pairing: bob reynolds x f!reader (thunderbolts/mcu)
rating: T
word count: 2,261
summary: inspired by opalite by taylor swift. bob doesn't think he's ever experienced pure happiness, not until he met you.
A/N: the next installment of my showgirls series! i've been writing a lot for bob on my own since seeing thunderbolts (lewis pullman the man that you are) and once i have more i plan to share a little series i've been working on featuring a stark!reader. i just want to make sure i can commit to finishing it knowing i've been so in and out of writing the last couple years. but if anyone is interested let me know, and i hope to have more out this fall! and i hope you enjoy my first bob work here! xo
showgirls masterlist
"shelter here with me, my love"
Bob isn’t sure he’s ever known what it’s meant to be truly happy.
There were moments in his life where he’s sure he’s experienced it - fleetingly. Perhaps a birthday before his childhood home became infiltrated with toxicity. Maybe a moment amongst friends that’d been drowned out by the drugs in his system at the time. But his circumstances have not provided much room for bliss, gleefulness, or even feeling content.
When he met the Thunderbolts, he found himself having more moments of levity. But there was still an ache that lingered, that reminded him at any time he could slip. Back into old habits, old memories…and The Void could take over again.
At some point, when he was way too young to be so cynical, he’d accepted the fact that he may not be destined for a normal or peaceful existence. That he would suffer in some way for the rest of however long his life would be. He would just have to find a way to live with it all; and he never even considered another person would want to deal with his baggage by his side.
Maybe it was the lack of familiarity with the concept, or deep, deep denial, but at some point that ache starts to dissipate, becoming less noticeable. And because he doesn’t realize it, he doesn’t attribute it to anything right away. Or anyone.
Bob couldn’t deny you were his favorite member of the team. He and Yelena had formed a sibling-like bond, Bucky was a mentor-figure, and even he and Walker begrudgingly warmed up to one another. But you were something else. Your warmth and optimism in spite of the trauma you’ve been through was admirable, and Bob was drawn to it.
They’d been at the tower for just over a month the first time the two of you were the only ones to stay back from a mission. Bob was used to keeping himself entertained on his own, but you asked him if he’d wanted to binge watch a show. You were making your way through the sitcom genre, your choice of “comfort food” you’d explained and invited him into your bubble. He was as touched as he was surprised, and he shyly accepted the offer.
He didn’t know that first Saturday camped out on the couch with a variety of snacks, takeout, and ice cream watching New Girl would lead to one of his most treasured traditions. Your playful commentary became as much of a soothing balm for him as the lighthearted comedies were. And that night Bob nodded off right there on the couch, your presence a natural melatonin when even the supplement itself hadn’t given him a full night’s rest in months. In fact, nothing had relaxed him enough to fall asleep so easily in his entire life as far as he remembered. At the time he was just startled to be awoken on the couch the next morning by your soft voice when you’d returned to have breakfast. It wasn’t something he overthought, but deep down his heart knew it was significant.
The first time you ask him to do something outside of the tower, he gets a funny feeling in his chest that he chalks up to anxiety for leaving the safe confines of their home. But he trusted you more than anyone and a trip to the bookstore seemed low stakes. Bob almost felt..excited? You’d mentioned wanting to read more, having observed his own hobby, and thought it would be a nice thing to do during long plane rides and motel stays. And when you’d heard a new bookshop was opening just blocks away from the watchtower, you’d been eager to tell him, suggesting you could have lunch at the cafe inside it and he could help you pick out some things to read, while looking for new books for himself.
Bob had to admit your eagerness for him to accompany you, as well as your genuine interest in his own interests made him feel immeasurably good. He also couldn’t stop himself from observing you. The way you smile while you sip your hot chocolate, even if it must be burning your tongue since you were too impatient to wait for it to cool. Your look of concentration as you mull over the two fantasy books you’re trying to decide between. Your kindness to the young girl that recognizes you in the checkout lane. No matter what you were doing, he couldn’t tear his eyes away.
