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@naideno
Who knows how long anyone’s life has. And guess what, Dad’s life was short.
- mom to yiyi
When rain lets you take a break from crying to breathe
Looking up at the sky and out at LM and feeling the same water that fell into the lake fall on my head and arms, I took a breath and spent a moment with God, knowing peace is here
Everyone’s dressed kinda cool and casual and you’re in a Patagonia, cropped bootcut jeans and an ankle brace
#dallas
Will I make it to the speakeasy or will this bourbon be it? So sad
When the best 10 minutes you had was sitting in your tub on a cushion of plastic bags full of clothes
Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears us up; God is our salvation. Selah
I know everyone around me saw it for a long time but I can’t wait to say this:
God delivered me
I couldn’t see how bad it was until I got out
—
These phrases could apply to so many situations but today it is pertinent. Thank you, God for being dependable and steadfast. I didn’t know what deliverance would look like. I slept for so few hours for so many nights and my prayers felt like groans. I can’t believe and yet I finally believe it.
I am being delivered.
—
This of course definitely would apply in the grand scheme of God’s ultimate plan to redeem us for himself. The already finished but not yet, the waiting and wondering if it will actually happen before all your strength gives out, or if you will just perish.
God doesn’t want good people, he wants sinners.
Remembering that ^ when
- I doubt that God loves me
- I feel incompetent and inadequate to carry something through
When you send everyone on your team wine except for yourself because you forgot to account for tax and there’s not enough team budget T_T
Also didn’t want to spend more than the 2 hours I already spent trying to make the math work
Clarity
Understand my weakness
But also understanding and using the tools at my disposal to still do something about the situation
Confidence
Friday night
Still have to get back to I about whether to meet up again
Also need to think about what slides to put together.. for the webcast with MDP.
On Monday — need to send the invitation to him. Draft up the slides, the script, the invitation. take language from the webcast with CS in July.
Okay anyway
It was really nice to eat home cooked food tonight with bro. I like his cooking! And I balance out his seasoning with bland veggies :D.
On a Friday evening I find myself researching road conditions, weather conditions, routes, gear for all sorts of purposes. I’m very surprised by myself. I gotta go back to nyc but I feel like it’s been about 3 years since I last felt so excited about something and actually did something about it (past things were pottery and boxing).
I do need time to journal though.
Maybe I’ll take care of all the work stuff in the morning. Budget the time. Try my best and SEND IT. And then in the afternoon hit up all the parks
I know now
It’s not about Courage to go back to New York
It’s being able to prioritize myself when the city and all the I love threaten to consume me
There is no perfect love on earth, except that of and through Christ
She brought her own seating. 1978.
“Don’t cry.”
But so, sometimes, we must. It is often the only way to heal, through the river of all we have held inside.