THE UNSPEAKABLE ONE

HERE I COME. YOU BETTER RUN. I AM NOW THE ONLY ONE.

[antiprotag]

HOW’S IT FEEL TO BE HOME? / YOU’VE BEEN HERE BEFORE, BUT DO YOU REMEMBER HOW TO LEAVE?

[naireach]

uh. hi.

[naireach]

✝     1p15·

                     𝙷𝙴      𝚂𝙲𝙰𝚁𝙴𝚂         𝙷𝙴𝚁  .         makes  her  angry  ,  makes  her  furious  .  he  makes  it  sound  so  easy  ,  so  full  of  dark  and  longing  and  everything  that  she  hides  .  so  easily  do  his  hands  pluck  that  thing  called  a  heart  from  her  body  ,  watch  it  bleed  softly  ,  unhuman  ,  unhappily  .  it  is  enough  to  make  her  sick  .  hands  balled  up  in  fists  ,  tremoring  with  a  tepid  kind  of  hate  as  she  walks  over  and  pulls  him  by  the  collar  .      “   what  do  you  know  ,   ”      spat  with  venom  ,  brow  furrowed  as  her  grip  gets  ever  the  more  tighter  .  tattoo  cuts  into  the  metal  of  her  hand  ,  sparks  flying  as  they  meet  for  the  first  time  .  he  says  it  so  sincerely  ,  so  pitifully  .  it  becomes  hard  to  ignore  and  she  hates  him  for  it  .  she  hates  that  he  knows  ,  that  he  can  feel  that  blood  that  burns  beneath  false  skin  .  she  can  still  hear  them  ,  still  feel  their  pale  hands  in  hers  ,  see  their  bodies  crumpled  beneath  the  rubble  .  they  tell  her  something  she  never  wants  to  hear  again  .  he’s  right  .      “   just  shut  the  hell  up  already  .   ”      she  throws  him  down  ,  that  hurt  in  her  voice  echoing  in  the  valley  they  laid  their  corpses  in  .      “   you  don’t  know  a  damn  thing  .   ”      how  her  eyes  hold  all  that  hate  ,  that  hurt  .

                    𝙷𝙴   𝙸𝚂   𝚂𝙸𝙲𝙺   ,   in  heart  ,  in  body  ,  in  mind  .  he  is  wracked  with  the  uncontrollable  and  unfathomable  aspect  of  loneliness  ,  of  grief  .  an  emptiness  which  can  only  be  filled  .  tired  ,  broken  ,  sick  ———  sick  of  this  tug  of  war  ,  this  game  of  being  the  throw  away  toy  .  they  meet  with  fury  and  utmost  sorrow  ,  a  black  hole  of  suffering  and  sharp  edges  ,  but  they  do  not  touch  .  he  is  sick  ;  sick  of  the  disconnect  when  she  slams  him  down  on  the  hard  ground  ,  when  she  stares  at  him  with  disdain  in  her  eyes  instead  of  something  more  .  something  he  knows  is  close  .  the  lack  of  it  will  drive  him  mad  .   “   all  you  do  is  push  me  away  ,   “   he  spits  ,  cursing  her  ,  and  yet  his  face  still  shows  sadness  in  his  ever  growing  rage  ,  twisting  strangely  ,  curiously  .   “   but  we’re  the  same  .   “   a  threat  against  her  soft  heart  .  a  blade  to  her  synthetic  skin  .  he  makes  his  way  to  his  feet  and  stands  pitifully  and  rigid  ,  head  held  low  and  eyes  peering  up  through  shagged  hair  .  a  sickness  ,  ravaging  through  each  and  every  molecule  of  him  ,  each  atom  and  each  cell  ———  a  heart  ,  a  body  ,  a  mind  .   “   it  doesn’t  have  to  be  like  this  anymore  .   “

[naireach]

hello.

[naireach]

i am everywhere lately. guess i should say where? as of now, i’ve got: 𝐚𝐥𝐳𝐛𝐞𝐭 (i haven’t been active on here for 5 years i’m sorry) @maniaphilous, 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐞 @idelar, 𝐬𝐞𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡 @gewahlter, and 𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐞 @consumecrow. i’m actively jumping between muses so activity changes between them all, but they’re there.

