belated notice !
this blog will be kept on archive, if youâd still like to continue threading with hana or keep in contact, feel free to follow @dearestsuki and unfollow this blog as it may be repurposed in the future.
Acquired Stardust

blake kathryn
almost home

Andulka

tannertan36
KIROKAZE

pixel skylines
ojovivo

Discoholic đȘ©

if i look back, i am lost
NASA
Aqua Utopiaïœæ”·ăźćșă§èšæ¶ă玥ă

⣠Chile in a Photography âŁ
art blog(derogatory)
Three Goblin Art

Kiana Khansmith
DEAR READER
wallacepolsom

Kaledo Art
RMH

seen from Australia

seen from United States
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seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Greece
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
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seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Argentina

seen from Argentina
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seen from Poland
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@msuhana
belated notice !
this blog will be kept on archive, if youâd still like to continue threading with hana or keep in contact, feel free to follow @dearestsuki and unfollow this blog as it may be repurposed in the future.
chaeyoungâ.
water.
chaeyoung doesnât typically remember many of her dreams, except for this time when sheâs suddenly in her childhood home. sheâs got to be only about eleven years old, and her father â god, she hadnât seen that face in ages â towers over her. the look on his face is angry.Â
his mouth is moving and thereâs a voice coming out of it, but chaeyoung canât recognize it as her own mother tongue. her mother is nowhere to be found. she begins to cry, because the tone from her father is beginning to grow more terrifying the more he escalates. as his tempers in her dream grows, so does chaeyoungâs age; by the time heâs screaming in her face, sheâs back to twenty-one years old.Â
but even adults cry, and so does she. he tortures her in her dream, not letting go of past traumas to let her just wake up. her mind keeps her trapped in the cycle until she finally finds her own voice to scream at him to JUST SHUT UP ALREADY â
water.
she doesnât feel herself nudged, but chaeyoung sits herself up in bed unprompted and still half asleep. water. water. water. sheâs absolutely parched after having forgot to drink some before sheâd passed out. it takes her only moments to realize where she is â a safe haven, thankfully, hanaâs room â before she turns her heavy lidded gaze to the blurry form beside her, assuming is her friend. âi need water.â
itâs laughable, but understandable.
out of all the things chaeyoung could have said the moment she woke up -- hana should have been prepared to hear that. however, she wasnât so she moves on command ; reaching for a cool bottle from her roommateâs fridge before tossing it onto the bed for chaeyoung to take. in the span of ten minutes, she feels her body feel as heavy as a brick at the bottom of the ocean.
she should have known just a sip of that potion wouldnât get rid of her nastiest of ails. wishful thinking at best. ( though, she did have the potion to thank for releasing her from the frustrating clutches of a headache )
taking a seat at the edge of her bed, she glances at chaeyoung, already beginning to assess the other for any signs of a hangover -- the last thing hana needed was chaeyoung feeling nauseous and ruining her sheets. âhow are you feeling? do you need to barf?â eyebrows knit together, hand reaching towards the basin by the side of her desk just in case. her priorities are, more or less, obvious -- get chaeyoung sorted out, then nag her to hell later. however, none of that would be possible if chaeyoung ends up vomiting her guts on her pretty ralph lauren sheets.Â
perfection emulated
jamie.
[ ... ]
TW VIOLENCE
she should be used to this, shouldnât she?Â
her life spent in an infinite loop of cho ahyoungâs design -- never once has it gone out of sync. again and again, perfection emulated to the best of her ability ; but of course, nothing was ever enough for cho ahyoung. not especially when the person who emulates, in vain, is of her own flesh and blood.Â
hana tries, 99.9% does she succeed, the lone 0.1% never comes without consequence. itâs twisted, hana thinks, but in a way -- she knows her mother only does this because she loves her. right? there could be no other reason outside of love -- even if it pains hana in the seconds after that love is thrown, smashed, crashing into her enough that it takes her breath away and sheâs faint for all but a moment as she tries to regain her bearings. she feels the pain, itâs sudden, a barreling of nerves that spark every painful receptor in her axis.Â
Yves in #378 âŁïž
life of the party
seleneâ.
the library was ever imposing; perhaps even more now that it feels so eerily empty. selene remembers the first time she had ever stepped foot in this space and the way she almost cried over the texts she had to read. her somewhat lack of intellect means she had to make it up with a grave amount of effort to ensure that she will not fall out of the ladder. this entails an ungodly amount of hours spent pouring over texts and paper in the library in the four years that she had spent in this university.
