped off a tightrope she never agreed to walk on. "We do things to survive. We take paths to get a leg up. There were nine of us growing up, all vying for a scrap of attention, he was just as damaged as I was. Differently, but just as." Perhaps it was easier to defend him now that he was a spirit shuffling cards in a dark room. She didn't move, something freezing her where she stood. Fear. Nerves. "I don't want you to watch me die. Either from this curse, or from fighting on the wrong side of a war. I'm scared, Alastor. Angry and bitter and scared. I don't want to drag you down with me. You know you have an out, right?"

[moodythemad]

"I also know you had the same parents, the same siblings, the same familiar blood in your veins, the same cheekbones, even the same house, but two very, very different lives." that was often how alastor had to look at his own brothers. there was so much time between the oldest three and himself that at times, it felt as though they shared a childhood he could not understand despite being counted among them. "duchess, your path still follow a fundamental base of decent morality. his did not. I understand he was your brother, but he had very few redeeming qualities. the differences far outweigh any damage you might think there is to share." moody did not know how to be comforting in this case. the line was drawn so very clear to him. cut and dry. black and white. cordelia was a good person. "I do not want or need an out, and you are not capable of dragging me down. I am done having that conversation, believe me or don't." his tone was even and measured, but filled with a certain anger. "do you think I am not scared? aren't you the one who tells me constantly how paranoid I am? the foe's glass, the locks, the traps, the wards, and the meticulous and calculated movements into the worst of the most dangerous wizards in the world are all an attempt to control that fear. that is the price you pay when you do the hard jobs; fear. but if you are so scared of death that you stop living your life in preparation for it, what is the point?"

[xkilljxy-deactivated20240717]

Cordelia was spinning her ring around on her finger again, watching as the blue shifted from visible to hidden and back again, afraid that the moment she looked up at him, she was going to crack, and considering the limited movement of her face behind this mask, worried that she would end up suffocating in it if she cried too much. "I don't think I'm going to get better." She finally admitted. "Malcolm died of the same... curse and I'm afraid he might be right and that I'm denying fate." Finally, she looked up, and had to blink a few times to clear tears away. "He also won at gin, so I'm a little steamed over that."

[moodythemad]

moody made the conscious decision not to cross his arms while they waited. "I know that. you have never thought you were going to get better. you are a textbook pessimist, duchess, and your brother died from fighting on the wrong side of a war. I firmly believe he has never been right about anything so to assume he would start now may mean your judgment is clouded by sentimentality." his voice remained sure footed and steady. alastor knew precisely where his opinion stood. he reached out and wiped away her tears with the knuckle of his index finger. "and he probably cheated. come here."

[xkilljxy-deactivated20240717]

Cordelia had a lot to think about. The ghost of her past sitting her down and demanding she think, really think, was a lot more than she had been prepared to handle, and the ideas that twisted and swirled around in her head now felt hollow and cold. It was icy water dousing a fire that had started to burn in her. It was misery wrapped in the kind of truth that she certainly didn't want to hear. The footsteps milling about around her as she rested back against the hallway wall just outside the door where her awful game had concluded, where she'd been standing for minutes or maybe hours, she didn't know, passed her by without much thought. But his gait was hard to miss, like she was attuned to his frequency. "I don't want to talk to you right now." She admitted it in a voice so quiet, it would be a wonder if he heard her. "You're too good at pulling things out and I haven't had the chance to properly process. Malcolm's in there, if you want to say hello."

[moodythemad]

moody frowned, but he did not say anything as he took a distant post from his obviously upset fiance as he approached. he did not need to say anything. there was no denying that he was a remarkably patient man. he could wait until she did want to talk again. it was important to take the time to reflect and sort out all those thoughts. moody had always believed in filing paperwork, and processing was the mental equivalent of that. it was good for her. "I don't." he said gently. "goodbye, maybe. let me know when you're ready."

[moodythemad]

where; on the way to outside smoking room with; cordelia || @xkilljxy

"there you are." alastor moody tapped his wand against his blue eye one against with an enchantment of his own craft. through the walls of this ominous opulence, he could now see outlines and silhouettes of those moving about inside. his brow furrowed as he saw some figures moving through the walls and floor instead. it reminded him of the hogwarts ghosts milling about unexpectedly. he locked onto the figure that he could recognize anywhere a floor above and started towards her.

[moodythemad]

chivalry.

[sybilltrelxwney]

Where: Somewhere pensive... With: open

"Do you ever feel as though you are blind to something just in the corner of your eye? And whenever you try to turn your head to catch it... You're too late?"

[moodythemad]

"yes." alastor said with a frown. "what do you think you are missing?"

[moodythemad]

where; lol idk i wanted to use this gif with; open

"go on. give it another tug. obviously it's working."

[moodythemad]

T H E M O O D Y ' S

@xkilljxy

[xavecamour]

"how about 'guy in mask'?" she sighed, holding her hand out for the rag. "please moody, I didn't see their face."

[moodythemad]

"height, weight, shoe size. give me anything you can remember." he paused long enough in his stitching to oblige her. "what did you see?"

[xkilljxy-deactivated20240717]

moodythemad​:

-

“and it will likely continue to work in my favor if I remain patient.” this time alastor returned a sly smirk then began eating, or rather, continued eating. “I’m not pig-headed.” he grumbled. pig-appetited maybe. “you do understand that we are not losing that future, right? we are just en route to it. the thing about the future is that it does take some waiting and planning. luckily, I excel at both. we are getting married. that is step one.” he explained. “no one else has a chance at me, but I will accept you staying alive out of pettiness and spite. eat.”

