gethsemane

what might be good for your heart might not be good for your head what was there at the start might not be there in the end

[ncptunian]

 ⸝⸝ no one’s gonna save me from my memories. ⸝⸝

tommy kurosawa. he/him. twenty9. street racer for the jackals. the thrillseeker.

links: intro. muse. appearance. pinterest board.

a dependent character blog for carpeomniarp  🖊 by alli.

[inthegardcn]

location: lucky coyote casino ; a night of rest

status: open, capped at 0/3.

Somewhere to her left, shots of top shelf liquor clinked in a toast to fifty years of relative peace. At the tables far to her right came the rhythmic flutter of dealers shuffling through decks of cards.

Bursts of victorious laughter and their accompanying growls of defeat cleaved through the air louder than any crack of gunfire and yet, even so thoroughly entrenched within the chaotic din of the evening, Safiye didn't need to see behind her or hear their steps to know someone was lingering.

Either they were there to slip a blade between her ribs over a rivalry she hadn't been around nearly long enough to fully comprehend yet or, more likely than not, they had eyes on the nearest seat.

Betting on the second—though she was one more call away from welcoming the first—she murmured, “Go on. It’s yours if you want it.” 

Still, her gaze didn't shift. Dark eyes remained locked on her phone, the thing face down and vibrating atop a cocktail napkin, while she held a glass of 2016 Chateau Margaux in a white knuckle grip.

It wasn't until voicemail inevitably took over ( and took the choice of accepting or declining out of her hands ) that Saf sighed. Or that she finally deigned to spare a glance. “The spot beside me, I mean.” A corner of her mouth twitched. “I waited about thirty minutes before I managed to snag mine so, if you're looking to stake a claim, this might be your only chance.”

[ncptunian]

"Well shit, I thought you meant your phone." Tommy shrugged his shoulders, slipping into the seat offered. "I mean my screen's busted, so I'd take it." His eyes narrowed, realizing take could translate to him grabbing it off the table and running like some low-level bandit. "Not like steal it, take it—you know what I mean." He was unusually on edge tonight, what with the unusual cast of characters occupying the casino. He shouldn't be surprised that he'd began the night announcing himself as a phone thief in this high concentration of very dangerous people. He eyed her curiously, "Robo-call? I hate those." He folded his arms neatly over his chest, eyes grazing over the glitz and glamor of the casino around him. Tommy might find it all to be quite impressive if it wasn't all a thin veneer attempting to mask the dark and ugly truth—about Coyote's Rest and about every single person here. They could dress up in their Sunday best and feign camraderie all they wanted, but the ugly truth of it all was just around the corner. He wondered how long it'd take for the mask to slip. "So... " he started, shaking himself out of his thoughts, "...how's the night treating you so far? Enjoying the festivities?"

[slamina]

𝔩𝔬𝔠𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫: the lucky coyote

𝔣𝔱. anyone !! capped 0/3

The Lucky Coyote felt different tonight.

Not because of the decorations, the expensive liquor flowing like water, or the fact that every gang in Coyote's Rest had somehow agreed to occupy the same building without immediately trying to kill one another. No, it was the tension that made the air feel heavier. The kind that settled beneath the laughter and music like a second heartbeat.

Taz liked tension. Tension made people predictable.

Leaning against the polished wood of the casino bar, a glass of bourbon balanced loosely between his fingers, he watched the room with the easy attention of someone who appeared completely relaxed while noticing everything. Familiar faces drifted through the crowd alongside strangers he hadn't learned yet. Old rivals shared tables. Alliances were being tested. Friendships were being repaired or ruined over drinks. Somewhere, someone was probably already violating at least three of the casino's carefully laid-out rules.

The anniversary celebration was supposed to be about unity. Fifty years of peace—or at least the closest thing Coyote's Rest ever got to it.

Taz wasn't cynical enough to think that meant nothing. He just wasn't naïve enough to think it meant everything either.

