My Life As It Is Coral

This is my life in words, in all its craziness, and boringness, this is me.

[mylifeasitisme]

Barbed Wire Fence

Today I was awoken from my slumber at eight in the morning to go outside and help my dad with his latest project. Now, for all of you who don't know, I basically live on a farm. But luckily for me instead I was sent to the store to buy breakfast so that my mother could make us breakfast so I went to walmart and bought some food and when I came back I went outside to see what I could help with and not much longer after that we were summoned inside by my mother for breakfast... 

Now, after breakfast on the other hand.... We went outside and worked none stop until three o’clock, when we were yet again summoned by my mom for food, but in those couple hours between breakfast and lunch we worked on putting t posts down and measurements, making sure they lined up correctly, putting the barbed wire on them and then securing them, and also making holes and such for the wood to go in the ground. It has been a tiresome day with rain and strong, very cold, wind. I literally could not feel any of my fingers or toes, I had snot running down my face and tears down my cheeks. Not a fun time at all. 

BUT the fence looks amazing! Also when we were like an hour or so from finishing the fence a fucking tree fell down! We were so shook and we went to check and see if it took our fence down with it but luckily it didn't. It was a close one though. 

[mylifeasitisme]

Vegan Recipe of the Week

One of my goals this year was to try one new vegan recipe a week. And I, of course, chose Sunday as that day, and because today is the first Sunday of the year I could not possibly mess it up. So I stuck to my word and thus: 

Vegan Cauliflower Alfredo 

Ingredients:

1. 2 cups small cauliflower florets 

2. 2 cloves garlic 

3. 8oz whole-wheat fettuccine 

4. 1/2 cup vegetable broth 

5. 1/4 almond milk 

6. 1 tsp extra virgin olive oil

7. 1 tsp dijon mustard 

8. 1/2 tsp salt

9. 1/4 tsp ground white or black pepper 

10. 1/4 cup chopped fresh herbs, such as chives, basil, and/or parsley 

I am no chef, like at all. I never cook unless I absolutely have to, its not my favorite thing in the world to do, so of course I had some help from my lovely mother and we actually made a whole lot more than what the ingredients said just because of how it turned out, ha. Also, when my mom was checking to see if the noodles where done she grabbed one and threw it against the wall to see if it would stick??? Does anyone else do that?? She said thats how you check to see if its done, or thats what she heard anyways so she tried it lol.   

Rate: 7/10 

It was a bit bland but it was much better than what I thought it would taste like so thats always good. 

Anyways, until next Sunday! 

xoxo 

[mylifeasitisme]

Update!

Monday: leg day/booty

Tuesday: HIIT

Wednesday: arms/back

Thursday: HIIT

My goals for this week was to work out five days out of the week including Friday, but I cheated. I hadn't planned on going to school that day so I figured I’d workout sometime during the day and chill at night, maybe go out, but I went to school and didn't work out. And I thought, Sunday is the perfect cheat day because its the last day of the week, thus five workouts a week, but also the beginning of a new week, so I’m killing two birds with one stone. And thats what I did. I came home after work today, got ready and headed to the gym for another leg/booty day. And as for my water intake, I succeeded! Exxcept for Saturday, I didn't drink a full bottle, but every other day of the week I did. So maybe not a complete success but I did try, and its the thought that counts, eh ;) 

But anyways for this week, Jan 8 - Jan 14, now that school has officially begun my goals for this week is to be in bed by 11pm every night, up by at least 6:30AM for breakfast, read a chapter a day, AND keep up with my school work, no more procrastination!!! 

[mylifeasitisme]

New Years Resolutions

This past week has been one of realizations.

With new years being literally right around the corner and all I have made many realizations about myself and things that I need to change, hence the name of this blog post.

This week I have realized how much I’ve slacked on life and responsibilities and how I’ve become very lazy at home. And how much I have slacked on myself and my well being, so I’ve come up with a list.. A quite long list in all truthfulness, of things that need to change.

For starters I need get my priorities straight, I have a lot of things that I need to pay off and not enough money, but not only that I forget to pay or I think I paid when in all reality I haven’t. So I have to make notes to self. I also need to pick up more shifts at my job no matter how much I hate it to pay off for the things that I owe and I need to start putting more money in my savings as well. So, resolution number one.