it feels wickedly rewarding that at this very moment, she came here with no other purpose than to bring her friend out. she ought not to feel so giddy over the prospect of not needing to study but she isâshe really is.
selene throws her friend a pointed look which is decidedly very uncharacteristic. in this equation, it was hana whose eyes can make even the devil cry tears of surrender. or perhaps she was just being overdramatic. âbecause,â she starts. âyou should be there with me dancing and drinking instead of reading these books. the readings can wait, hana. the party will only be here tonight.âÂ
leaning closer, she picks up one book with the premise of pretending to read it only to glance at the cover, holding onto it tightly to keep it on her side. away from hanaâs reach. âno youâre not. youâre just saying that so i can leave you in in peace but i wonât. you have to give me a really good reason to leave.â she says so with a smile. selene recognises that she might be the most annoying person in the world right now to the other girl but unsurprisingly, she finds that she is quite fine with that.Â
âthatâs what we have magic for, silly.â pulling her wand out from the pocket she made sure to have in the skirt she was wearing, she waves it around noncommittally. âthink of a character and we can hunt through the clothes you already have to make something. if not, we have this nifty little device to make quick work of it.â to emphasise her point, selene conjures up a fluffy coat matching the colour of her clothes with a quick wave of her wand. putting it around herself, to feel snug and covered. for the time being.
âjust say those sweet, sweet words, hana. iâm at your disposal here.â she grins.
oh, how the tables have turned.Â
âhm --â a thoughtful hum pricks her lips upwards even more, as if seriously considering the otherâs words. if not, amusing her a bit before her eyes are drawn and her smile is gone, coined for a fitted line to press her full lips together. âyou say this,â her nose wrinkles, âbut you and i both know there will be another party next week, no matter if it was a holiday or not.â it was no secret that the more scandalous of activities werenât exactly a rarity at mokseong. avoiding them, however, had become something akin to a speciality on hanaâs part.Â
âlet me guess -- bippity boppity boo?â she rolls her eyes, fingers finally receding from the curl of her jaw to close her book. it was obvious no more studying would be done -- not when selene was being this insistent. there was no stopping a woman with an agenda -- and it seemed clear what seleneâs was for the night. âwill the magic run out at midnight too?â she says, a laugh at the tip of her tongue -- almost hoping it would be so. maybe then she wouldnât feel as guilty skipping out on her studies like this.
she leans back in her chair, pushing aside her book to draw her sights on her current outfit -- a billion thoughts flitting through her mind on the search for a costume. she wasnât necessarily creative, if anything -- much like the rest, hana would probably just derive such a fit from a character sheâd seen in a movie. that being said, she just had to choose who.
âdo you remember that pink-haired girl from the movie we saw last week? what was her name again --â she frowns, eyes snapping to the otherâs, already taking in the sight of her expression ; practically feeling the elation spreading in the room as hana gave into the whims of temptation a little too easily.Â
nasty pumpkin
with @msuhanaâ
this is a first for gwen. she has only painted pumpkins for halloween but not carving them from scratch. an hour before the session, she had already looked up on ideas that are different from the classic evil looking face. so there she is, focused on carving out the perfect face for her masterpiece. a swish of her wand wouldâve done the job for her but by doing it manually throughout the carving process gives her a sense of satisfaction and achievement.Â
she pulls out the last cut-out piece that is suppose to be the âmouthâ, giving a proud smile before peeking over to see hanaâs pumpkin. âwhat are you carving?â gwen asks curiously while lifting her pumpkin and places it on her lap, its face facing the other. âhow would you rate this out of five rotten tomatoes?â
it was odd the things muggles did -- if not, slightly mundane.Â
not that hana minds them either way -- it was always nice to try something new. a first for everything was usually quite rare in her book -- sheâs lived long enough to try most things, lived long enough to realize most things did not need to be tried. however, she sits here -- digging her serrated knife deeper into the flesh of the pumpkin ; itâs heady smell has her grimacing. it wasnât disgusting -- but it wasnât pleasant either. if her mother knew she was wasting her time carving pumpkins, she probably would have dug the knife into something less vegetative.Â