[naireach]

DARK CORE.

[naireach]

SENSES & OTHER SPECIFIC HEADCANONS.

what does your muse smell like?      dirt. incense. nothing fancy. when he’s not napping in pews, he’s walking around in the forest doing god knows what. don’t look behind you if you’re on a trail.

what do your muse’s hands feel like?      rough, sharp, wrong. underneath gloves (which he always wears and will very rarely take off) his hands are calloused, scarred, and covered in scrawl-like tattoos that mar and damage his skin. he never lets anyone see them or touch them (without good reasoning) because they’d hurt people, so. they’d be painful. like acid on your skin.

what does your muse usually eat in a day?      he..tries to eat regular food. more like a snacks and scraps kinda guy whenever he’s feeling it, but the truth is that his diet and appetite mostly consists of humans. during the day he might eat a few helping of regular, humane foods, and in the night he’s on the loose.

does your muse have a good singing voice?      no. doesn’t like to sing anyway. 

does your muse have any bad habits or nervous tics?      stares at people. really, really stares. bites at his lips until they bleed. doesn’t brush his hair. has a tendency to just start crying like a small child, as well as a tendency to go wild mad at the drop of a hat.

what does your muse usually look like/wear?      fairly well dressed. likes to wear a lot of layers to hide his imperfections, so for example: turtleneck shirts underneath cardigans, underneath heavy coats or the occasional large trench coat. always wears some dark colored gloves and long pants to accompany. shows only the skin on his face. dresses everyday like its winter, basically.

is your muse affectionate?  how much?  how so?     yes, but not in healthy ways. is more so clingy physically than he is in an emotionally affectionate way. he will say nice things about people he likes and/or loves, but prefers to be on the receiving end of pleasantries. sorta just follows you around like a puppy and leans close. is only outwardly affectionate when he wants something in return. his affectionate is almost always a projection of what he wants from you/what he thinks you are, rather than what you actually are.

what position does your muse sleep in?      fetal position. curled up tight. 

could you hear your muse in the hallway from another room?  i’d say no. doesn’t like to yell and doesn’t have a very loud voice to start with. rather quiet. if all else was silent and you were listening very, very closely, then you might hear him.

TAGGED BY:  @dacnophilous​ madam president  TAGGING: @automatizm​, @armazeilor​........everyone else has been tagged

[naireach]

                    @1p15​​  ———   shut  up  .  i know  the  story  ,  or  at  least  the lesson  .

                  “   𝚈𝙾𝚄   𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳   .   “   a  statement  ,  a  question  ,  a  plea  ,  a  threat  .  a  lone  light  in  a  sea  of  dark  .  it’s  all  he  asks  for  ,  all  he  needs  .  he’s  so  pitiful  ,  so  awfully  shameful  in  every  way  ;  a  mockery  of  a  man  and  a  mockery  of  a  self  proclaimed  god  .  a  tin  soldier  staring  down  the  barrel  .  a  fool  with  his  neck  at  the  end  of  her  blade  ,  aching  for  it  to  scratch  just  enough  ,  to  make  it  bleed  until  it  can  bleed  no  more  .  he’s  no  man  of  god  ,  no  god  of  man  ———  he’s  only  a  beast  ,  a  force  ,  a  means  to  an  end  .  a  piece  .   “   i  was  betrayed  ,  too  .   “   who  was  watching  ?  was  there  anyone  there  to  hear  ?  who  can  say  for  sure  ?  in  his  heart  of  hearts  ,  he’s  the  abandoned  child  ,  a  remnant  of  what’s  long  past  ,  thrown  out  into  the  cold  of  the  night  .  a  forgotten  son  ,  turned  against  .  all  he  can  do  is  reach  out  in  hopes  that  there  will  be  something  nearby  to  grab  ,  someone  close  by  to  hang  onto  .  something  tangible  ,  someone  precious  .   “   i  only  have  one  thing  to  do  .  it’s  all  i  have  ...  all  i’m  here  for  .   “   to  hold  someone  by  the  hands  and  lead  them  down  the  dark  road  .  to  guide  and  set  free  .  to  take  .  he  looks  through  her  ,  into  her  ,  with  eyes  that  see  only  fallacy  .   “   ———  you  know  .   “

[naireach]

tumblr said fuck formatting again, huh

[naireach]

u woulda thought this quarantine and everything would boost my rp presence but. rip

[naireach]

✝     kogokami

    𝙽𝙰𝙸𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙲𝙷                    /                   THE MAW.

