be nice to nice

IG: binablazkova

[moogforlove]

I realized my worth. Finally.

[moogforlove]

We made love again. Made love. He told me he loved me, repeatedly, while we held the most intense eye contact.

Then pretended none of it happened in the morning while he poured himself a glass of wine and I started washing dishes with my tears.

We’re seeing Substance tonight, I love our little movie theater dates. Too bad the substance will linger outside the theater and it’s the only way we’ll be as close as our hearts desire.

Because our sober minds are too numb from all the pain.

Toxic lovers in all meanings.

[moogforlove]

Real love is having a fight and telling the person it was a mistake you two started talking again and then watching your favorite show together for “comfort”

[moogforlove]

He cried on my shoulder telling me I was right and then we fell asleep cuddling while I was playing with his hair

[moogforlove]

Real love is having a fight and telling the person it was a mistake you two started talking again and then watching your favorite show together for “comfort”

[moogforlove]

My whole room smells like him and I still feel the warmth of his hug even though he left yesterday. Guess this love will be my downfall after all.

[moogforlove]

The most painful break up is with the one you were never dating and you were never supposed to get attached to.

You still leave the bar together and end up in the same bed but.. goodnight kisses are now tight hugs and wiping each other’s tears. Morning sex exchanged for cuddling for hours and silent weeping.

I smoked my morning cigarette absorbing the sun and my favorite view which I always preferred with you by my side looking up at the stars.

Then I watched you pack my clothes in your backpack but couldn’t bring myself to take the lip balm I left on the shelf over my side of the bed or look for the hair clip I lost under the bed.

Then I put on my clothes, took my coat from the closet and left the house once again with “just” my best friend.

But nothing will be the same again.

[moogforlove]

We’re moving in together in a week.

[moogforlove]

Just to make another entry into my own personal void.

I’m moving out this Friday.

He told me he loved me again this morning in the middle of another make out session which should’ve never happened even though his kisses and touch feel so right. He’s back with his ex, that’s why it shouldn’t be happening.

I’m feeling all sorts of ways. I’m heartbroken and I’m feeling nostalgic smoking on the balcony and looking at the starts thinking about the Friday about three weeks ago when he decided it would be a great idea to lay in the middle of the road for hours looking up at the sky, when he kissed me and told me he loved me and it felt like the most romantic moment of my life until next morning when we were just friends again, thinking about all the nights we spent smoking in bed chugging wine cuddling and being ourselves because he’s the only one who made me feel safe enough to just be me, all the nights we spent watching our favorite shows on animal planet and all the days we slept in and watched mash until one of us had to get up. I packed his favorite pair of socks to move with me because they make me smile, he gave them to me to put them on one night when I had a mental breakdown when he held me in his arms until I fell asleep and woke me up with a smile saying it makes him happy when I wear his stuff. I miss the days we would go for walks in the woods and end up on the road stargazing because it was our thing. I miss all the days I would come over before I moved in just to cuddle in bed and enjoy each other’s company and all the late nights when we would text and tease each other to call an Uber and come over until one of us did. I already miss my best friend and most likely the love of my life. I already miss living here because this place felt like a home. Because of him.

Im also feeling so lost and confused. Why would he tell me he loves me, why would he cry on my shoulder telling me he’s sorry for what happened between us, telling me he doesn’t want me to move out, telling me with tears in his eyes he just wants me to know he tried so hard.

Why was I not good enough to keep then?

[moogforlove]

It’s been almost a year since I moved out and we never spoke to one another again. Until last night when he messaged me on the only platform where we didn’t block each other. He messaged me about the lady with a lot of bracelets from our favorite show. And the next morning he messaged me again. Sending me I Remember You by Ella Fitzgerald. And it’s all coming back suddenly.

[moogforlove]

Why are some guys so good at the boyfriend cosplay when u talk to them? Is it because they would actually be a good boyfriend and yall just met at the wrong time or is that honestly just a cosplay to make u think the first option?!