He’s pleased when your time together doesn’t end upon returning when you mentioned wanting to read up on the roof if he wanted to join you, and of course he did.
Bob starts to feel a little more confident around you the more time you spend together. He asks one night if you’d help him cook dinner for the team, wanting to offer more around the tower instead of just cleaning up after them and providing moral support while he trained up to hopefully join them on missions one day. You were surprised by the request but were more than happy to help.
When you ask him what he wanted to make, he stutters, embarrassingly having not thought this far ahead, but he relaxes when you laugh softly and tell him you could come up with something together.
Together. His favorite way to do most things these days.
You suggest making something simple, but that still requires effort because you know the other Thunderbolts will appreciate something tasty and homemade. Bob settles on chicken parmesan and is more than willing to push the cart while you guide him around the grocery store to gather all the best ingredients.
Bob nearly begs for The Void to swallow him whole when he adds the wrong amount of seasoning while you’re cooking together in the kitchen that evening. Again, you just chuckle softly and shrug, ensuring him you can never have too much garlic.
“How do you do that?” he asks softly before he can even process what he’s saying.
“Do what?” you ask back, tasting the tomato sauce you were mixing at the stove.
“Stay so positive,” he clarifies, leaning against the counter beside you, “Not just about not ruining dinner, but…in general.”
“I don’t know. Guess I don’t see a point in dwelling on the negative.”
“Yeah, but isn’t that hard? Having been through so much - I mean we all have - so you know bad things can happen.”
“Yeah,” you nod, “Good things and bad things are going to happen no matter how I act. So, I just choose to use my energy and free time to enjoy the little things when I can.”
Bob nods, knowing your philosophy is ultimately right, but still impressed you can follow it so well. He’s once again unable to look away from you as you taste the sauce, licking your lips before you hum, pleased.
“Try this, Bob,” you murmur and before he can process it, you’re holding the wooden spoon up to his own lips and he just prays you didn’t catch him staring at yours.
After overcoming the spike of nerves, he leans in and obeys your wish. After letting the flavors sink in, his eyebrows raise. “That’s really good. So I didn’t totally screw it up.”
“Nope, told you,” you smile to yourself, returning the spoon to the pot before facing him again, and leaning closer.
Bob’s eyes widened again, flinching slightly, “What are you doing?”
“You have sauce on your lip,” you chuckle, stepping closer again and slowly raising your hand, “May I?”
He relaxes and nods, unable to form words at the current moment with you this close. He holds his breath in anticipation as your thumb gingerly swipes the drop of sauce above his lip before you lick it off your finger and return to the pot.
That funny feeling returns to his body, and yeah, it definitely wasn’t just anxiety.
Bob’s a lot more aware of the way you affect him after that day, but he still doesn’t have words for it.
No, not until he sees you adorned in a satin gown for a gala Valentina had roped the team into. His mouth ran dry, seeing your hair styled and gold jewelry resting delicately against your skin. You’d completely taken his breath away, he’d had to get out of the crowded ballroom before he passed out.
That’s how he ends up hiding out on a secluded balcony, lit just by the glow of the moon. He’s not sure how long he’s out there when you eventually find him.
“Hey, what are you doing out here alone?” you question but there’s no heat in your gaze, just a curious smile.
Bob shrugs, pacing near the balcony wall, his hands shoved in his pockets. “It’s quieter up here.”
You nod, observing the space as you join him against the railing, taking in the views of the city before looking up at him again. “You promised me a dance, though.”
Bob’s brows shoot up and he feels his breathing shallow again, “I, uh…”
“We don’t have to go back inside for that,” you add softly.
Bob’s heart pounds, “There’s no music.”
“Don’t need music, just need a partner,” you say simply before holding out your hand, “So, will you dance with me, Bob?”
Half of him is screaming to run, that if he even touches you he’s going to screw it up. But for once the other half wins, and he gently takes your hand and follows you to the center of the balcony. You guide his hands to rest on your hips, and he lets out a deep breath when you rest yours on his shoulder, rubbing them soothingly.