âmmm,â she hums, hearing gwen from her side before turning to look at the other ; she had seen the examples earlier but she still wasnât sure what she was supposed to be making. the more she dug her knife into the gourd, the more it seemed she was cutting off more than necessary. at this point it looked like her pumpkin had a huge gaping hole in it. âiâm not sure -- i thought i was making it look like a face, but ... why is the hole so big?â her eyes turn to the pumpkin in gwenâs hands before raising an eyebrow, âit looks judgemental, i give it a four.â
đđđđ đđđ đđđđ đđđđđđđ.
  she canât help it. she brings her solo cup to her lips, leaving crimson stains in their wake, and takes a gulp of whatever poor taste alcohol she had poured herself. her face sours and a shiver runs down her spine. this was no fun.Â
  of course not the drinking part, that was certainly enough to keep her moderately entertained. but where was the party? no one was doing stupid shit blake could join in on and she was dying to get something started. where was the fun in being drunk, alone, and bored? especially on halloween.
  dark eyes scan the hoard of bodies, searching for a familiar face, something anything to keep her entertained. and there she awaits.
  her pink wig makes her stick out like a sore thumb, but there was no denying how blake loved the look on her. it was oddly fitting. she approaches with mostly pure intentions, looking forward to the challenge that was riling up cho hana for a wild night.Â
  now, this was entertaining.Â
   âtrick or treat~â she sings with a grin, arriving at the womanâs side promptly and treating her with a wink. not even giving hana time to conjure up a response, blake is already shoving her own drink into her hand. âyay, okay - hereâs your treat. drink up, itâs strong but the burn only lasts for like a few seconds.â   ââ     ïŸÂ  đđđ đđđđââââ   ă
at a glance, hana knows she doesnât belong here.
she is old books, eyes straining against dim lighting as fingertips brush at word after word -- quiet nights piling up until her brain short-circuits and another cup of coffee is needed to repeat the process.Â
she is cho hana : perfectionist on a pedestal not of her own design -- cho ahyoungâs perfect trophy daughter to be set on a shelf, to be seen -- not heard. she is not cho hana : a girl in the midst of gyrating, sweaty bodies and the smell of alcohol on the tongue ; barely dressed with a touch of a stumble in her heels.
she is none of these things, however -- halloween changes people, apparently.
selene is off somewhere ( so much for not leaving her behind, hana rolls her eyes ) ; having so much as brought her and thrown as much alcohol into the girl that she could physically manage before disappearing into the night. not that hana could have expected any less -- the party was in full swing , personal space amiss. that by the time the devil, himself, comes sidling up to her -- hana has to groan at who has dug their claws into her. if anything, as much as she loved blake -- meeting her at a party was probably hanaâs worst nightmare.
kiss goodbye the thought of coasting through the party slightly sober.Â
when blake was around, hana knew any semblance of normalcy would be ceased. the sight before her brings a furrow to her brows ; hands immediately trying ( and failing ) to push the drink that was immediately falling into her hands. she groans, once -- but alas, ever the people-pleaser, she downs the drink ; feeling her face twist in disgust the moment the liquor hit her tongue. âwhy does it taste more like a trick instead?â she frowns, already pushing the empty cup back into the otherâs hands, as if to say enough. her eyes take a brief scan of blake before feeling her own surprise color her visage.Â
âdid you just get here -- how are you not drunk yet?âÂ
flattery
excessive, misleading praise given under the whims of intoxication. see also: hana and @msuxhamin, mokseongâs halloween party, and what happens when you pair powerful alcohol and delicious flattery.Â
she feels a nonchalant lull sink deep into her veins.Â
it keeps her afloat on a wave of numbness ; the tingling feeling in the pit of her stomach distracts her from the constant static lain privy to a girl who was so used to being wound so tight. tonight should have been no different -- yet, she feels the burn from her last drink scald her throat as it warms her cheeks -- the night wanes to different endeavors opposite of worn books.Â
a residual flush clears from her cheeks to her very nape as she tosses the empty cup that had last been shoved into her hands by blake or selene ( at this point, sheâs lost count how many sheâs had -- an idea of who was supplying her her alcohol, now, also a bit fuzzy ) ; it was so irresponsible, something hana by no other definition was not.
cho hana being irresponsible? it was practically unheard of.Â
