My Precious Seoul @mypreciousseoul - Tumblr Blog

Posts

If there's something that I learned recently is not letting social media and the internet dictate what I truly feel or think about something. That building a strong foundation of where my heart and mind is at about something is very important.

The world is so messed up nowadays that hearing an opposing view about something could cause people a lot and I am so against it.

#truth #reality #innerstrength #think critically

You're my Constant.

When I met you, I never thought you'd have this kind of impact on me. You helped me become a better person each day. I'm amazed by you each day and believe in you no matter what you put your mind to. You taught me how to become disciplined with my mind, heart, and soul.

You're the best gift the universe and God gave me. Thank you for being you.

#love #relationship #right person

I had so many things to share as I got older. 24 year old me might not have known this yet. The concept of loving myself now is being real to myself. Tough love taught me to straighten up and reject the crying and start working. If I can't do it, don't lie to yourself and face it that you can't. Be real to yourself and start evaluating your thought process and mind condition. Discipline is still the key

Life update. Thank you self, for allowing yourself to go through all those things. Now, I'm slowly becoming strong-minded as years passed and guess what? That someone you're praying for helps you see the world for what it is. No more sugarcoating and codling of emotions. You are now facing reality how you should be facing it. I lover every bit of it. This is what I prayed for years! Thank you for not giving up 💜

#reality #truth #logical #practical

Kapoya na oi. Ambot oi ngano naa man ko diri na situation. Pwede ba. Kapoy na kog apas sa mga tao sa akoanv palibot. Kapoy na kaau ko! Ako nlng pirmi mali. Ako nlng pirmi tanan! Kapoy ko wa na ko nalipay.

I'm sorry my old friend, it's been a long time. I'm becoming so tired. I wish I could just disappear.

Mag bisaya na ko since wala man guro mubasa ani. Kapoy kaau ko legit. Gusto kaau nako I comfort akoang uyab run sa iyang kaagi pero labaw pud ko tabangonon. Kapoy ko oi. Work, responsibilities and finances. Labad na akoang ulo. Maka hurot ug kusog ang tanan. Lami kaau pakamatay nlng ambot oi mayawaan ko kadugayan diri tabang.

#thoughts

I'm deeply motivated. I'm struggling. Zero money on my pocket. No matter how empty my pockets are, there's this light that kept telling me to move forward and continue. I know deep inside that all these pain and struggles comes a new beginning a fresh chapter where hopes are high.

We have been burned by the same flame a couple of times and it's time to break the cycle. Universe, Angels, Lord, spirit guides. I know you're listening and I know you have our backs and we will rise from this hell. Thank you for always guiding me and my partner. I pray for clarity and success. I know you got my back Universe. I know 🤍

It's been so long since I have written here and there has been a lot going on. My life is so loud in contrary with how I used to live my life before. I was easily influenced, my mind was poisoned, my life was a mess. I quickly realized what's going on. I know I can easily absorb energies which takes me back to the point where the new people I surround myself with aren't really helping me grow but it's trying to take away what I built.

I was disappointed with myself but there's nothing I can do about it. Tried so many things to try and mend myself but it keeps crashing. I don't know what was going on until I tried to slowly break away from certain people. I knew I can still revive myself. The moment I finally had a clear view I knew it's meant to be that way. The uncomfortable energy si what pushed me to aim for a higher understanding of the world and how I train mind to this awful world.

I have to relearn everything but it was all worth it. Without darkness the light is meaningless.

2021. You know what. I didn't like what happened but I appreciated why it happened. It was an emotional rollercoaster I have to deal with. I have to be stronger than I used to be. Bullets we're aimed at me and I still survived. Words were meaningless when actions contradict. I used to be all about the lavish life but I realized how a humble life could mean more to me at this point.

I detached myself entirely to get a hold of what's real and what's not as I was being caught up in the illusion and I found myself in epiphany. There is indeed freedom in isolation. I don't blame Elsa for building a castle made of ice. Sometimes it's best to be alone and stay out of reach to remind yourself what really matters.

2021 you humbled me. When I thought I lost it, you help me find myself and to remain true to who I really am. I remembered the days when I created my new Facebook account to isolate myself it was the most fulfilling part of my life. I knew my boundaries and I knew how to stand up for myself. My intentions are pure and clear and none of other people's opinion about me matters as long as I know I'm not harming others. I am my own sanity. I am at peace with myself.

These past few years, I was in the dark. I am too caught up by the noise I was too scared, too worried, too damaged inside. I let too many people in that I start to crumble. I keep spiralling and feels like there's no way out. I feel so obligated to respond when my body says otherwise. I was just lucky enough to have a few friends, my family and a partner who's there as my escape route when I'm about to lose it.

I need to remind myself that I don't need to always fit in. I am me. I am not what people thought I should be but I am who I know I am. No one can no longer threaten my individuality and independence. I am for myself, my family and a few love ones. I don't need a big circle to keep myself sane. Few is enough to keep me company when I'm ready to face the world again. Protecting my energy is my top priority.

Thank you 2021 for being the catalyst of regaining myself. I am ready for a fresh start 2022. I am ready for unlimited possibilities! Receptive to change and growth. Here I come!

Ps. I don't talk about my feelings often but every time I hear people telling me to keep writing cause I'm helping others, I feel accomplished.

#december 2021 #welcome 2022 #for the new year

You are strong. You are amazing. You are special. You are your greatest supporter. Believe in what you can do and your capabilities as you are not weak but you are that strong and confident person who loves herself and knows her worth. 💜

God, Universe, whatever good and higher entity is listening. Make me a strong independent women who uses her head and heart effectively. I want to be wise and logical. Please don't let me break over the smallest issues. Give me the wisdom to keep my heart strong and guarded from harm 💜

I am a strong independent woman!