1. Money mindful.

Another thing that I am going to start doing is posting on my blog once a week starting today, New Years Eve. I will post every Sunday after work whether it be life updates, short stories, tips on what ever, a review on a book I read, something new I tried, or my whole week summarized into one post. So,

2. Write more.

This year I WILL BE BETTER!! I am going to flip my world upside down for the better. I am going to find motivation on living a healthy life style, I am going to work out at least three times a week, I am going to eat healthier! And one thing that I have decided to do to help me get towards that goal is to try a new VEGAN recipe every Sunday night… Except for tonight of course, because, New Years, duh.. I will be making small changes to my diet as I go throughout the year and my goal is to be thinner by Spring break in April and for me this is very achievable if I stick to the plan. And this my friend, is my third resolution!

3. Healthy lifestyle.

I have many more goals for myself this year, but too many to fit into this blog post and talk about so I am keeping it short and will update every Sunday night as I go on as to which goal I am working on for that week and the changes in my life and I will be as truthful as possible. So, to start this trend off, this week (Jan 1 - Jan 5) I will be working out every single day AND drinking at least one water bottle a day. I know that seems like nothing, but if you know me, I only drink water once a month, so for me this is huge.

Anyhow, tell me about your New Years resolutions, I would love to know what you want to change this year.

And to end this blog post I wish everyone a Happy New Year filled with nothing but blessings and love!

xoxo

[booksqouted]

Some people, weak people, fear solitude. What they fail to understand is that you don’t need anyone, you can take care of yourself.

Gail Honeyman, Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine (via booksqouted)

[books-n-quotes]

I am slowly learning that some people are not good for me, no matter how much I love them. I deserve someone who is gentle and kind, because my soul is getting tired. Realizing that I deserve something good is one of the first steps.

Michelle K., Why I Need to Say Goodbye to You (via books-n-quotes)

[mylifeasitisme]

all i want for christmas is to feel again.

[wnq-quotes]

Do not protect my feelings if I ask your opinion: I’m asking because I’m unsure; I’m asking because I know something’s wrong. Tell me the truth. Be brutal. Help me.

Tennessee Williams, Follies of God: Tennessee Williams and the Women of the Fog

Read more on wordsnquotes

(via wnq-quotes)

please. help me.

[mylifeasitisme]

I just want to feel again. Is that too much to ask for?

[mylifeasitisme]

Still As Hopeless As Ever

Turns out this guy I told y'all about that I had a thing for is actually my best friends cousin and thats why she would get so heated when our other friend led him on and when she was about to start doing the same thing again last year... Ok well, umm.... This boy is nothing like I thought. And I don't mean that in a good way. 

He has way too much baggage. He just got out of a two year relationship with this girl and the other night when we were on the phone he told me he still loves his ex, which is understandable because that was two years of his life, but you don't tell the new girl you’re talking to that. And I wanted to give him some lee way, but I don't think I can. Nor do I want to... And just the way this boy talks... Or more like what comes out of his mouth... Sometimes I wonder if he's stupid or being funny. Like I just wish y'all could hear him and tell me all the answers!!! 

Also, today one of my besties got a picture of me and captioned it “y'all hit my girl up if you loyal and single” with my snapchat name and over TWENTY guys added me! Like woah.. But I don't think anything is gonna come of them to be honest. I mean, at least I know they find me attractive. 

God my love life is still as hopeless as ever.. 

Am I too high maintenance? 

[mylifeasitisme]

Crushes and ‘Things’

Ok,so heres the thing about crushes. 

They fucking suck.

 Thats why I don't get crushes. I get ‘things’ and by things I mean like I’m interested, but I’m not 100% obsessing over you and wishing you had a crush on me too, because I’ve had one of those, and oh was it bad. 

So when I tell my friends I have a crush on someone they groan because they KNOW how I get but if I say I have a “little thangy thang thang for somebody” they go, “aww who is it?!” Another thing.. I haven't had a crush on anyone since freshman year.. I am now a junior. My crush freshman year was awful, and to this day I still think about it because God that boy was just OOH! 