but she stands, slightly unsteady on her feels -- pink wig slightly askewed as she rhythmically sways to the thrill running up and down her arms ; the erratic thump of edm beats in time with the heavy weight of her heart, urging her further down the depths of a sea she couldnât quite pull herself out of. the thrill pulls inhibition and instinct forward ; leaving rhyme and reason for tomorrowâs regrets. just like how her arms pull her into one of a boy sheâs seen a handful of times -- what was his name again? ah -- âhamin-ah~â her voice rings out a little too affectionately for their positions ; she barely knows him. but her fingers curl into his fit, tip-toeing up to poke his nose with a soft laugh. âyouâre so cute? do you know that? have the other sophomores told you that yet -- no?â she gasps, as if it physically hurt her that no one sought the same thoughts as she regarding the otherâs appearance. âthat just wouldnât do -- you have to know how delicious you look!âÂ
her fingers trail against his cheek before curving his jaw ; the same, offshoot of a grin on her lips as she watches the way her fingers dance a little too affectionately -- a little too intimately to a boy she barely spoke more than five words to prior. âif i wasnât so thirsty, i think i would have eaten you right up!â
CHO HANA AS ALICEÂ FROM CLOSER, 2004 .
life of the party
seleneâ.
long, dark locks swishes behind her as she walks through the walls of the castle. the pink barrette that completes the costume keeps everything neatly in placeâwell, that, and the charm she had to place in order to remain polished throughout the events of the night. it was not always that the young prefect would be seen in such a tip-top shape; dressed in a pretty shade of pink with much to see and her face decked in such a glamorous makeup that only her magical abilities could conjure. simply put, sheâs dressed for the party.
the one night where she does not have to flip open a page in her book without feeling guilty. it makes for one hell of a celebration.
yet before she can bring herself to enter the premises, it was as though a siren called out to her and led her heeled feet to the direction of the library instead. ah, the only place in the world that she can love and hate at the same time. when she pushes open the large doors, selene was not surprised to find the other side completely bereft of students. it seems even the librarian was nowhere to be found. perhaps mister kim was actually enjoying the festivities unlike this one person she knows.Â
âi knew it!â the suseong student whispers, the sound of her voice still permeating through the empty air. the click-clack-click of her heels reverberates through the room as she walks closer to her friendâs table. âhello? what are you doing here? thereâs actually a party in full swing right now and here you are still studying. werenât we just here yesterday?â she thinks hana has completely gone off the bend but she cannot exactly blame her. at the very least, she just wants to take her out of it every chance she gets.
she slides on the seat across the other girl; her usual spot when they go on their back-breaking, tears inducing, and anxiety filled study sessions. âhey. iâm not studying right now, it should be fair that you arenât too.â she smiles. âitâs just one night. come on!âÂ
hana is nothing if not resilient.
if she reads another sentence over, sheâll do it again -- and again and again until the words are swimming in her vision in a mess of words. theyâre dizzying but she does it again, and again and again until her head aches. her eyes strain against the fine print but this is how it goes -- she tires herself more and more until sheâs stuffed herself full for the night.Â
itâs exhausting.
just when she sought for some semblance of rest ; fate grants her a pardon in the form of long legs and tempting words. too tempting as selene comes in a vision of pink and sparkles that make the very stars hana had seen on her way over to the library pale in comparison. the sight calls upon the slightest lift of her lips in an upturned smirk, subtle as the furrow in her brows take further command of her expression. huh? -- oh. seleneâs words arenât loud, but they make enough of presence in the emptiness of the room. hollow walls make for the best sound amplifiers, after all.Â
her eyes roll at the question thrown her way, eyes pointedly direct her gaze to the book in front of her. âand that should matter because?â her chin rests on the palm of her hands, finger tapping at her jaw as she gazes at selene lazily, a small pout forming on her lips as the otherâs words begin to make themselves known. âiâm not really in the mood for a party, though, sel.â
even if she says it -- a part of her knows it isnât true. a better, more damning part tells her she shouldnât be here wasting her life away. but another more fearful one keeps her rooted. itâs a toss -- she can feel the last of her restraint slipping, seleneâs words sound too tempting -- a mere hush of seduction that triggered every last reserve hana had thought she had against the whimsicals that were the ( much needed ) escape the other was offering on a silver platter. they were so wistful, lustful in their approach that if hana squinted, she could see herself falling for it.