[moogforlove]

My psychiatrist will be so proud of me when I tell him that not only I finally have a new plug but I also tried completely new drug for the first time… so so proud 🥲

[farmlesbians]

horrible news guys…. i want to be in love

[blumencia]

[requiem-on-water]

Distortions by The Phantom Painter

[moogforlove]

Honestly I just feel like it’s not fair my life literally depends on antipsychotics and he gets to live his best life while still spreading lies about me

[moogforlove]

Sometimes I’m just sad and sometimes I’m my nickname on fb messenger with him is still a name of a fairy from a fairytale he made up when he stayed over at my place for the first time and we couldn’t fall asleep kind of sad

[moogforlove]

Note to self: mixing benzos and alcohol is very very bad

[moogforlove]

This week’s been an absolute joke on Monday I woke up in my ex situationship’s bed on Tuesday he texted me he’s done with me and that same day I met up with another ex situationship who I didn’t talk to for about four years and to top it all off I just got two tickets to Louis Tomlinson for free and I’m going to see him tomorrow I’m literally so confused

[moogforlove]

Is there anything more depressing than your best friend who grew up with parents who were both alcoholics telling you she hates to see you like “this” cause it reminds her of her childhood? I kinda don’t think so and I want to cry for the rest of my life

[moogforlove]

The most painful break up is with the one you were never dating and you were never supposed to get attached to.

You still leave the bar together and end up in the same bed but.. goodnight kisses are now tight hugs and wiping each other’s tears. Morning sex exchanged for cuddling for hours and silent weeping.

I smoked my morning cigarette absorbing the sun and my favorite view which I always preferred with you by my side looking up at the stars.

Then I watched you pack my clothes in your backpack but couldn’t bring myself to take the lip balm I left on the shelf over my side of the bed or look for the hair clip I lost under the bed.

Then I put on my clothes, took my coat from the closet and left the house once again with “just” my best friend.

But nothing will be the same again.

[moogforlove]

We’re moving in together in a week.

[moogforlove]

Just to make another entry into my own personal void.

I’m moving out this Friday.

He told me he loved me again this morning in the middle of another make out session which should’ve never happened even though his kisses and touch feel so right. He’s back with his ex, that’s why it shouldn’t be happening.

I’m feeling all sorts of ways. I’m heartbroken and I’m feeling nostalgic smoking on the balcony and looking at the starts thinking about the Friday about three weeks ago when he decided it would be a great idea to lay in the middle of the road for hours looking up at the sky, when he kissed me and told me he loved me and it felt like the most romantic moment of my life until next morning when we were just friends again, thinking about all the nights we spent smoking in bed chugging wine cuddling and being ourselves because he’s the only one who made me feel safe enough to just be me, all the nights we spent watching our favorite shows on animal planet and all the days we slept in and watched mash until one of us had to get up. I packed his favorite pair of socks to move with me because they make me smile, he gave them to me to put them on one night when I had a mental breakdown when he held me in his arms until I fell asleep and woke me up with a smile saying it makes him happy when I wear his stuff. I miss the days we would go for walks in the woods and end up on the road stargazing because it was our thing. I miss all the days I would come over before I moved in just to cuddle in bed and enjoy each other’s company and all the late nights when we would text and tease each other to call an Uber and come over until one of us did. I already miss my best friend and most likely the love of my life. I already miss living here because this place felt like a home. Because of him.

Im also feeling so lost and confused. Why would he tell me he loves me, why would he cry on my shoulder telling me he’s sorry for what happened between us, telling me he doesn’t want me to move out, telling me with tears in his eyes he just wants me to know he tried so hard.

Why was I not good enough to keep then?

[moogforlove]

I accidentally put on the coolest fit I have ever worn.. I’m literally wearing like bell bottom leggings cause my black jeans are in the wash, men’s black hoodie and thrifted leather blazer/jacket in the size xxl I literally just stole from one of my closest friends (also fucked up pair of old skool vans) also just had like three lines in the middle of a bar am I like the definition of a cool kid in 2004 or what