A faint smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth as he took a sip from his glass. Around him, slot machines chimed, cards slapped against felt, and conversations rose and fell in waves. For one night, everyone was expected to play nice. Which, in his experience, usually made things far more interesting. His gaze drifted toward the nearest open seat before settling on whoever happened to be lingering nearby. "Tell me," he said casually, gesturing vaguely toward the crowd with his glass, "is it just me, or does this feel less like a celebration and more like everyone's waiting for somebody to do something stupid?" The smile that followed was easy and familiar. "Not that I'm complaining. Stupid people are usually how I make my money." He lifts his glass slightly in invitation. "So. What's your poison tonight? Gambling, drinking, people-watching, or are you one of those terrifying individuals actually here for the speeches?"

[ncptunian]

"Well I'm not." Tommy blurted rather defensively, a pointer finger dug into the middle of his chest. Despite his distaste with the idea of the most dangerous people in Coyote's Rest congregating like this, he wasn't about to slip up. Not tonight. His brand of chaos was meant to be fun and maybe land him in the country jail for a night or two. Shit would get serious real quick if it got stirred up tonight. Even Tommy, who was often blissfully unbothered with the delicate web tangled between the gangs, could see that. "...Gonna do anything stupid, that is." He cleared his throat, "Why? did someone say something to you?" He cocked a brow at the man opposite him before his gaze swept over the patrons of the casino. "I mean c'mon, I even dressed up. This shirt has buttons and everything." He motioned to the itchy, tight dress shirt covering his torso. It was slightly wrinkled, but still beat his usual hole-ridden, grease-stained t-shirts. "Nah, no poison for me. I'm being an upstanding citizen." He'd taken a shot of whatever half-empty liquor bottle he'd rummaged out of his cupboard, sure, but that was for nerves. He scrunched his nose up at the mere mention of speeches. "Speeches? Ugh. What's the point? I mean what are we trying to accomplish?" His words didn't sound angry, just skeptical. "...It's bullshit, right?"

[lustcannibalism]

they invented a new low just for me

[linkinmoon]

Franz Kafka, The Diaries of Franz Kafka

[ncptunian]

⸻ hey, wait a second— i could swear that was TOMMY KUROSAWA that just walked past. don’t tell me you haven’t heard of the STREET RACER of THE JACKALS? they’ve been a member for SEVEN YEARS and apparently they’re actually LOYAL, so make sure not to forget this time. i’ve heard they’re known as THE THRILLSEEKER, and i can tell you for sure that they’re RESOLUTE and ADAPTABLE on a good day, but i don’t think you’d like to see them when they’re VAIN and FOOLHARDY. rumour has it that they LOST THEIR MAJOR LEAGUE FOOTBALL PROSPECTS DUE TO A RECKLESS DRIVING RELATED INJURY but i don’t know if anyone has ever lived long enough to confirm it. either way, most people would use THIS TOO SHALL PASS by YOUNG THE GIANT to describe them, as well THE COLD SWEAT OF ADRENALINE, FADED PINE SCENTED AIR FRESHENER, OIL STAINS ON AN OLD WHITE T-SHIRT. god only knows how they ended up here, but love them or hate them, they’re not going anywhere.

— THE BASICS.

full name: tommy kurosawa

nicknames: tom

age & birthday: april 2, 1997 (29)

gender identity & pronouns: male, he/him

gang & role: street racer for the jackals

born: marin, tx (fictional)

orientation: heterosexual

— FAMILY.

parents: gene & hanako kurosawa (estranged)

siblings: scott kurosawa (whereabouts unknown)

pets: herbie the cat

— APPEARANCE.

face claim: mackenyu arata

height: 5'10

eye colour: dark brown

hair colour: black

— PERSONALITY.

positive traits: ambitious, self-willed, tenacious, independent, sociable, spontaneous (if we want to put a positive spin on it), perceptive

negative traits: impulsive, restless, prone to mood swings, insensitive, defiant

label: the thrillseeker / a person who enjoys taking part in extreme sports and other activities involving physical risk

hobbies: working on cars, racing

mbti type: estp (the entrepreneur)

moral alignment: chaotic neutral

character parallels: tim riggins (friday night lights), dean winchester (supernatural), flynn rider (tangled), bart simpson (the simpsons. i had to add this one bc it made me laugh)

— PAST.

