so I'm still here! I've been having some nasty internet problems on this end but I'll be back at it as soon as I can manage.
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Love Begins

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Show & Tell
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Origami Around

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blake kathryn
hello vonnie

titsay

if i look back, i am lost
occasionally subtle
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Kiana Khansmith
DEAR READER

Kaledo Art
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@naiilbat
so I'm still here! I've been having some nasty internet problems on this end but I'll be back at it as soon as I can manage.
B99 SENTENCE MEME ➔ episodes 1x01-1x03
“This job is eating me alive.”
“I’d like to apologize for him. His parents didn’t give him enough attention.”
“His code name if Fuzzy Cuddle Bear.”
“Good news for all you murder fans!”
“You know how old people always have that gunk on them?”
“Does anyone get a little bit of a gay vibe?”
“They’re pretty much worthless but they make good coffee.”
“The only puzzle he hasn’t solved is how to grow up.”
“It’s impossible to solve things unless you’re wearing a tie.”
“I gorged myself at that funeral.”
“Speaking of murder, what are you doing here?”
“I bet on some over-the-clothes action.”
“A dude broke in, smoked weed, and bolted.”
“First of all, I think you’re overdoing it with the manscaping.”
“You’re a bad judge of character and your shirt looks like vomit.”
“I never took off the speedo. Big mistake. It is inside of me.”
“I have a degree in numerology from the internet.”
“The drugs are in a location.”
“Your entire life is garbage.”
“I want to see what happens when I taser this cantaloupe.”
“He would literally let you do anything if you gave him a hamburger.”
“I’m anxious to restore my status as a lone wolf.”
“Do you know where we keep the glitter?”
“There’s a penis on my minivan?”
“It’s better to be a criminal.”
“My name is Banana Fartman, MD.”
“Can you go be depressed over there? You’re bumming out my whole area.”
“I’m gonna pee. That’s what I’m doing tonight.”
“I’ll end up on the streets selling my body for a can of beans.”
“Has anyone ever told you that you look exactly like a statue?”
“The universe is a cruel and vexing puzzle.”
“Why are you always telling us about your disgusting body?”
“I will make better mouth.”
“No hard feelings, but I hate you. Not joking.”
“Why was your hand in your back pocket?”
“My first instinct was not to caress her butt.”
“Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to get your life back on track.”
“Are you saying that black people can’t sell drugs?”
“Why would I ever eat off his shirt?”
“Man, girls are so scary.”
“In all cases, cops are the worst.”
“The fairy princess castle has defeated me.”
“What kind of castle has wheels?”
“I think you have many hidden talents.”
“Noooo, I have no talents.”
“Constantly getting his approval is the worst.”
“Yes. I might have given you rabies. But in my defense, that’s ridiculous and I didn’t.”
@gohomecourier | m.
“That IS ridiculous.“
“It’s like you weren’t listening to me at all.” And who doesn’t want to listen to HER? “I didn’t say that I thought you gave me rabies, I said that I probably gave it to you.” Granted, this is likely untrue, as Charlie has trouble even recalling what rabies is. Something about turning animals into slobbering, angry brutes – and what use is that when most animals are ALREADY slobbering, angry brutes?
“Picked it up off of a wandering trader – no, wait! It was the trader’s brahmin, when it bit me, because I was – ” A pause, drawn out while Charlie can’t seem to decide how best she should finish this claim. Calloused digits play across her lips. A frown, once she realizes that what she’s setting herself up for isn’t nearly as glamorous as how it sounds in her head. “ – actually, it was a Deathclaw. Ten feet tal-…oh, screw it. I blew this one. One time I met a vampire, want to hear about that instead?”
“ Yeah—because that’s how SNAKES fight! Right up in your face, with FANGS and … KNIVES and stuff! ”
Independent Butch Deloria Fallout 3 / Fallout: New Vegas / Fallout 4 Single-Ship & Affiliated / 18+ NSFW Faceclaim: Zac Efron
“A kiss in exchange for every nice thing you say about me. Deal?”
@tunnclsnake | m.
"MMMMH -- "
To her credit she puts on a convincing show of disinterest. He’d NEVER let her hear the end of it if he thought she was seriously considering his offer, and by now Charlie’s too good at acting like she doesn’t listen to Butch. Chin perched delicately across her knuckles, fingers toy with the singed edge of a comic, whose underwater escapades ( what she can still decipher of them anyway ) manage to keep her attention better than he ever could.
"But why should I?”
“The whole thing sounds like you come out of it better than me, ‘cause you’re getting compliments and kisses." Her nose crinkles at the prospect. A fate surely worse than dismemberment by Wasteland monsters is the one where she has to be nice to Butch -- and probably the one where she has to be kissed by him, too.
STRANGE SENTENCE STARTERS —— for the creative writer in you. Send these in and see what your partner comes up with as a scenario!
*These are completely interchangeable, they’re just in categories to make it easier for all of y’all.
FOR AMIGOS;
“How many times are you going to do that, exactly?”
“You were right. As per usual.”
“Sometimes it’s hard to see the lines you’ve drawn until you’ve crossed them.”
“You’re surprised because you have a soft spot for hot blondes.”
“Is that – that’s a naked Scarlett Johansson on your fridge.”
“You can stay, but for no more than two nights.”
“Please don’t look in this drawer. Please.”
“I told you not to pick him up, he’s very sensitive.”
“Yes. I might have given you rabies. But in my defense, that’s ridiculous and I didn’t.”