4years ago, I am pride myself for being my own life support. I don't need anyone to validate my existence. I love what I love and I get what I want. I never needed anyone to be my supporter cause I am my own support system. I'm proud to say I am a strong independent no boyfriend since birth girl. I am not the girl to mess with.

2016, I had a fling. It was the first time I need to be around a person almost everyday. I don't know what I'm doing but it was my first encounter of an unofficial relationship that we call today a situationship. It was nice an all until I finally open up to the person. I started trusting him and then things happened. A friend of mine called explaining to me the whole situation that happened the night I told hime to go home but still go to the party I did not approve. I found out that one of my best friend kissed my fling and that friend clearly knows what that person mean to me and that we're special to each other. I did not know exactly what to feel that time. My cousin give me the courage and validated my feelings we ended up feeling ok but we eventually fall apart. I gave him a letter of goodbyes and never spoke to him again.

2017, I had my first official work. I left the past behind and I'm still living and grinding on my own. I started my work and everything is running smoothly. I met my first boyfriend. We had a great time it was my first ever love that I did not deny and shy away from but we drift away and suddenly I felt the detachment for only 1 month I was left in the cold just for a small fight that ended badly. It was the first heartache and I instantly felt like I was not worth fighting for and I was meant to be left hanging. It was a break up full of anger.

2018, I transferred to another workplace and I found my second boyfriend. The start of the relationship feels like a fairytale. He felt like a dream come true to me. Talking under the stars, on the shore, we go home together and after we hangout everyday. One day we become official and we are inseparable. That night one chat from someone shattered me to peaces. It was his ex trying to be friends with me. I then found out that they were still messing around when we're together. I did not know what to do but I remained calm and try to ignore everything that happened until I finally let go and we no longer talk. The deception and betrayal really drowned me but it made me realize so many things I neglected and one of them is myself. I forgot my worth and forgot to love myself. For a relationship that only lasted 1 month it taught me a lot of things.

2019 was the day I met my current and long term relationship. It was not a easy journey we're still getting a hang of it but I have grown from my past relationships and heartbreaks. I made myself as clear as possible and I no longer tolerate the things that could potentially hurt me in the long run. I'm lucky and happy for my current relationship but I still pray and hope that I continue to never forget about myself and love myself. Know my worth and to be firm. I always pray for strength and courage to overcome the ups and downs of our relationship. I pray I become stronger each and everyday and be the better me.

Dear Precious,

You are a strong independent woman who pay your bills on time. You are a unique person who knows exactly where she stands and is capable with or without anyone around her. You are a survivor and you have survived so many challenges. Never let that one situation break you. People may see you fall but you're a fighter who never backs down and you keep rising up. You are that kind of woman! You are love and freedom and art. You are extraordinary 💜

Hello Me,

Thank you for holding on. Thank you for making sure you're learning and growing every time. You make mistakes. You have toxic traits but you're doing your best to be better each day. I love you me. Thank you for being so understanding. That's your strength and power. You're awesome as you are. Thank you for trying your best.

Best,

Reading my old posts makes me feel blessed despite being the anxious person that I am, I'm strong enough to surpass all those challenges with my inner demons. She's just as strong as I remembered her to be. I know I'm in a bad state of mind for now but things will be figured out eventually. I know my life is getting better.

"Make your mind stronger when your heart is weak"

My daily reminder that I need to work on handling my fragile emotions. Yes, emotions are valid but when your heart is weak, and you let your emotions lead you on, it's a disaster. You fall in to the trap of pity. When your heart is weak and fragile, you're prone to disappointment and unrealistic expectations. You let your heart lead you to pain and emotional suffering when you can let your mind rule over and just get back up and fight for yourself. Know what you want and be ready to draw the line and let people know where they stand in your life. Crossing your boundaries is not an option but a violation with consequences needed to be faced. It took me so much emotional rollercoaster to finally speak up and know what I really want. It's not easy but liberating. Have strength let people know that enough is enough. Your voice matters.

It's time to be more secured within

Story time

I remember vividly the year of 2017-2018 those years marked my epiphany. Those years were hurtful and was too much to handle for someone like me. First I was falling deeply and I thought it was love and that connection would last forever but that was never the case it was just the beginning of an end. Second I felt like I was being taken for granted and I was so naive to assume it was real love but that was just infatuation. Third it felt so real and the connection was so strong I thought I finally found love but it was lust. Those experiences took a toll out of me I was at the point where I realized "maybe I was not meant to be in a long term relationship" I was meant to fail and start again I was meant for mediocre feelings. I thought I would never have that in my whole life and I'm just meant to be alone and just accept the fact that I'm not gonna be accepted and understood.

Fast forward I broke my heart again for someone gay. He was a dear friend of mine and I never thought those days would be gone forever until I found my companion I consider him my bestfriend. He's someone I can really count on to when I have literally no one but the asshole that I take him for granted and rejected him twice and we lost contact. I'm not sure I already healed when we met so I just forgot about him. I'm afraid I would hurt him if I try too hard to stay yet my past hurts still hunt me. I just go about by day my the waves are calmer and he's still there to be my friend. We spent so many days and hours together and we felt so connected until we decided to give it a try and talked under the stars until dawn. It felt different from what I was used to. It's the first time I don't feel the fuzzy feeling but the security. The first time I was not so superficial with my idea of love.

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

My Precious Seoul