Soph @mysassysophzblog - Tumblr Blog

I do not know what I want to do for a job

Interesting read off IdeaPod: https://ideapod.com/i-have-no-career-ambition/

Nothing shouting spiritual from the writing yet even a careful reflection would reveal that one cannot be defined by their career, despite the temptation.

Is it a red flag if this is the quote that stood out to me:

By stopping to take a deep breath, your heart rate slows and more oxygen enters your bloodstream. This communicates to your brain to relax.

21st speech 09/08/2020

Here I rendered is a speech draft worth remembering. 21st was always a special age, as portrayed by media and society - to which it is, for physiologically and legally, that was when I became of age, and started really "growing up". Because of COVID, I did not get to celebrate my 21st the way I wished, but that too was part of growing up. So below was untidied thoughts of a 20-year-old self, yet raw and genuine - this girl was onto something!

thank you to each and everyone there who made an impact in my life - big or small

whether it's laughing at my jokes even when it's not funny, speaking truth, reality and wisdom into my life, teaching me piano skills, multiple rides and great convo

thank God

thank Lynny and sis for organising - funny anecdote - shoutout to Kel - sharing life tgt

eye contact

2 cor 4:16 not sure if it's too early but - Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

nah i seek to use my youth well

1 cor 10:31 sth i aspire to do - So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

still so much to learn, hope to be a blessing for you all too

My very first Congregational Prayer

Hi everyone, I’m Sophia and I have the privilege in leading us in congregational prayer. This week, we will be praying under the first ministry front, Magnification, and particularly in worshipping our God as the God of peace and the provider of true joy.Let’s bow our heads and pray to our great God, beginning with Psalm4

Our Father in Heaven,

Hallowed be your Name.

-For it carries the very essence of who you are - the true and living God: who is infinite in being and perfection, the almighty, most absolute, most loving, gracious, merciful God of peace who works all things according to the counsel of your will, for your own glory

-We take joy in the God of our salvation because that is the ultimate demonstration of your glorious name.

We pray that Your Kingdom come,

Your will be done

On earth as it is in Heaven.

-that we would not pray according to our hearts’ desires but ask according to your will and you glory.

-that by your grace we may say “not our will but yours be done”

Give us today our daily bread

-both physically and spiritually.

-because we are overwhelmed every day by the troubles of this world, when change is the only constant, when we’re frustrated by the fruitlessness of our work, and when we’re confronted by the fragility of our bodies.

-And so we echo the words of the psalmist and ask for peace.

-We ask for relief from our distress, mercy on us and strength through our weaknesses, that in peace we may dwell in safety.

-We thank you Father for the assurance of peace we have in Christ. That though there may be troubles in this world, you have overcome the world.

(Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sinned against us. )

-Father, it is astonishing when we consider how we are blessed with your presence, your providence and your protection when your righteous wrath is all that we deserve.

-So forgive us our sins today, search us and know our hearts, test us and know our anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in us, and lead us in the way everlasting.

-And with the grace and peace we have received, help us to forgive those who sinned against us.

-Help us to extend the hope we have in Christ to this chaotic world, that they too may be reconciled to you in Christ.

Lead us not into temptation

But deliver us from evil.

⁃ We thank you for personal mercies, preservation of our body and soul, sufficiency of food and clothing, delights of family, friendships, societal harmony and peace, the promise that you will never leave us or forsake us amongst many others - that through these things, we may know you, your love, peace and joy.

⁃ We ask that you would help us to stand firm in the midst of trial and tribulations, that we may tremble but not sin.

⁃ Guard us from putting our feelings above your truths, treating our feelings as our god. For our feelings do not define truth, but your Word does. So when we don’t feel you in our situation, Father, may you purify and transform our feelings so that they are in sync with your truth, that we may remember and trust in your goodness.

For the kingdom, the power, the glory are yours now and forever

Amen.

The presence of anxiety is unavoidable, but the prison of anxiety is optional.

Max Lucado, “Anxious for Nothing”

Picking up where I left off

-Feeling inspirational and reflective

It must have been years since I have clicked and clacked on these keyboards thoughts onto this forum. Perhaps it was time to recreate those sounds that utter the spaghetti in my head...

No longer the teenage girl with angst, but the growing adult learning to sort through the intricacies of life. Sometimes more hopeful than others. But hey, most of the time, it is those random strands of ideas that spark a riveting waterfall of words so here we go. Brace yourself for some wordy literal readings with no particular and intentional practicality but the very stringing of words and vomits of thoughts :)

Lord, because your grace is undeserved I should be humble; because it is costly I should be holy and loving; because it is unconditional I should be at peace

daily devotion

God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.

