what is this

23 - Biromatic - Demisexual -Artist - Cosplayer - Vulture ~Death Witch~

[teathattast]

[sandmandaddy69]

[previoustags]

This is honest to god the funniest thing I have ever seen in my entire life

[karma-crystal]

This 1️⃣ goes out to all the horny 💏 couples out there who are thinking 🤔 of getting rowdy 🔞 this 💌Valentines💮 day evening: 👍 👎DO ❌️ NOT👍 👎 If you do your child 🧒 will be born 👏 a ♏SCORPIO♏ Now, why ❓️ don’t ❌️ we like Scorpio's♏? For starters, “Scorpio” has 7️⃣ letters 🔠. 7️⃣ letters 🔠: 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins ✝️ 🙅‍♀ Now, what are the 7️⃣ deadly ☠️ sins? Wrath, Sloth, Gluttony, Envy 👏👏 Envy is associated with the color GREEN 💚 What else is green 💚? Marijuana. Just 1️⃣ more pothead in the world 🗺️. LAME. Now where is pot 🍲 legal? Canada 🇨🇦, Washington, Colorado, Oregon, Alaska, airplane ✈️ bathrooms if the pilot’s 👨‍✈️ chill. And where can 🥫 planes ✈️ take you? California 🕶. And what’s on California’s state flag 🚩? A BEAR 🐻. Your child 🧒. Is gay 👨‍❤️‍👨.

[quietdoppelganger]

The execution is like slam poetry but the content is clearly a shitpost and that’s def the most powerful combination I’ve encountered in a while

[itsqueenshroom]

my bf and I have the same fucking brain

Quiplash is the greatest game ever made because it allows for things like this and you can’t change my mind.

[wooferdill]

[raideo]

[starshinebeaches]

[natsumischwartz]

[nylarac]

[ragsy]

[glowstickhaloboy]

question was how to get kicked out of hogwarts

[shadywinters]

Top tier answers here

[sabertoothwalrus]

I’m not going to explain myself

[birdwarde]

Winters Bounty

[aomine-dajki]

[hellsite-yano]

I think more creators should openly tell their fans to fuck off and stop being weird

[creepish]

a cat is just a little dude that you can hang out with

[thesylverlining]

Walk in on parents having a heated debate.

Am worried for a bit. Are they fighting?

Realize parents are having a heated debate on whether or not goats can climb trees.

Immediately side with mom, because I know goats can fuckin climb fucking ANYTHING because I remember the “crave that mineral” meme with the goat on the vertical cliff face apparently levitating to achieve the mineral it craves.

who fuckin says the internet never taught me anything

Dad has to leave to go back to work. Leaves convinced that no, goats can’t climb trees, they’re goats, they stay on the ground.

Once he’s gone, youtube search “Moroccan Tree Goats.” Find self-explanatory video of several goat up in a fuckin tree like some Dr. Seuss shit.

Mom looks at me like it’s the proudest she’s ever been of me in her life, including my university graduation

She emails it to him. At work. My dad will get a video of Moroccan goats screaming in a tree at his place of business, with the subject line “I TOLD YOU SO.”

Mom triumphantly yells to the empty house, “THIS IS WHY PEOPLE IN THE BIBLE THOUGHT GOATS WERE THE DEVIL.”

Another ordinary day in my house.

[celticorca]

@naughtypiggy @petermorwood

[petermorwood]

Here are those mineral-craving goats, and here is me explaining a rural sport of dubious veracity…

[ryngtail]

im pretty sure i met an irl disney villain at my job a few weeks ago.

[airbenderedacted]

[omghotmemes]

Every night there’s something going on

[elisha-chyan]

[nicolas-gaillardgroleas]

[autumn-spirit]

People: Aren’t you going a bit overboard?

Me: *surrounded by pumpkins and candles and sweaters* Idk what you mean?

[thepotatinator]

[sosuperawesome]

The Witch’s Cat Pins

Aurigae Art on Etsy