Welcome to Mutt's Fish & Chips!

(look outside rp/ask blog for mutt)

[mutts-fishnchips]

"Eh? Questions? For me?

Well, ehhehe, I suppose I'm not too busy for my paying customers..."

((hello! i am pearl. this is my mutt rp/ask account, because i really like it for reasons unknown. and this seemed like fun.

((run by @steambugs

((heres the important things to know:

((i am forgetful and have low motivation sometimes, sorry if i dont reply to things!

((ooc posts will be denoted by the double brackets

((i headcanon mutt as using it/its!

((i am romantically repulsed; asks about shipping or otherwise with a flirty tone will probably get deleted.

((i dunno. dont be weird.

[SPECIAL INVENTORY]

#🐛 = ic posts

#🐠 = ooc posts

[mutts-fishnchips]

i think it means you have to like. get more queer. transition or something

[mutts-fishnchips]

its pride month, you knoww what that means

"Huh? What? Do you want me to like... Sell gay wares? Ehhheheheh... What?"

"... What is that?"

[mutts-fishnchips]

mutt mutt mutt mutt it's okay we love your weird bulgy-eyed mouthless face i swear <333333333

The guarded look in its eyes doesn't quite fade as it watches you warily. "Friend, you don't have to defend me, ehheheheh... Weird comments are part of the job."

"But, er..."

it turns suddenly, instead turning its attention to the nearest object instead of you.

"... Thanks."

[mutts-fishnchips]

Why do you look like that. I don't mean the longness or anything like that just like. Your face. Did it look like that before too or...?

Mutt stares at you as you ask, going eeriely still as an uncomfortable silence follows.

Mutt is almost always moving, various hands tapping or adjusting or reorganising something, so for it all to just stop feels... wrong.

And then it surges back into life and barks a laugh in response. But despite how often you hear it laugh, this is the first time its sounded inauthentic.

It doesn't quite meet your gaze as it returns its attention to you. "Wow, you're a bold one, friend! Thats quite the personal question, dont you think?"

"No offense taken, though. People tell me I don't have much tact myself, ehheh..."

"I've never been too sure myself, given i dont remember awful much before I got like... well, this. But I've had the odd person recogize me, ehheheh... So I suppose there must be some resemblance!"

It smiles at you... but the look in its eyes is guarded and tense.

[mutts-fishnchips]

Hey, I'd like to order some... uuhhhhhhhhhhhh... fish with the side of... mhhhmmmmm... I don't know maybe chips

"Ohhh, ha-ha, laugh it up." It doesn't exactly roll its eyes at you, but its stare is a little judgemental.

"I don't think I need to tell you, but it's practically my motto by now, ehheheheh..."

"No fish, no chips, and no refunds!"

[mutts-fishnchips]

bro's shop was closed (ik you wont answer ths soon but could NOT resist!!!)

"Ehhhh... you must have been seeing things, we've never closed! Have you looked outside lately? Or perhaps you mistook another fish and chips for mine? Ehheheh..."

[mutts-fishnchips]

((briefly opening tumblr and found a couple asks here... im currently overseas and not using tumblr to save on data. will be answering asks when i have wifi on the 31st before i fly home. ok, bye again!

[mutts-fishnchips]

holding hands with people is gay and since you have so many hands that means youre extremely gay since you have so many opportunities for hand holding. especially with other men

Mutt stares at you, baffled, for a soid minute after you say that to it. It squints at you and begins fidgeting, seemingly struggling to think of anything to say in response.

"Well. Ehheh. An interesting theory. For sure…"

Congratulations, you've successfully thrown Mutt for a loop.

"... A tragedy I'm not on the market, then! Hand-holders must be devastated worldwide. Ehheheheheh."

[mutts-fishnchips]

Is mutt your real name or is it because you look like a mix of different things

"Ah, er... It is my real name, although I suppose you do have a point with that second thing. I don't exactly have my birth certificate on me to prove it..."

"Another happy coincidence, perhaps? Ehheheheh."

[mutts-fishnchips]

grabs yo foot

"... Er."

Mutt... Does not have any feet, anymore. You're gripping onto a severed foot.

"Ehheh. Heh." It stares at you, fidgeting for a moment, clearly uncertain of what to say next.

"Do... You need anything, or...?"

[mutts-fishnchips]

why long? gay perhaps?

"Eh?"

"Is this like... A new stereotype? Have we already ended up with gay stereotypes... For witnesses?"

"... It wouldn't surprise me, actually. Ehheheheheh..."

[mutts-fishnchips]

Hi buck bingo

((buck ruffler the duck shuffler?

[mutts-fishnchips]

What if it was named "Mutt's abdhgkkkabfhfhzglhj"

"Poor thing looked outside before they could finish their sentence, ehheheheh..."

[unan-zin]

i dont like the concept of a fish and chips shop.

[mrevilvillanplotman-official]

hey @mutts-fishnchips what do you think about this

[mutts-fishnchips]

"I mean... We don't exactly sell fish and chips anymore, ehheheheh..."

"... I actually don't know if this place ever sold fish and chips. I've heard this place was just a cafe with a funny name before this."

"Maybe the previous owner switched tactics 'cause of McDonalds, or somethin'. Ehheheheh."

[brennapepper]

“I … don't know if this place ever sold fish and chips„

“Maybe the previous owner …„

Did you ever even work here??

Is your name even Mutt???

[mutts-fishnchips]

"I... Eh..."

Mutt averts eye contact, looking mighty uncomfortable.

"My name is Mutt, Know that much. People found stuff I wrote before all this went down. That's just a happy coincidence, ehheh... heh."

"If I ever worked here... No idea!" It smiles, like its trying to make a joke. "Certainly wasn't my job before the world ended by what I can tell."

"Hard to say, though, when you barely remember what it was like havin' legs, nevermind anything else. Ehheheheheh..."

[unan-zin]

i dont like the concept of a fish and chips shop.

[mrevilvillanplotman-official]

hey @mutts-fishnchips what do you think about this

[mutts-fishnchips]

"I mean... We don't exactly sell fish and chips anymore, ehheheheh..."

"... I actually don't know if this place ever sold fish and chips. I've heard this place was just a cafe with a funny name before this."

"Maybe the previous owner switched tactics 'cause of McDonalds, or somethin'. Ehheheheh."

[astronomerberyl]

Kingpin. I can't believe I have to say this again.

Olive did nothing wrong. Stop spamming my damn inbox, and OTHER people's inboxes.

No, she's not a pedophille- what the hell? Where did that come from? No, she's not a zoophille. She did nothing wrong. I'm genuinely so sick of this. You're not helping anyone. You're being a danger. Yes, you tried doxxing her. Sleuthing to find the location on someone's banner is an attempt to doxx.

God, I'm so glad you can block from anon asks. Pretty sure it only blocks them from sending asks though? So. Kingpin. You'll probably see this. Really, YOU'RE the one that needs to get called the amount of curses you call Olive in each of your asks.

I'll be so deadass I think they sent an ask to every askblog of mine they knew about. Like. Jesus christ, man. They're just making up shit about her. "if you didn't want people shipping their ocs maybe don't rp at all and just go rot!!" What the hell kind of logic is that? Again, you're trying to stop people from HAVING FUN. I really just skimmed your asks, I don't want to read 9 asks that are just full of the words "fuck" and "fucking". But I know you're just getting worse, Kingpin. Get. Help.