Hebrews 6:10

greater assurance indeed

A quiet piece of broken spirit has a heart that knows how little it deserves yet how much it has received. Knowing the first truth is to be self-loathing, to know only the second is to be self-satisfied— both kinds of hearts will be self-absorbed—yet knowing both how lost and how loved we are reminds us constantly of the costly and free grace.

Tim Keller

I Wasn’t Ready for Marriage

https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/i-wasnt-ready-for-marriage?fbclid=IwAR05hHcZxbfsUroM6d3qWtojpqLKJj8A_MssotjCFbc1oujQxwlljwjtvss

Not sure if you’re familiar with the heterogeneous feeling of both wanting to start a relationship and fearing the weightiness of that desire. This article that unanticipatedly popped up the other way got me thinking all about the issue of relationship.

Personally, I resonated with all the “wasn’t”s in the list so give it a go and see how you go!

1. I Wasn’t Ready to Be Hurt: the more you grow the love somebody, the more vulnerable to hurt one would become--but does that mean it is unworthy to love?

2. I Wasn’t Ready to Be Molded: the anecdote that the author gave about telling putting marriage into the comfortable “someday” category cannot have struck a chord in my heart in any greater way. (Beware, I am saying this again in the next section) It’s so easy for one to be gravitated towards the someday category until that “someday” becomes “today”.

3. I Wasn’t Ready to Be Loved: *breath in and out* this, I must confess, is a big one. Love always reminds me of the undeserving grace that God lavished upon us, and me in particular. Like Jasmine, it is hard “to be loved in the midst of my brokenness”--especially when I want to be loved for my togetherness, which requires humility and gratitude.

4. I Wasn’t Ready to Die: tbh, I was a bit confused about this one. But one thing I get out of it is: it does not depends on us to be perfect wife to a husband! It is always a helpful reminder to look beyond and realise that “marriage is never ultimate, it simple paints a picture of what is to come”

As a woman (or lady or potential wife!?), the fact is that we are loved by not one but two grooms--how fortunate!

Psalm 26:1-5

David, by calling out to God to be his judge, he appeals neither to his friends to defend him not to his enemies to change their minds.

Father, I confess that the opinions of others matter far more to me than does yours. I fear looking bad. Help me to remember how accepted I am in Christ—so I will have the freedom and poise necessary to live without fear. Amen

-- there’s a difference b/w accountability and one being “intoxicated” by building an image that pleases everyone

Four Tips for Your Twenties

and this is just one of them:

“At every juncture in my twenties, the preserving goodness and mercy of Jesus surrounded me. He met my fears with provision and my sin with forgiveness.

The main lesson of my twenties was that there was more grace in God than sin, immaturity, weakness, and ignorance in me. The places I leaned on him the most were the places I had nowhere else to lean, and these were the places he most showed himself faithful. My shame, regret, and anxieties were disarmed not by being a better version of myself, but by enjoying more of Christ.”

https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/he-made-me-lean-on-him?fbclid=IwAR1UZ_QmM91rADEHLKgekjeYX7rGgtYpXzGaI8jN5qadK8cMyD-0DZVbh78

Gone

31.1.2019

Hmm where should I start?

Some might read this off my feed and consider the following dramatic but allow me to elaborate cuz somehow I do feel emotional over this seemingly-trifling matter. Little did u realise how much it entails. And it’s precisely occasions like these that made me ponder what if the separation isn’t temporary, which I’m afraid, might be so unless mercy n grace are lavished upon.

Since I’ve been born, the figure has already been here. Despite hiccups here and there, with person upon person being replaced, somehow they fit the role of looking after us in their own ways—and to me, on top of that, they have been a genuine friend—or perhaps the person to talk to when everyone else is occupied with their own lives or just limited by different external factors. And each one of them somehow just presented themselves as available listeners and I’m honoured to have a chance to be theirs. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not subtly throwing shades here for people who have their responsibilities to tend to—in fact realist would suggest that it’s precisely of that and the expected returns, that I had ignorantly fallen for.

Tbh, I don’t know and I’m not sure whether that’s true. All I know is that all of them have their own stories that made them who they are today, just like all other human beings on this earth. And often, you are almost defeated by this sense of helplessness (yet again) when you know you can’t do much to change that, not changing who they are but perhaps what they’re going through. On top of that though, one thing I’m more concerned, is the fact that all these suffering (from physical pain to emotional distraught, or really just day-to-day miscellaneous issues) are afterall, temporary—but this coming wrath from the just one is eternal. I’m concerned, thereby, whether they’ll be out of the loop about all this.