tommy was born and spent the majority of his upbringing in a small town in texas. it all started off pretty normal. he had hardworking parents, his mom immigrated from japan, his dad a first generation american. his dad was a stern businessman who worked high up in an office building, that's all tommy knew, anyway. he had one sibling, an older brother, scott, a few years older than him. by the time scott had reached high school, he'd developed a pretty rebellious streak. he was one of those kids in school that was known to everyone, and not for good reason. he was always getting into some form of trouble. the kurosawas breathed a sigh of relief when he eventually graduated and got accepted into college.

tommy, however, was the opposite. he wanted nothing more than to make his parents proud. he'd seen the dozens and dozens of times they had answered the phone to find that scott had done something new this time; set fire to something—got into a fist fight, called a teacher some unrepeatable expletive—and he certainly did not want to follow in those footsteps. he wanted to be the source of pride in the family.

marin was a football town through and through (think friday night lights, varsity blues, etc.). the high school football team was the pride of everyone there, and no one was missing from the crowded stands of the football field during game day. tommy was always drawn to it all, more than the sport it was the atmosphere around it. the excitement, the thrill, the adrenaline. tommy's best childhood friend's dad was the coach of the team, and encouraged tommy to tryout for j.v. if he was serious about it.

tommy thought this was gonna thrill his parents. namely his dad. he'd grown considerably more strict after scott, in his dad's words, gone down the wrong path. after dropping out of college, scott had become a regular at the local jail in marin—burglary, possession, grand theft auto, arson—you name it, scott probably had it on his wrap sheet. so when he told them at the dinner table that night, he was surprised to see his dad's face twist into disgust when he told him. it was a frivolous, unnecessarily dangerous waste of time, his dad had told him. he wasn't going to allow his only 'good son' to do something so stupid and wind up injuring himself. he wanted tommy to follow in his own footsteps, and he wasn't going to be any good at business if he had sustained a brain injury.

despite his father's protests, and with a little convincing from his soft-hearted mom and the coach, tommy tried out and made it onto the team. although his father would consistently remind him and his mom that it wasn't a good idea and that they'd see when tommy ended up injured. tommy, however, was undeterred. he was gonna show his dad and once he would see how good he was, he'd change his mind.

unfortunately for tommy, all through high school and eventually, when he made quarterback of the high school team, he had never gained that respect. he worked hard. he had excellent grades to top it off. he was popular among his peers. he kept a clean record. he had ambitions for college and in his wildest dreams, the nfl. and he was that good, at least by the standards of everyone in marin. he was tommy the quarterback. the star player. he seemed to have the respect of everyone except the one person he needed it from. he'd look over and see his mom decked out in cougar colors, cheering, and even though it made him happy, he couldn't help but feel the absence of his dad next to her. they were hearing from scott less and less now, the last they'd heard he followed one of his less than respectable friends 'out west' for a good oppurtunity to earn some cash. it was putting a huge strain on his parents' relationship. even his bubbly, glass half full mom was starting to falter. her husband saw scott as a lost cause while she still held out hope that he'd come home any day now. tommy would overhear their hushed conversations about divorce.

it all came to a head during his senior year. less than a week before the big champion game. there'd be college scouts there. during practice he kept slipping up—missing passes, tripping. he was off his game big time and everyone wondered why. with all the pressure and the problems at home constantly in the back of his mind, he thought he just needed one night to let loose. he knew some of the less dedicated guys on the team would get up to no good on the weekends. he never partook, but this was what he insisted he needed. cut to the middle of the night when he really should've been recovering, he was flying down some random backroad in the passenger side of a teammate's beat up old car. it happened in a split second—they spun out and hit a tree right on tommy's side. tommy was hurt, but besides that somehow, miraculously, everyone was mostly okay. a bit scraped up, maybe, but they'd escaped with their lives.

in the hospital, with his mom next to him, the doctor told them his shoulder injury would keep him from being able to play the championship game , and truthfully, ever play football again. his mom insisted that she wasn't angry with him, but he could see the disappointment written all over her face. he knew his dad's absence at the hospital that night was the 'i told you so' he had coming. he didn't need to raise his voice or lecture him about it. maybe he hadn't been injured on the field, but his dad would blame the sport all the same.

after that things started to unravel slowly but surely. his parent's divorced, his mom moved back to japan. he and his dad became more and more estranged until they stopped talking completely. tommy spent some time in community college, but just like his older brother, he dropped out. he had no one for a time.

