Midnight

welcome to a stranger's safe space

[mydnightposts]

I dont wanna meet you so late when im already broken bruised and bitter.

I dont wanna burden you with stories and tears about why i am like this.

Find me now when im still happy

Please for the love of God,

Save me.

[mydnightposts]

Im so done.

[mydnightposts]

And I prayed to

the lord

Last night.

I said, I still

Stand by with

What I said when

I was 12.

But please, I begged,

Dont let the pain be

That bad.

If anything,

Be gentle with

This beating heart.

I know the pain is

Inevitable but God

Make me numb.

I cant go back to being

Strong alone

Tears in the bathroom

Cries in the void.

I cant keep on

Looking at the moon

And be reminded of you

Because thoughts are evil

That when I think im

Almost at the finale

Im actually just

back in the first

Fucking level.

Im tired of overthinking

My poor mental health

Cant take this.

I know the feeling is

Exhilarating but damn at night

I cant stop crying.

This is what You

get for

Fucking falling.

[mydnightposts]

Fear and Feeling-

And what do u do with a heart that just feels.

What even is a heart if not for feeling,

Love and pain

Sadness and joy.

What do u do with a heart that just feels

Both numb and tingling.

All these emotions with no one to dump it with

Alone in the room outside it rains

Inside theres tears.

Fear, all it does is feel.

[mydnightposts]

Nobody reads it like you do.

[mydnightposts]

School’s been a roller coaster for me.

[mydnightposts]

Back

[mydnightposts]

And Lord if he aint for me

Dont show him in my dreams.

[mydnightposts]

And he said he aint suicidal

But is quick to jump in the pool for someone

who’s gasping,

end is nearing ,

to him desperately clinging.

he-

He

Doesnt mind if hes drowning.

[mydnightposts]

I often daydream of the time we will meet. I wonder, if youll like what you see.

Will you stare as I look at the stars? Or will you just pass by and wonder later--- i shouldve asked for her number.

Will i give it to you? Or will I think of you as a psychopath , killer, a stranger.

Will we both know that we were meant to be? Or will we both continue walking, chasing time . Act like we didnt just pass our happily ever after and in love, that would be the biggest crime.

[mydnightposts]

"She does this sometimes you know.. Run away. "

"Where did she go this time?"

"Whenever thoughts pester her brain-- I went to that place where she would always stay. She wasnt there. Went to the beach. I thought maybe she was by the ocean drowning her tears in the water. She wasnt there either."

"So she just.. left?"

"Yes. But if theres one thing about her, she will leave. But she will always leave clues."

"How do you know that?"

"How do you think I found her secret places? I intend to find her. And I will"

[boykeats]

i’ve been thinking about this maggie stiefvater tweet all day

[”To me, horror and fantasy are such wonderful siblings. They share parents: Broken Rules and Possibility. If you break the rules of the world, all kinds of things become possible, and if they are good, we call it magic, and if they’re bad, we call it horror.”]

[mydnightposts]

I had someone who only loved me for my poetry. So when I ran out of words he left me.

Had someone who loved me for I was spontaneous. When the time came and all I had was fear , he left me.

Met someone who loved me and my shadows. So when I turn the lights on , he left and cowered.

Someone told me the reason why he can't sleep. Because of a past lover who he always remember. Wrote him lullabies and from there he started to sleep.

He ued me as his therapist.

[mydnightposts]

These intrusive thoughts

[mydnightposts]

Im back lol

[mydnightposts]

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lol

[mydnightposts]

Ask mydnightposts a question

uhm hi lol