       *  𝚃𝙷𝙴   𝚂𝙾𝚄𝙽𝙳   𝙾𝙵   𝙰   𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙼   𝙳𝚁𝚄𝙼.  Footsteps along the hard concrete under her feet, the jingle of her sword and the thump if it hitting her side. Eyes peering forward, hard and hungry, took notice of the stranger. Not turning to face them, stopping in her tracks, letting eyes look upon such a form. 

                 ‘     𝙰 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝙵𝙰𝙲𝙴, 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚂𝙼𝙴𝙻𝙻 𝙾𝙵 𝚆𝙰𝚁 𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙸𝙲𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄? Though no fires flame the streets, I will soon set it ablaze.     ’

                    𝙷𝙰𝙳   𝙸𝚃   𝙰𝙻𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂   𝙱𝙴𝙴𝙽   𝚂𝙾   ?   the  concept  of  war  is  far  off  .  no  ,  all  he  understands  is  what  comes  of  it  ,  the  sacrifice  of  steel  against  steel  in  a  desperate  ,  beautiful  struggle  .  perhaps  it’s  far  too  fairy tale  .  it  didn’t  matter  in  the  end  .  nothing  truly  did  .  only  what  comes  after  ,  only  what’s  left  for  him  to  sink  his  teeth  into  .  the  sweet  rot  of  an  aftermath  is  close  .  the  smell  of  fulfillment  .  the  fires  of  satisfaction  .   “  n-no  ,  i   ———   i  have  my  reasons  .  i’m  not  like  you  .   “

[naireach]

‘ i am sorry i do not have more time ’

                    “   𝚈𝙾𝚄'𝙻𝙻   𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴   𝙱𝙰𝙲𝙺   .   “   won’t  you  ?  the  sun  always  shines  in  the  early  morning  .  the  dew  sets  .  the  birds  chirp  .  there  is  a crisp  reality  that  never  fades  ,  but  he’s  trapped  in  these  harrowing  dreams  which  he  cannot  escape  ,  these  horrible  fantasies  he  cannot  run  from  .  she  is  so  soft  a  thing  .  too  soft  .  too  little  and  too  much  of  her  ,  just  enough  and  not  enough  to  fit  in  his  gaping  hands  .  the  sorrow  is  unbearable  ,  but  the  desire  beckons  .  this  deep  emotion  swells  in  his  belly  ,  curls  around  his  insides  and  wriggles  up  his  throat  .  she  will  always  remember  his  crocodile  tears  for  what  they  really  are  .  him  for  what  he  really  is  .   “   you  came  back  every  time  .  i  can  wait   ———   you  know  i  can  .   “   he  is  desperate  ,  holding  onto  each  small  beam  of  light  that  comes  his  way  .  she  wanes  and  he  weeps  ,  tears  himself  asunder  in  wait  .  she  comes  and  goes  in  agony  .  there  must  be  more  .   “   you’ll  never  leave  me  .   “

                   ✝   @renescentiae​​  :  BETWEEN  YOU  AND  THESE  BONES

[naireach]

✝     renascentiae

              “   𝙸𝚃      𝚆𝙰𝚂      𝙱𝚄𝚃      𝙰      𝙳𝚁𝙴𝙰𝙼 .   ”  The boy smells of her death.  She smiles, soft as a bell’s chime, for how funny it is to be strangled.  Her anger is short-lived.  The body had been chopped up into pieces and fed to the gardens already.  No need to revenge for every little mess.  “   Look  how  alive  I  am  ——-   look  closely ,  dear  boy.   ”  Her dainty fingers slide through his hair, not to dig into the scalp, not to cut it off.  Then, she pets him like a stupid pup.  “   Terrible  deeds  ought  to  stay  in  terrible  dreams ,  nay ?   ” 