he thought maybe if he was just like his brother (at least that's what his dad's voice in his head was always telling him) he'd find him and maybe connect with him. they were never really that close but maybe they could have some sort of relationship. be some sort of family.

he took one of the last tips they had gotten about scott's whereabouts, that he'd been somewhere outside of las vegas. he left texas and never turned back.

he landed in coyote's rest, completely unaware of the town's history. he would ask around about his brother, something he didn't know would raise eyebrows. maybe some of them took pity on him and mumbled a 'i don't know, maybe' when he handed them his picture, but the rest simply iced him out.

he can't recall how he'd ended up with the jackals, really. it was a blur of coming up on one of their street races, the buzzing crowd taking him back to his so-called glory days. it was the engine-revving, heart-thudding rush of adrenaline that had him immediately hooked. that one race took hold of him and gave him something to strive for for the first time in years.

really, it was remarkable that a twenty-two year old that exuded the aura of a sad, wet puppy and could hardly lift his right arm over his head was even able to convince the jackals to let him drive. maybe it was the crazed glint in his eye and unmistakable determination. but for the first time in a while, he had something to strive for. something to throw 110% percent of himself into. and the results showed it. he was good at racing. one might think it was luck or skill, but really it was his lack of regard for his safety that pushed him ahead. he had it in him to push the pedal harder, to take a riskier turn. whatever it took to feel that rush of adrenaline.

— PRESENT.

seven years later, tommy is still looking for his brother, kind of. he'll ask new people if they've ever met or heard of a scott kurosawa. he tries to follow the leads to eventual dead ends. he figures that his brother maybe doesn't want to be found. although he'd never say it out loud, scott might be dead for all he knows.

in his mind he's found his place with the jackals. they were only 3 years into it all when he joined so he's watched it all grow and transform into what it is today. so he sees it as some outrageous concept of a family to him. he's loyal to the jackals through and through, to a maybe unhealthy degree. with his real family torn apart and each piece of it scattered around god knows where, he's determined to not lose this one.

he lives off adrenaline, hence his attraction to street racing. outside of that he is constantly seeking cheap thrills and danger. he will provoke someone into a fight even knowing full well that he can't win, which is why he's often sporting some kind of bruise, welt, scrape, or scratch about his face. he likes to run his mouth in general, even if he doesn't actually mean what he says. just whatever he can do to tick someone off. i wouldn't say he's mean necessarily. more so just...annoying. he just wants to get a reaction most of the time.

in relationships, he dives head first. he will tell someone he loves them on the second date, fully not meaning it. he doesn't really have healthy relationships in general, so his romantic attachments aren't any better. if he really did have a true interest in someone, he'd spiral about it big time. in friendships, i'd say he's pretty social in general and can be easy to get along with (when he's not being a jackass). as long as everything stays at the surface level, he's having a great time. he doesn't want anyone to know him past that or really even know anyone past that. it's all about fun for him, so diving into any deep personal stuff has him running away like a bat out of hell.

he's a nuisance in general and sort of a loser (sorry tommy). he's good at racing, but outside of that, he drinks a lot and sleeps most of the day. he goes on runs at the crack of dawn (before his bedtime) and works out from time to time. he likes to watch horror movies. he likes to work on cars, a hobby he used to have with his dad a lifetime ago, so he'll help the mechanics out from time to time (or just get in their way and annoy them).

needless to say he's not the most useful member of the jackals. he's not doing any heavy lifting, literally or figuratively. in the back of his mind he knows that if he wasn't good at racing, he knows they'd probably throw him out on his ass, or worse. though since he started it all when the jackals were relatively new, so he hopes they'd at least keep him around based on that.

he has a cat he found abandoned and he named it herbie and he loves him big time. he's like look at this little guy isn't he great

i can't think of anything else but i struggled so much with mapping his whole thing out. i rewrote this maybe a hundred times. i don't really have any specific connections in mind, maybe someone who did know his brother at one time? idk if scott was once a member of a gang i haven't really figured that out yet but yeah!

[aratamackenyu]

Mackenyu as Naozumi Hiyama from Over Drive (2018)

[avoidantgh0st]

[pomeranian2]

[nocontextpsych]

[midsommars-deactivated20201109]

[the-wolfbats]

[marveldaily]

Daredevil Resurrection | 3.01