D e a r D i a r y

Messy feed 🌷

[nothingspecialjustasoul]

It kills me inside when I think I have to act cold to protect myself knowing I'm the sweetest and clingiest soul you'd ever meet.

[surqrised]

“Everybody has a chapter they don’t read out loud.”

— Unknown

[5ner]

[mryhrnndzhs]

Sometimes I sit awake in the middle of the night while the whole world sleeps. The house is quiet, the lights are dim, and it’s just me and this tiny life that needs me. I don’t always feel happy about the sleepless nights, and I’m not exactly sad either. It’s just a strange, quiet space where motherhood feels the most real when no one is watching, no one is helping, and love simply keeps showing up even when I’m tired.

[mryhrnndzhs]

[remanence-of-love]

[esoteric-snob]

Lo se.

[nothingspecialjustasoul]

[remanence-of-love]

[jul-27]

e.

[mryhrnndzhs]

[vexheart]

[mryhrnndzhs]

Hi, self.

It’s been a while since we last posted here. Remember when we said we were going to have a baby soon? To the person I once had an LDR with… and now I’m married to. Hehe. Time really flies.

I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Anya, on December 21, 2025, via C-section. Since then, life has been a roller coaster of emotions and happiness.

The newborn phase is truly a hell of a ride—so tiring, draining, and exhausting. Yet somehow, our hearts feel fuller than ever. There are days we feel moody, overwhelmed, even angry, and I often feel guilty about that. But I’m learning that all of this is part of becoming a mother.

We’re almost two months postpartum now. I’m still recovering while learning how to take care of this tiny human. My husband has been amazing and is back at work now. Sometimes I miss the old us—the quieter days—but this is our new chapter, our new version of us.

There’s a little peanut who depends on us completely now. To her, we are her whole world. And we’re doing our best every single day to nourish her with love, patience, and care.

We’re feeling everything—the good and the bad. And I’m grateful for every inch of this new world we’re living in. I pray that our baby and my husband stay healthy always. I’m also so thankful that my mama is here with us, taking care of her very first grandchild.

This is us. Tired, emotional, imperfect—but so full of love.

[imagination]

[1000drawings]

[vanish]

[adoribly]

//

[mryhrnndzhs]

Hi self. Guess what? We are having a baby!! It's been 3 years since we waited for this moment. I pray that everything will go well. Insha'Allah.

[mryhrnndzhs]

Hi it's been a while, life has been good lately. 🩷

We are happy self, we've been taking care properly. Everything is great even though we have some problems sometimes. Right now we are dealing with infertility but all is well don't worry. We are working on it. Keep fighting, keep on surviving. Just like before everything will come into place. insha'Allah 🙏🏻

[mryhrnndzhs]

Yes we are back for not wanting to exist a 100% sure again.

No more overthink, no more worries just wanna be gone.