You see, geographical boundaries can often easily be bypassed, especially with technology nowadays; (Obviously, there’s the sense that the interaction might no longer be the same, and it’s quite saddening to know that the reason behind is exactly what you’ve been told, for deep down, part of you is telling you that you have to have been right at some point—whoops, just got off the tangent, back to the separation) but not so much so for the eternal segregation, because of what we’ve done, fr the little evil thoughts we once had to the self-serving desires, that the just God would have to take us accountable for accordingly. And by this I mean, our judgement is either paid on the cross or in the place with gnashing of teeth and eternal fire called “hell”. I’m not trying to terrorise anyone by exaggerating things here, but instead speaking it as God has described it.

Pause, if at this point you thought God is merciless than you thought wrong. FYI, He didn’t just hang us out to dry, but rather He became flesh and “endured for us Himself His own wrath and brings us into Himself in everlasting joy”. And by doing so, both God and us are genuinely satisfied. God received the glory and we the true happiness—that came not just from being saved, but also, fr bring fellow citizens n heirs of the eternal inheritance, fr bring members of one body in Christ who function best as each plays their roles, fr sharing in a promise that bring so much hope and to have this unfathomable relationship with God, when He’s not only fearful but shepherdy and fatherly . For someone who took the blame for us and giving us all this, I call that love tbh. True love.

Now here comes the separation. You see, heaven and hell are two different places (in case you don’t know that already). And so one can end up in one place or another—unless ofc they made the decision to proclaim Jesus as Saviour (the one who saves) and Lord (sovereign over their lives), basically proclaiming Him as who He is.

How much easier is it for thoughts to just casually float in ur head and allow it to bug you form time to time, as supposed to apologising for your mumbo jumbo everytime.

I guess I could have taken an easier route to just type up a passage about how much I’m gonna miss this, then put together a para that is deceivingly filling. Tho what good would that do? For deep down one knows, it’s not a goodbye to just a person, but potentially to everything that the vacancy is entitled to—at least in this case, my life.

If you think us Christians have figured out all things, then allow me to speak as a 19-year-old, that I haven’t, and I’m guessing I won’t till the day I die. Yet what makes us different is this hope and assurance I have that everything would be fine, that perhaps happen for a reason that only my Father would know, for He knows better.

P.S. I hope this post didn’t come off self-serving tho I have a feeling it might—in that case I seem to have fallen into the societal norm of egotism. But I guess, I didn’t mean it this way and this is a part of story that I wanna share. Perhaps not to all, but a few.

P.P.S. I guess that made leaving a tad bit easier. For one thing I didn’t mention earlier, was knowing that I always have a bolthole is more than great, it’s like this satisfaction you get when you get home with someone welcoming you after a long day of work (ensuring ur best welcomed and feel loved). I reckon this all the more suggests the contentment we get from temporary things might last a lifetime but defo an eternity—except from the one that comes from Christ and Christ alone.

You take care of the depth of your ministry, and let God take care of the breadth

John Macarthur https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/john-macarthur-50-years/

Ministry is a mercy. It’s an undeserved mercy. That means I don’t deserve it. I couldn’t earn it. So why would I walk away from it if it doesn’t satisfy me? It is a mercy that I’m even in the ministry. . . .I think if you’re going to endure in the ministry, you have to understand that being called to minister God’s Word is a mercy; it’s such an incredible privilege that you need to take it for what it is and not ask for more. The Lord has probably given you all he’s gifted you to handle.

John Macarthur https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/john-macarthur-50-years/

Look, the first two or three years of your ministry, do exposition, work hard, go deep into the text, pour yourself into that, and you’ll start good habits. Those habits will take over, and it won’t depend on self-discipline in the future—it’ll just be a habit. You just do it because you do it. And once you establish those kinds of consistent habits, that will sustain you through the hard times.

John Macarthur https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/john-macarthur-50-years/

Random thought

It’s funny how the more you know God (through reading the Scriptures and revelation by the Spirit), the more you know about yourself, humankind and this world He created

e.g. The joy that welled in me when I first started and (occasionally? often?) fills me perhaps stem from my satisfied desire to get a glimpse of Christ in his fully glory,

It’s sort of like finding Waldo—you can’t find him if you don’t know what he looks like. But when you know what he looks like . . . you find Christ everywhere.

John Macarthur https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/john-macarthur-50-years/

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