but, she sighs -- fingers pricking at the edges of her bookâs pages. a smile plays with her lips before itâs immediately stamped down by her small groan. âand what am i supposed to go as? iâm obviously not dressed for a party.â though -- that was probably the least of her problems.Â
if anything, hana could possibly charm herself something. worst case scenario, she could also tear her oxford shirt and call it a night.
perfection emulated
TW VIOLENCE, VERBAL ABUSE, CURSING
a person who is the embodiment of perfection (correction: sheâs almost -- but never enough, never is it enough) . see also: hana and @jamiemsuâ in the aftermath of the storm that is hanaâs mother, cho ahyoung. otherwise known as, cho ahyoungâs disappointment: enter cho hana. CIRCA SEPT, 2020
itâs fucked up, isnât it? she thinks, with a taste of bitterness on her tongue. how easily her expectations quickly become reality. a part of her thinks she should have known -- another, more wistful part of her hoped her mother wouldnât -- pleaded that sheâd ignore it. alas, the moment the results had been announced, like clockwork -- her mother comes into her room, disrupting the very peace hana had so carefully built for herself. her presence breeds fear easily enough, filling in the gaps between her veins, very nearly stealing the air in the room the moment the door hits its hinges and hana is deserted with the lion in its den.Â
âhello, mother.âÂ
her smile is strained -- stiff, it hurts as it cuts into her cheeks.Â
life of the party
a person who is the center of attention, or in hana's case lack thereof. see also: hana and @msuselene and the tribulations selene goes through to get hana to go to ( one ) party instead of studying her saturday night away.Â
halloween is nothing but trivial in hanaâs eyes.Â
it will come and go much like the days before and exactly like the days going forward. itâs useless to waste energy on such an irrelevant holiday, she thinks, holding her books close to her chest ; lonely steps sound heavy, following her amongst the shadows that dance in the corridor. orange hues trapeze after her with the fading of idle chatter ; an eerie reminder of the wall she has so unremarkably erected between herself and the others. she ignores the itch that trembles in her fingers, opting to pull her books tighter into herself as she reaches her destination.Â
the doors are heavy but fall shut to a deafening silence. the mere entrance has the lights from above flickering ; even her sigh sounds out of place in the quiet room. unsurprisingly, hana is the only one there. it was halloween, after all, and it looked like everyone but hana seemed to favor such a holiday.
alas, this was just how it was meant to be.Â
( it wouldnât do her good to dwell on things like that, anyways, she tells herself -- convinces herself, seemingly )
taking a seat at her regular table, a well-lit corner of the library, hidden by the walls of books that she usually gathered around her, she opens her passages she had brought with her -- ready to review them once more for the exams to be held in the upcoming weeks. she already had received her motherâs reminder on the dot -- a painstaking cue to âget her act together or elseâ was an underlying tone to the owl. it had startled hana to the core and for a moment, she could feel the ache in her cheek begin to swell.Â
it acts up again ( despite how much she wills it away ) --Â
so she breathes once through her nose, and out through pursed lips -- then again. a repeated notion that continues until sheâs calmed herself and fingers press into literature, eyes on the lines that have already begun to imprint themselves into her memory. here goes another day of the same olâ thing.Â
Yves dancing to âSirenâ
THE CHILLING ADVENTURES ... PLOTS
this is tragically late pls forgive me
hana isnât really a party person, so sheâll probably be studying, your museâs job is to get her to the party !!! they could chance upon her somehow ( tbd! ) and convince her to stop knocking parties and her life away and instead party the night away. she doesnât have a costume but your muse can help her come up w a costume ( canon: her costume is going to be a last minute rendition of mia wallace from pulp fiction! ) taken by selene!
hana had actually been at the outdoor theatre at the beginning of the evening but the feeling of unproductivity kind of irked her ; so much so that she probably could have blown up at someone if they so much as looked her way for no reason, could that person be you?
could have had an earlier altercation in the beginning of the day on halloween, could have ended with hana scoffing at your muse for being SO INTO halloween but turns out hana ended up going to the party and ... does she look like sheâs enjoying herself??? introducing your muse gloating and telling her âi told you soâ or donât because hanaâs now glaring at you and oh my god is her hand about to go for your throat???