Yeah, my crushes last for ever, thats why I stay away from those. 

Ok, well last year I had this little thing for a boy from our rivaling school. He had moved back to my school and he knew two of my best friends from years back so they talked about him a lot because he used to be in love with one of them and she strung him along and made him think he had a chance, and she was going to start doing the same thing and my other friend got pissed as hell at her for it so he was the main topic in our lunch room conversations for a while. 

Anyways, since he played football he became friends with my cousin, and he used to hang around him a lot, but I didn't know who he was at the time and developed a ‘thing’ for him, up until I realized he was the same guy from the same heated conversations during lunch hour. 

I let that go real quick because I didn't want anyone who used to want my friend. 

But my sixth sense was tingling with this one. And if you don't know what a sixth sense is its probably because you're a boy.. My mother told me about the sixth sense when I was a freshman and I’ve fed it and nourished it to the point where I can now tell when someone has a ‘thing’ for me and this boy definitely did. I could tell, my sixth sense could tell, and that didn't help my ‘thing’ for him... But eventually I did forget about him..... Until last night when he just waltzed his fine self into my job.  I kept doing my own thing and ignored it, but every time I looked up he was already looking, and then my time to get off came and I got on the phone with my mom, giving him no chance to talk to me, but boy did he slide into those dm’s that same night. And now I have no fucking clue what to do with this ‘thing’!!! 

[mylifeasitisme]

Trouble In... Paradise?

I have gone through three guys this month, and I know how that sounds, trust me. But thats not what I mean. 

I am finally trying to put myself back out there, you know, the dating world and I have given many guys that I would usually never give chances to a chance. Because you know how they say, “its the person you least expect.” Ok well don't listen to them because THEY’RE WRONG!!!! 

The first guy I went on a date with was my teachers twenty year old son, I am seventeen, and he was super nice on the date and respectful. He respected my space and there was no funny business, but boy he wasn't like that over snapchat, and he started getting a little to comfortable and tried touching on my leg the second time we hung out so you already know I had to cut that mofo off. 

The second guy I went on a date with is a coworker. I know, that was my first mistake.. I used to have a little crush on this guy or what ever so when he slid into my dm’s I was like “oooh baby!” But the first time we hung out was awful. All his friends were there and they were weird as fuck and he barely talked to me, the second time he took me to his house and tried to kiss up on me and I wouldn't let him which he respected and I liked that so there was a third date. And that one was better... Until he got us told off by an employee at books a million... He wasn't bad but his hygiene was!

NOW, you know how they say “third times the charm.” ? THEIR ALL LIES!!!!!! DON’T BELIEVE A WORD THEY TELL YOU, ITS BULLSHIT. 

Man I love me some mf dark chocolate, its my weakness, so when a fine ass dark chocolate boy slid into my dm’s I was like, “he gotta be the one!” WRONG!!! YOUR INSTINCTS ARE WRONG CORAL!! WRONG!! All this mother fucker wants to do is fuck and he says its not but the way he talks to me proves other wise and we just started texting like two days ago and he's already calling me BABE?!?! I have a date with this boy on Friday, but guess who aint going.. ME! 

Anyways, dis just a short rant about my hopeless love life :) 

[mylifeasitisme]

Football Cutie

Today me and a bunch of my friends left school to go to Huntsville for the volleyball games, but we only bought the ticket so that we wouldn't get counted as absent for today and then ditched. We went to Mcdonalds and then my mom called me and told me to get my ass back home which is an hour drive so we all bolted back to our home town, which I don't even know why because I didn't even come home until way later. But anyways, thats not the point. On our way back home I was feeling very energetic and happy and there was a bus full of football players so I told my friend I was going to pick a song and sing to them. I picked Baby by Justin Bieber and she pulled up into the lane next to them, I role down my window and starting singing my heart out to them getting lit and they look at me like what the heck? But some of them were laughing and then this fine ass black dude starting jaming out with me and singing along AND OMG IT WAS GREAT!! We exchanged phone numbers and have been texting since earlier and I might see him tonight after the football game ;) 

[poetic-beats]

Binge, starve, repeat. Disgusting fat pig, Disgusting big enormous mess. I am worth- less. I ate too much today, I binged all day now I must diet and starve to feel nothing any more. What is this all for? Told I’m not skinny enough to get help, so I will show you, I will be 100lbs before the year is out. Make me skinny please with tears in my eyes I cry make me skinny god, please.