“It's okay, it's just me,” you whisper as you start to sway.
“I know, that's what makes me nervous,” he breathes out with a nervous laugh.
Bob almost freezes as he processes his own admission, but your soft smile takes him by surprise.
“I make you nervous?”
Bob nods sheepishly, “Oh, yeah.”
“That’s okay. You make me nervous, too.”
He looks at you incredulously. “I make you nervous?”
“Yeah,” you nod, laughing softly at his reaction, “All the time.”
“How is that possible?”
“Well, for one, you are overwhelmingly attractive,” you state, instantly drawing a blush to his cheeks. “And sometimes I worry you may not like me as much as I like you.”
Bob laughs breathily in disbelief, “I’m not sure which one of those things sounded crazier.” You chuckle yourself as Bob continues, “I like you so much it scares me.”
You slide your hands further up his shoulders to intertwine them at the base of his neck, “Would it scare you if I said I wanted to kiss you right now?”
“Yes,” he answers automatically, “But I think I’ll survive.”
Neither of you can fight the grins as you slowly lean up to finally press your lips to his. And as his hands slide around your waist and tug you closer, while your hands weave into his hair, he feels himself relax and sink completely into the kiss. Any weight on his chest disappears and those fuzzy feelings take over. And for the first time he knows it's not only his deep and strong feelings for you, it's complete and utter happiness.
Bob doesn’t leave your side the rest of the night, and when you discreetly suggest he follow you to your bedroom upon returning to the tower, he doesn’t hesitate to accept. And while you both agree to take things slow, he’s still more than content just lying in your arms and after that it is rare to spend a night not tangled up with you to some degree.
One night, a month into being with you officially, Bob is lying beside you in his own bed as a thunderstorm roars quietly in the background. You’d learned very quickly living with Bob he wasn’t particularly a fan of storms, and often used it as a reason for impromptu movie nights with your favorite person to keep him distracted. But tonight, he doesn’t seem as bothered, on the pillow next to you, smiling slightly as your fingers comb through his curls.
“I don’t think I’ve ever really been happy,” he admits quietly in the darkness, “Not until you.”
Your hand pauses its ministrations as you take in his words. In the silence, he continues.
“I mean just being with you makes me incredibly happy. But even in moments when I’m not…I feel like I enjoy things more. I feel content. Not like another shoe is about to drop. And that’s still because of you. So thank you…for showing me there’s more to life than the next bad thing.”
You inhale deeply, moving your hand again to gently caress his jaw, your thumb brushing across his lips. “Bob, it makes me so happy that you feel that way. But you deserve some credit, too.”
“Maybe,” he murmurs, “But you make it feel easier.”
A smile grows slowly across your face, “Well, you should know you make me happier than ever, too.”
Bob’s grin rivals yours as he closes the small gap between the two of you, taking you into his arms and promising himself he’d never let go of this feeling. You’d shown him happiness was possible, despite all he’s experienced in his life proving otherwise. And no matter what came of this, he had hope he’d always find it in some shape or form. He just hoped more than anything it was always shaped like you.
please like, reblog, and/or comment if you enjoyed!
isaac lahey absolute character of all time. after school job as a gravedigger. not very good at writing. problem solving skills include violence and bisexuality. gets stabbed twenty times and immediately falls in love with the girl who stabbed him. wears scarves and cardigans in warm weather. arrested for his father's murder that he didn't actually commit but totally should have. invests in a leather jacket and pretends to be evil for a while. definitely in love with his boy best friend but he has a job so he can't worry about that right now. six foot two but slouches so aforementioned boy best friend doesn't feel short. moves to paris with his dead girlfriend's father after watching said girlfriend confess her love to another guy while she dies. what's not to love.
Knowing how Hades is in the show now it’ll be really funny to see him and Nico interact bc Nico will be all Dark and Depressed in the underworld and Hades will just be like “son… please… you’re killing the vibe”
titsay
yousharknotpass
stormborns
pixelskylines
areudirty
gummygunk