      @naireach·

                    𝙰   𝙲𝚄𝚁𝚂𝙴   𝙾𝙵   𝚁𝙴𝚂𝙿𝙻𝙴𝙽𝙳𝙴𝙽𝚃   𝚁𝙴𝚅𝙴𝚁𝙸𝙴   .   if  only  these  dreams  were  not  so  haunting  ,  dear  heart  .  brightest  sun  in  the  sky  that  you  are  .  every  morning  he  is  awoken  ,  shaken  like  a  rag  doll  .  tossed  about  in  his  own  sorrows  and  foul  deeds  .  every  morning  she  is  awoken  ,  strung  together  neatly  ,  perfume  of  grape  leaves  fresh  as  the  dew  .  how  marvelous  .  how  terrifying  .   “   i’m  glad  .   “   her  touch  grants  him  respite  ,  and  he  leans  into  it  ,  soft  and  tender  .   “   i  wish  i  didn’t  dream  ,   “   he  says  ,  voice  weary  .   “   they’re  only  nightmares  .   “

[phantomemes]

starters  /  prompts taken from f. d. soul’s work ,  between you and these bones .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses as necessary .

‘  the problem is you keep trying to use your eyes  ’

‘  how i soften when you pull me against you  ’

‘  you are teaching me to love  ’

‘  i will pretend that i have not already heard the question in your eyes  ’

‘  you perhaps will become my swan song  ’

‘  it is a very human thing to love  ’

‘  you are my good days  ’

‘  i have been loved dearly  ’

‘  i promise you will not always be this war  ’

‘  thank god for the stubbornness of organs  ’

‘  it takes me seven days to stop being in love with you  ’

‘  there will always be another day  ’

‘  there will always be another mercy  ’

‘  perhaps i will take up dancing again  ’

‘  what a pretty little disaster you will be  ’

‘  i am terrified for you  ’

‘  i will fold inside of myself  ’

‘  today i am thankful  ’

‘  i didn’t want to sleep because i didn’t want to wake  ’

‘  come and get me  ’

‘  i tell myself i do not need you  ’

‘  i think i broke again last night  ’

‘  i’m just trying to connect with you  ’

‘  you are an ocean that will perhaps never stop crashing  ’

‘  burn the house down in search of yourself  ’

‘  don’t you dare ever stop looking  ’

‘  i struggle not to feel guilty  ’

‘  you are a wild  ,  unkempt thing  ’

‘  sometimes it is a very sad thing to be human and longing  ’

‘  find that you are made of russian nesting dolls  ’

‘  the trees are always kindest with spring comes  ’

‘  teach yourself the hymns again  ’

‘  he is every amen i have ever laid down on lips  ’

‘  this life is an altar  ’

‘  i am sorry i do not have more time  ’

‘  there is a mountain in me  ’

‘  by the morning i am a triumph  ’

‘  there are words playing hooky in the back of your throat  ’

‘  today is by far the most beautiful creature i have ever come across  ’

‘  there are many things that will fit beneath your skin  ’

‘  forgiveness does not take up much room  ’

‘  some days you will breathe and it will be enough  ’

‘  you do not have to hold it quite so tightly  ’

‘  there is a prayer in me  ,  still  ’

‘  you scare me a little  ’

‘  you can be a good thing and not a whole thing  ’

‘  there are flowers in my chest again  ’

‘  the rain comes and sounds like you  ’

‘  i cannot tell you why i still trust god  ’

‘  find peace and build a home out of it  ’

‘  there is never an end  ’

[naireach]

KNOCK KNOCK ANYONE HOME

                    nope. the shock of someone knocking on the door has killed him.

[naireach]

cucroga replied to your post “saint pattys day is comin so yknow what that means.”

it means ya boi cu is back in town ;))))))))))

i hereby cancel the holiday

[naireach]

saint pattys day is comin so yknow what that means.