...

“You’re a touch pig-headed, darling, and saying you aren’t only furthers the notion that you are.” A sigh left her as she looked down at the plate of food again, and in a motion that felt practiced and almost natural, she picked up her fork and started moving the food around on her plate without actually bringing anything to her lips to eat. “We lose that future if I die. I always thought that I wasn’t afraid to die, until it became a very real possibility. And before you say anything, I know fundamentally that being afraid of dying doesn’t make me weak or whatever, but it feels weak.” She finally took a bite, but the food tasted like ash in her mouth as she chewed slowly, finally managing to get it down. “I didn’t have a chance at you a year ago and now we’re getting married. You’re hot, nearly the hottest person in all of England. It’s not insane to think that if I die, someone won’t try to come swoop in and snatch you up.”

[moodythemad]

moody continued to grumble unintelligibly as he finished his own plate. his eyes, however, remained steady on cordelia's plate until her fork finally punctured an actual bit and brought it to her mouth. he could hear his own father's voice saying 'eat it, son. don't push it around til it's cold. never waste food.' "being afraid of dying is the strongest possible decision you can make. people who are not afraid of dying have nothing worth living for, duchess. it is that fear which makes you keenly motivated to live. not eating does, in fact, make you weak. maybe you're starting to confuse the two." he said pointedly. "I think it tastes good, but would you prefer something else instead?" molly apparently had been dealing with some 'things' this week which meant he had a casserole, some meat pies, two baskets of muffins, and a tray of cookies in his usually untouched and sterile kitchen. "they probably would try, but that doesn't change anything. no one else has a chance at me." his voice was firm. "except you. you always did. alright?"

[moodythemad]

xkilljxy​

“You like how obnoxiously combative I am, it’s worked in your favor almost every time.” Once again, the grin of the playful and unafraid Cordelia reappeared, this time managing to linger as she reached over to lightly bump her knuckles against his chin. “It’s one of the reasons you fell for me.” Worry still plagued her nerves, crawling up in her chest and burrowing there like a very annoying worm, but Alastor certainly had a way of laying something out for her that helped ease some of that tension. “I suppose I never really thought about my future as something more than the abstract notion. I didn’t think I was going to fall for a stubborn, pig-headed jerk and want to have a quaint little life with him. I don’t want to lose… that future. Call me selfish, but I don’t want anyone else to ever have a chance to have you. If I die, I can’t guarantee that. For a stubborn, pig-headed jerk, you’re surprisingly lovable.”

-

“and it will likely continue to work in my favor if I remain patient.” this time alastor returned a sly smirk then began eating, or rather, continued eating. “I’m not pig-headed.” he grumbled. pig-appetited maybe. “you do understand that we are not losing that future, right? we are just en route to it. the thing about the future is that it does take some waiting and planning. luckily, I excel at both. we are getting married. that is step one.” he explained. “no one else has a chance at me, but I will accept you staying alive out of pettiness and spite. eat.”

[moodythemad]

xkilljxy​

“Of course you have.” There was a moment, brief as it might have been, where Cordelia came back into her own, teasing and playful, with a hint of mischief in her eyes before it dulled again with a sigh she forced out through her nose. “It might not last.” She finally admitted, staring down at her plate with mild distaste, the mere thought of food turning her already rolling stomach. “And I’m planning for a future, feeling a surge of confidence that could be ripped away at any second. And if I backslide again, do I even have the energy to fight anymore? And even if I don’t, then I have to live with guilt, because I’ve already lost two sisters and a brother to this, and it isn’t fair that they aren’t here and I am.”

-

alastor nodded. “it won’t.” he agreed. “nothing is made to last forever, though.” even the most masterful craftsmanship and carpentry had an expiration date. it was a reason you needed a constant vigilance to survive the ever changing landscape of the world. “we do the best we can while we can, duchess. when something changes, we adjust. that is always the line to walk. fear is only useful as a motivator. try not to let it stop you from advancing.” he placed the plate down in front of her. “eat.” he said again and starting making a plate for himself. “guilt should live with those at fault. survivor’s guilt is misplaced. you did not ask for this, and I have never known you to be anything except obnoxiously combative so forgive me if I have confidence in your moxie.”

[moodythemad]

xkilljxy​

It was almost pathetic the way that her stomach fluttered at the small gesture of affection, and melted some of the ice that had been creeping into her system lately. Cordelia had never been the warmest, but as time started to feel more limited, and days started to drag against her, walls had been building against everything and anyone who looked at her. “I haven’t been very hungry lately.” She admitted it quietly, looking almost ashamed, but slipping into a chair beside him at the table with a soft sigh. “I’m worried. I’m feeling better and that’s making me worried. Is that stupid?”

-

“I’ve noticed.” he said, although he didn’t need to. cordelia was perfect aware of how well his eyes worked, and how rare it was for alastor not to notice something. especially something about her; being, of course, his favorite thing to look at. he put an arm around her shoulder as she sat down. “no. it is never stupid to worry.” the reassurance was genuine coming from a man known for his paranoia. he began to serve a plate for her. “walk me through what specifically about feeling better worries you, duchess.”