Erin, make me skinny please.

(via

poetic-beats

)

[wnq-writers]

I quit drinking, but I never got sober. I had not realized I was so drunk on you.

James Harrison Lewis (via wnq-writers)

[mylifeasitisme]

Social Anxiety

As a child I was very timid and liked to keep to myself. Other kids scared me. Parties scared me. New people scared me. New and unfamiliar things scared me. Anything that had to do with people and trying new things had me shaking. I somehow became comfortable after years of living in the same small town, with the same small town people. I was more outgoing and had many more friends. Everyone knew me, and I knew everyone. I was done with my social anxiety, I was finally comfortable.... But then I had to start a new life in another small town, with new people. Surprisingly, my first day I wasn't nervous at all, just timid. I was fascinated with everyone at this new school, new town. Granted it wasn't that far from my old town, but it was different in so many ways... My anxiety came back.. I’m intimidated by the “cool” and “popular” kids. I get invited to parties and I want to go oh so bad, but instead I make excuses. “Oh, I’m busy tonight, sorry.” “I have to work ugh!” “My parents won't let me.” I’ve been living in this town for three years now, almost four, and I’m still terrified.. Which my anxiety doesn't stay with me all the time. Sometimes I can be super outgoing and talkative to new people and the cool kids, and other times I find myself searching for any chance to flee and go somewhere alone or with any of my four friends. Sometimes I go out of my way to not be seen, or pretend like I don't see someone I know in hopes that I won't have to engage in conversation. I get scared and no one knows that. I’m not being rude or mean, I’m scared. I want to go, oh so bad, but I’m scared. What if I don't fit in? What if I say something wrong? What if I’m not good enough? 

Today I was invited to a party. My first high school party. 

I’m a junior. 

And I’m going to this party. I’m surprisingly calm about tomorrow night, but at the same time I’m anxious. I don't know what to expect. Maybe I’m calm because one of my few close friends is going and I’m riding with him, and because its the new girl at my school hosting the party. And the person we’re hosting the party for used to be my best friend freshman year. Maybe all of this contributes to my lack of social anxiety. But I’m afraid that once I’m actually there, I won't be able to control it. But I’m going to go, and I’m going to get over this. I want to get over this now. 

[mylifeasitisme]

Fall Break

Life update!!!!

Ok so I f i n a l l y went to the gym on monday for the first time in for everrr!!! I did legs and omg am I flipping sore. Well when I came back home my dog was missing a chunk of his fucking leg! Yeah I freaked the fuck out. I wanted to take him to the vet but instead I called my mom and asked her what to do and she told me to call my dad. My dad asked for pictures and videos, and instead of sending me to the vet he told me what to do, and my baby boy is doing sooo good. He’s obviously still hurt, but he can walk some, and he’s healing nicely. He’s sleeping inside on top of cardboard boxes bc the medicine I’m putting on him stains really bad. My hands are still purple from where I put it on him this morning. And my moms are still purple from Monday, when it first happened.

On Tuesday I went out with my friend for breakfast and then shopping. I had birthdays gifts to buy. So we went to the Little Kountry Kitchen down town, and then headed to Decatur and we stopped at TJ Max, BAM, Dollar Tree, The Thrift, The Mexican store, and then to get my hair cut.. Which, by the way, THEY FUCKED UP!!!

My hair already grew past my shoulders and I want it to sit on my shoulders which they did pretty good on, it’s a little bit shorter but barely any, but my problem with my hair is that fact that SOME PARTS OF MY HAIR AR LONGER THAN THE REST!!! I paid flipping $13 for a flipping trim with the white salon and the only reason i even went there is bc my mexican lady isn’t open on monday’s or tuesday’s.. I mean I’m not mad bc hair grows back, but if you’re gonna charge that much, at least do your damn job right.