Days-gone-by

[moon-shunk]

Mute 7/25/2019

I keep calling out; yelling for someone to help me.

For someone to save me.

Everytime they call, i come running.

No matter the time or what i am doing, they are more important.

Yet here i am screaming, begging, and crying, yet no one answers or swoops in to pick me up off my feet.

Am i really so worthless? So beyond help that they cannot even be bothered to even pick up the phone?

Now that i gave everything i have, all they wanted, i am no longer needed?

No longer wanted?

I thought there were my friends, my family.

I am drowning, choking on terrible thoughts, and i need help.

Why can't they hear me? Why won't they help me?

-Vim

[moon-shunk]

Emptiness

Over the years, I have felt this hole in my chest. I thought if I ignored it, faught it, kept it burried, it would go away.  Now, it consumes me. It has become all I can think about; all I can feel. The only emotions I can feel are anger, loneliness, and minor moment of joy. I have loss all intrest in things that I used to love and there is no modivation to fix it. I am tired of trying to fix things; tired of trying to fix myself. I am becoming this “hole”, this emptiness. 

- Vim 

[moon-shunk]

6-7-2017

Why now? I'm all grown up. I've started my own life, started building a place for myself. Suddenly, you want to be apart of that. I used to jumped through hoops to get your attention. All I wanted as a child was for you to want me, to be apart off my life. Now, here we are and you say you want to be a father, my father? You claim you always wanted to be apart of my life, to be my dad, but you never seemed to have tried. I was never good enough then so what changed? What did I do to make you want me? Was it because I stopped wanting you, stopped trying to get you to look at me? To notice me? Do I have something you want? Why now and not then? - -Vim