“I’m sorry, my cell phone data coverage does not cover the bullshit zone you’re in.”
“Hey! Give me your pants. Quick, give me your pants.”
“No, I’m serious. Stop it right now or I won’t give you the last cookie.”
“You think I’m kidding. But I’ve never been more serious about anything in my entire life.”
“How much would a stripper cost and why so much?”
“I’m going to buy you a drink. Next week. On Thursday. When I get paid. Can you swing this one?”
“Hippos are hungry, hungry! And you are considerably larger than a small piece of lettuce!”
“When I was little, I used to be afraid of mummies. And now look at me. I love dead people!”
“I don’t even miss my ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, I just miss my glockenspiel.”
“It happens to everyone, you just sell your skirt for some coke.”
“Please do not pull your pants down in front of baby Jesus.”
“That’s not the phrasing you want to use.”
“Because nothing says heterosexuality like a gold sash.”
“Please don’t take it out on my boobs.”
“When it gets really windy I look like a bizarre combination of Marilyn Monroe and Cousin It.”
“We have to change our names and run away to Mexico. It’s the only way. Adios.”
“How much money do you have on you?”
“Please tell me that’s a raisin and not a tiny hamster shit you’re eating.”
“Life is a lot better when you put things on your head.”
“For someone who’s not very deep, I’m incredibly not shallow.”
FOR LOVERS;
“I need you to remind me what it feels like to love you.”
“I love you. What? No I don’t. Forget I said anything.”
“I need you to tickle my feet but like, sexually.”
“If we got married, would I have to take your last name? Or could we just make up a new one?”
“I don’t think I can do this anymore.”
“I heard you say his/her name in your sleep last night. Want to explain or should I just leave?”
“I want to spend the night with you tonight. But I also want to sleep on your side. And without you on the bed. So technically I just want your bed.”
“Please don’t be proposing to me in an empty parking lot.”
“Stop saying you’re sorry, you stupid fucking broken record. It’s done.”
“I’m not jealous, I’m curious. About the things you were doing. With him/her. Without me.”
“Your mother’s looks could kill. Actually, are you sure they haven’t before?”
“If you’re breaking up with me tonight, can I at least eat first?”
“Stop sweating. It’s not attractive during sex, and it’s not attractive now.”
“Are you – are you checking me out? In the line for the confessional?”
“We have to go. I might have told your mom I’m pregnant. I don’t know why I said that. I’m not.”
“So what you’re saying it that you’re snorting sugar to get excited for sex.”
“My dog licks better than you do.”
“But through every stupid thing you do and say – and those are a lot, by the way – I love you.”
“I don’t care if you’re growing another head. I’ll talk to both of them. I love you.”
“And I’d take fifty years of not talking to you for just a day of doing so. I promise that’s a compliment.”
“I don’t want to hide this anymore. I’m not some dirty little secret, you American Reject.”
“This is a bit too dramatic for my taste, so can we skip it and have sex instead?”
“I don’t want you to think of me as your personal sex toy.”
“Thanks and all, but that makes me feel like a low-class escort, so.”
“A kiss in exchange for every nice thing you say about me. Deal?”
“Promise me you’re not like him/her. I need to hear it from your mouth. Promise me.”
“Look, I’ve had my heart broken before. I’m not ready to let you in just yet. Anywhere.”
“Don’t leave me here. Anywhere else, okay, but not here.”
“I wish I could say that was the worst sex I ever had, but I’ve had worse.”
“I just blew you. Could you look a little happier about it?”
“I’m attracted to shiny things, so if it looks like I’m staring at your chest, it’s because I am.”
FOR TEXTERS;
[text] This is upsetting my poop.
[text] Hey, are you up? If you’re not, can you wake up? I need some help.
[text] So it involves feces and large birds.
[text] She said that to you? Why?
[text] Please come back. I miss you.
[text] What are you good for if you’re not gonna bring me ice cream?
[text] Can you ignore that last text? It wasn’t meant for you. I’m sorry.
[text] …did you just send me a nude?
[text] FUCK OFF YOU ONE-EYED WHORE.
[text] I don’t know why I said that.
[text] Leave it to you to fuck the simplest of requests up.
[text] Do we have to go to their wedding? He’s only my first cousin.
[text] How much does ‘I love you’ mean to you?
[text] I am not stalking you. But you should do something about your bathroom, it’s gross.
[text] Please. I need this so badly.
[text] I trust you completely.
[text] I’m a genius. You’re a peasant. Everything makes sense again.
[text] Hey, buddy! Got like, five hundred bucks I can borrow? Times ten.
[text] She lost it. She completely lost it. She said her uterus was attacking her bone marrow.
[text] I will not get you donuts.
[text] Please? I love you.
[text] I think I’m gonna go to sleep now, but you keep thinking that.
[text] I can’t say this out loud. They might be listening.
[text] I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t think he’d duck when the ball came at him, I’m sorry.
[text] You’re cute.
[text] I just need you to understand how important you are to me.
[text] Fuck off.
[text] Okay. Guess we’ll leave it at that then.
for reasons known only to this forsaken hellsite, when i logged into the mobile app it saw fit to autofollow a handful of people off my star wars dash. so that was something. not that i don’t adore my space buds but seriously get your shit together, tumblr.
Things change fast, but this too shall pass -- better carve it on your forehead or tattoo it on your ass. 'Cause who can tell, when the clock strikes twelve, if today’s become tomorrow or if it’s all just gone to hell.
( written by alicia. )
italic.bold. line
subsmalldouble smallbig! bigx2big x3
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