anyways itâs halloween, hana is actually kinda feeling herself, lets get her into mischief!
someone whoâs judging hanaâs outfit and hana is Not here for it
hana isnât an emotional drunk, sheâs not even a touchy-feely drunk, but she is a happy drunk -- which is weird considering sheâs usually so stoic and fake smiles ; so maybe your muse picks up on that weird contrast???
hana swears she knows the school like the back of her hand ( sheâs been there for 4 years, so it should come expected ) however, as the school dresses itself up for halloween, she finds herself lost in the great hall and in the maze of mirrors ?? things can only get worse as hana begins to panic and oops is that a fist flying into her reflection or to your face?
someone please drag hana to the haunted house where sheâll probably scream her head off because sheâs not exactly good with things that go bump in the night
hana is definitely the drunk girl complimenting people out of nowhere ( come tomorrow morning thatâll be a different story ) taken by hamin!
sheâs here for stolen kisses, her raising her voice and oooooh skin showing!
letâs just have a good time full of lots of things hana can just be extremely embarrassed and regretful for in the morning!
edit! jk hana is going as alice for halloween đ€Ș
budding parallels
similar but not quite the same, virtually so; but hopefully, not at all. see also: hana and @msumaliaâ and the similarities that bind them, and the differences that hana wishes were enough.Â
truth be told, hana sees a great deal of herself in malia. ( whether that was a good thing or not was to be decided ) where they differ, however, falls short of expectation. ( not that that was a bad thing, perse, if anything, hana thought it was for the best ) if she could wish anyone to be more unlike her, sheâd think that grace should fall upon the best souls sheâs witnessed. and while sheâs not one for auras, hana thinks malia may have the best of them. she finds malia soft where hana isnât -- an innocence, untainted, she holds so dear that hana canât fault her for it.Â
she finds it endearing, instead.Â
but alas, the qualities she sees in malia are ones she doesnât wish for her. not in someone so sweet and so new to the world -- sheâs heard the stories of the incoming freshmen, privy ears to gossip as any one with a sense would be. and she finds the new toseong students all a little green in the ears and sparkly in the eyes.Â
so, it comes to no surprise when one of hana professors asks if sheâd like to take anyone under her wing -- and usually, hana wouldnât -- but she relents, âitâs just for the time being to help them get used to the schoolâ they had said and hana isnât one to argue. so, with a smile on her face she takes the name and reads it over, once, twice -- three times for good luck -- before slipping it into her pocket right before the seat beside her is taken at lunch. hana doesnât think much of the acquaintance, if anything -- she supposes, maybe this would be good for her.
staying cooped up in the library was not doing her complexion any favors.Â
apples to apples
quidditch practice or tutoring session on gravity? see also: hana and @msukevinâ on the quidditch grounds, seemingly engaged in a tutoring session, otherwise seen as hana chucking apples at kevinâs head.
hana isnât sure whatâs worse: her aim or kevinâs inability to comprehend a thing sheâs said in the last ten minutes while in mid-air.Â
if anything, she was certain it had something to do with how air depletes in density the higher you climb. the higher you go, the less oxygen to the brain -- or something like that. all hana knew was that, the more he climbed with each apple she catapulted via charms into the air, the more he was answering her less and less and hana wasnât sure if she should be worried or annoyed.
hadnât it been his idea to get out of the library on the promise that she would still be able to tutor him?
while, sure, a day in the sun afforded her a nice, glowy tan -- hana could do without the ache in her legs from standing and the crick in her neck from looking up at the other. ( and there was no way in hell sheâd get onto another broom -- no thank you, one time was enough ) the longer this dragged on, the more she found the flaws in the plan -- execution definitely falling short of expectations as she now dug her heels further into the ground and crossed her arms ; a frown dutily set into a line as she stared at him from where she stood at ground zero.Â
another apples charms itâs way into her hand, loosely tossed up and down before itâs flung once more into the air, direction more or less aimed at the otherâs head this time to get his attention upon her once more. âif i didnât know any better, iâd think coming out here was a waste of time.â she says, the monotonous drawl of her voice flattening into a sigh ; her hand raises to shield her eyes from the sun as she gazes at the boy staying afloat. âshall i leave? -- i doubt the air quality is doing any favors to your brain right now.â Â