Heartsick

An independent and semi-selective Shinobu Kawajiri RP.

[ajasblood-blog]

“Misty, where were you last night?”

Well, my cousin and his roommate had not seen FMA (FMA:B in my cousin’s case), so my computer was being used for streaming. We got all the way to episode eleven.

In other news, here’s my schedule for the rest of the week. Lots of business.

My friend from across the country is going to be in town today, so I’m going to be busy with her. Might get some posts in earlier today, but unlikely to.

I have the viewing tomorrow. Will be emotional and busy.

Dad’s funeral is on Friday. Enough said there.

I may be able to be on  Saturday, may not. It depends on what’s going on and whose house I’m at. (Couch-surfing while this is going on.)

Won’t be on Sunday, since I have a shared birthday party with my brother.

[nekoscurse-blog]

Real time footage of @vigilcx

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She doesn’t know who these child mobsters are, but it looks like the sensitive one with the hat is gonna get wrecked.

[surgeoned-blog1]

Since these type of promos seem to be in right now, hello! I’m  a new independent Kira Yoshikage from part 8 of JJBA. Like or reblog this and I’ll check out ya blog? :0c Thanks!

[nekoscurse-blog]

townterror replied to your post: “Oh dear. I don’t know who this Kira person is,...

huh.

“Kosaku! Do you know what’s going on?”

[nekoscurse-blog]

“Oh dear. I don’t know who this Kira person is, but it sounds like they upset a lot of people!”

[nekoscurse-blog]

Not enough IC content on this blog. Time to fix that!

Like this post for a starter.

[nekoscurse-blog]

Really though, her recommended blogs aren’t even Jojo anymore. It’s all Silent Hill and Danganronpa. What kind of vibe am I giving all? I blame @fortuneshands

[nekoscurse-blog]

fortuneshands:

That venom was definitely unexpected. Foolish Yoshikage; you made another assumption.

He raised an eyebrow questioningly at her words, eyes betraying bemusement for a brief moment before flattening back out into unreadable black pools. Was this what Kosaku had been subject to before? His mind cranked back to the moment he first fumbled through the doors of the Kawajiri residence, and he briefly remembered Shinobu’s initial disdainful dismissal of his arrival. He had written it up to being something of a bad mood, but it seemed the emotional rift between the Kawajiris was far deeper than he had ever put thought into.

And now he had brought it back to the forefront, unintentionally.

He strode a little closer to her, closing whatever distance had been put between them, face completely devoid of any named emotion–before that horrible grin returned, expression twisting into something so out of character for the man whose face he was wearing that its very appearance told of the confidence Kira now carried with him.

“Is that so? Where is it, then?” He leered over her, deeply amused, before taking her hand in his and slowly rubbing over the silky flesh pulled over her knuckles with a practiced gesture. “Where is my congratulations? For overcoming the weak Kosaku of the past, shouldn’t you be happier?”

He chuckled mildly.

The sudden bit of coldness in her personality had made her much, much more interesting.

“Hayato must appreciate not having to listen to Papa and Mama arguing anymore, mm?”

With as many times as he had forced that child to endure the death spiral of Bites the Dust, he could only imagine the relief the boy had once Kira had left…and the lingering fear left in his place.

What a terrible little game this all was. He got closer and that painful little thing in her chest twisted. That old instinct told her to be made light by his presence, to be happy that he was talking to her, but she knew better. The mind and heart, although divided, were not completely separate beings. It was her mind that made his touch feel like tiny poison barbs as much as tantalizing sparks.

It was smarter to follow the mind than the heart, but they could not be entirely separated. There were bits of her heart that were silly enough to ignore, but the rest, the chunks darkened with anger and pain, that could be used. Unwanted remnants of emotion made what she was doing difficult. Those darkened sections of her heart and her mind’s whispered mornings made it possible.

The painful thing in her chest twisted, but Shinobu was able to keep her expression from changing. “Congratulations,” she dryly said. “I suppose even an offensive personality is better than none.” 

There was the slightest of pauses before her expression hardened slightly. He had no right to ask about Hayato. He had made it perfectly clear that he wanted nothing to do with him. “He’s doing fine,” she lied. “Strange of you to bring up arguing, though. Did you really count what you did as arguing?” As if he had the spine for a real fight. Even now, although he could hurt her, she imagined there was still something soft and weak inside.

Shinobu pulled her hand out of his grasp. It came as a relief to remove that touch which she was so aware of, although she did not show it. If only the absence of contact could continue. Instead, she reached to brush her hand against his cheek. Two could play at the game of false affection. “If only you weren’t so disappointing for so long.”

