told my boyfriend (who met me while i was about to transition and made me realize i wasnt a lesbian let alone a transgender) about all my trauma and he applies bits and pieces of it to the way he takes care of me and i love it so much. ive realized that shame is a big trigger for me and can stir up alot of internal feelings which leads me to become bratty and unfocused and combative. i dont like to be told im doing wrong. i dont like not getting my way. and when that happens theres a big possibility that i could lose myself to my feelings and completely act out. He takes me by my arm or wrist, holding it slightly up so im on my tippy toes, and leads me. that alone humbles me a bit and makes me feel so small. he scolds me, calling me a bad girl saying my feminine name and telling me he sees why my father dealt with me while he roughly pulls down my panties wrapping the tail of my shirt up in his large fist. He spanks me good and hard over his knee still scolding me. Each cheek at a time. Then in the middle between both. i love his hand. its much larger than my fathers. much stronger. so when he spreads my thighs and spanks my pussy it sends electricity through my body. He growls for me to be still as he spanks my clit and my eyes slam shut. He rubs my back as he tells me i will obey him. He tells me he’s not weak like my father. He tells me he’s gonna take care of me how my daddy did. His thick fingers massaging my clit as he tells me he’s my daddy now. He asks me am i his special girl and as overwhelmed as i am i blurt out yes. I want to be his special girl. forever. the shame of whats happening is overriding my self respect. i feel like a little girl again. a guilty little 11 year old girl getting a strange punishment from her father. panties around my ankle, thighs spread, soft feminine butt stinging while he covers my mouth and rubs his two thick fingers against my young needy clit. the shame in growing to need that same “care” in my adult relationships.
origamiaround
germansingergirl
prguitarman