[rpmemesandmusings]

Send me “?” and i’ll write a starter for you that includes one of the following sentences, randomly generated. 1-152, ranges from fluff to angst.

Keep reading

[nekoscurse-blog]

Describe your muse on anon and my muse will say if they would date them or not.

Bonus: Include the basic details: gender, age, height, likes, dislikes, hair/eye color, race, and anything else my character should know.

[nekoscurse-blog]

❝ You're Hayato's mother, right? ❞ She looks like him, especially with her hair color and skin color. She has nothing particularly bad to say about him, but, since Budogaoka Middle & High School are combined, she has to pass him occasionally. She has no time to wait for the woman's response apparently, as she continues on with her words. ❝ He's very quiet and rarely talks to anyone, ❞ even to those who try to talk to him, ❝ why is that? ❞

Shinobu frowned. It was a slow downward twist of her mouth that ended in her sucking her lower lip slightly inward. She took in a deep breath the was exhaled as a sigh. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “He’s always been a quiet boy, but lately… it’s never been like this.” Hayato had been acting peculiar for the past few weeks. Along with being quieter, he seemed on edge and spent much more time in his room. That it had coincided with her husband’s much more pleasant change in behavior almost made it feel like some sort of bittersweet trade.

Brown eyes all but lit up as an idea sparked in the woman’s mind. Her frown was replaced by a hopeful smile. “Are you a friend of Hayato’s, miss… I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name. Did anything happen at school that could have upset him? Did you notice anything?” Where her voice had held fear for her child before, now there was hope. If this girl could provide an answer, perhaps she could help her son.

[nekoscurse-blog]

                                           Rules - Home

[whyamisweaty]

Grunkle Stan Sentence Starters

“Behold! The world’s most distracting object!”

“Now who wants to put on some blindfolds and get into my car?”

“My ex-wife still misses me…but her aim is gettin’ better!”

“Have you seen my pants?”

“For tonight’s final illusion, we have the incredible “Sack of Mystery.” When you put your money in, it mysteriously disappears!”

“Bodies change, honey. Bodies change…”

“I can’t find the remote and I refuse to stand up!”

“Can I scratch myself now?”

“The young people of this town want fun; I’ll smother ‘em with fun!”

“I will break you, little man!”

“When there’s no cops around, anything’s legal!”

“You know, studies show that keeping a ladder in the house is more dangerous than a loaded gun. That’s why I own ten guns, in case someone maniac tries to sneak in with a ladder.”

“My one and only dream, which was to possess money, has come true!”

“I was awoken by the sound of mockery. Where is it? Show me the object of ridicule!”

“You’re the light of my life too, pal.”

“Why is there a pig jumping out of my chest?!”

“Sorry. It’s just hard to focus on what you’re saying with that squeaky puberty voice you got there.”

“Thanks, beautiful woman. But I couldn’t have done it without my sidekick, Footbot.”

“I’m gonna teach this bear… to drive!”

“Sometimes, I think: Is this all there is? Is life just some kind of horrific joke without a punch line? That we’re all just biding our time until the sweet, sweet, release of death?”

“Yeah, nothing like sitting in a moist tub with strangers.”

“Yes! Burn the child!”

“Mm! Those cannibals are onto something. I taste delicious!”

“Look. It all begins with this little fella, the pituitary gland. He may be little, but he has big plans.”

“Finally, a good reason to punch a teenager in the face.”

“Darn beautiful men, always eating out of my trash… “

“He’s a fat, naked, jerk.”

“I’m not acting suspicious! You’re acting suspicious!”

“That picture’s taken out of context.”

“The entire lower half of your body is on fire.”

“My greatest achievement! Probably should’ve worn pants.”

“I don’t know what I’d do with myself if you got hurt on my watch.”

“They’re like pancakes, but they probably have some of my hair in them.”

“Is it legal for a child to wear that much make-up?”

“I don’t know, we’d have to break in and - Just kidding, let’s break in!!”

“Children fighting! I can sell this!”

“Sometimes, a man has to steal an animatronic badger to stay in this crazy game called life.”

“Can I have my hands back? I have a certain gesture I’d like to share with you.”

“You really think I’m a bad guy?”

“Wherever we go, we go together.”

“This is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen! And I once saw a dead rat floatin’ in a bucket!”

“Beep boop. I am a nerd robot. That’s you.That’s what you sound like.”

“I don’t need you! I don’t need anyone!”

“You ruined my life!”

“You really aren’t gonna thank me, are you?”

“Only a game designed by nerds would have “charisma” as a fantasy power.”

“For your information, I was gonna shoplift most of this.”

“I always say words that come out of my brain. If my head says, that lady’s got an ugly baby, my mouth says, ‘whoa, lady, you got one ugly baby.’”

“That llama knew too much.”

“So then I said to the bouncer, ‘Where’s your ID, ugly?’ That’s where I got this scar.”

“Oh, I seem to have lost my number! Can I borrow yours?”

“I don’t know. One minute we’re having the perfect date, and the next minute she’s growing extra legs and encasing me in webbing. Women, right?”

[nekoscurse-blog]

fortuneshands:

Assumptions were dangerous.

Kira had told himself this many times; it was a rule he lived by, and continued to live by, and perhaps only continued to live because he had followed that one rule so thoroughly. Being prepared for danger in unexpected forms was what allowed him to continue his simple, peaceful life.

However, assumptions were invited into one’s life by becoming lax and complacent…and Kira had slowly become complacent in his new, everyday life.

Shinobu Kawajiri, the woman whose life he had held in his hands and cast away like nothing more than the pawn she was, was still alive. And it would’ve been incredibly foolish to make the assumption that they could not meet again.

‘Kosaku’.

The name that was not his still perked his ears, rousing him from the trance induced by the regularity of his daily commute. It drew his thin, dark eyes from the ground to the woman, and for a moment his heart froze in place. He could continue walking. He could coldly and smugly throw her away once more. But for some reason…for some god-awful reason, he turned to her with a smile that could only be described as wicked. Why did he smile, anyway?

“Shinobu.” He glanced at his watch; he wouldn’t be late by simply exchanging a few words. Maybe if he crushed her heart completely, she’d run away with her head down and he could resume his life once more. “I didn’t think you could actually leave the house. Congratulations.”

It was like taking in a breath only to find that the fields of wildflowers you once stood in had turned into sandstorms. She knew that things wouldn’t be the same as they had once been, that they couldn’t be the same, but it still hurt. That smile alone was enough to put an uncomfortable weight on her chest. There was just something about it that was so undeniably wrong. When he spoke, his words reminded her of mysteriously exploding cactuses, showering her in spines and knocking her out. He had cared for her, once.

(She wouldn’t say that he loved her. Once she had thought so, for one shining summer, but now, she had no way of knowing if he ever did.)

This time, she didn’t fall unconscious, for there was no physical injury. That was good, because she knew that she couldn’t expect him to tend to emotional wounds, let alone physical ones. Fine. She could deal with that. Kosaku had gone for years without showing her affection. Shinobu would not give him the pleasure of succumbing to his barbs just because she had been giving a taste of love and he had found a spine for himself.

A dark look crossed her face. She smiled in a bitter, sarcastic way. It was a look that Kosaku would have recognized from their unhappy marriage if he was Kosaku. All Kira would have to go on was his first couple of days in the Kawajiri residence. What happened next, however, was new. In a scathingly condescending tone, Shinobu finally let herself say what she was thinking. “And I never thought you could find a personality within that empty shell of yours. You’re the one who should be congratulated.”

[nekoscurse-blog]

Why have two porn blogs followed Shinobu? Why? What have I written to signal them? Is it because I wrote the word ‘handfucker’? I need answers.

[nekoscurse-blog]

✜ - my muse collapses in front of yours, all bloodied and bruised.

It was an average day. If only what she now considered average was worse than what she used to. When she smiled, it wasn’t quite as wide. When something made her laugh, it felt hollower than it one had. Sometimes, she wondered if her eyes were duller when people looked into them. This had become her new normal somewhere along the way. Her quiet life. 

She still missed him. Even when she wasn’t thinking about him, there was a part of her that mourned. What exactly had happened during the summer of 1999 to make the man she had once thought boring into someone she loved? What had shaken her son so badly during that time? She supposed she might never know. Whatever the cause, it certainly hadn’t been an average summer.

Shinobu had been walking to the library when she heard the urgent whispers of a small group of people walking past her. They were moving with a surprising urgency. She furrowed her brow in confusion, but continued walking when she didn’t spot anything off. Probably gossips, she thought. It was when she turned the corner that she came face to face with the subject of said gossip.

Brown eyes widened in shock at the sight of the younger woman. It wasn’t her look, pretty edgy for Morioh, that got to her, but the state that she was in. Blood, bruises - this was clearly someone who had been in an ordeal. Shinobu took a step back without realizing it. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, the woman collapsed in front of her.

“Oh!” In an instant, the shock wore off. Whatever had happened to this girl, she was clearly hurt and in need of assistance. She hurried to crouch down beside her and attempt to pull her up. “We need to get you to the hospital. Can you wa-, no you just collapsed. Can you walk if I help you?” There were other important questions, like ‘what happened’, but making sure she wasn’t about to bleed out or anything was the first priority.