it’s gonna b under the cut
The uneven, bumpy texture of the plaster wall behind Desmond is felt though his thin shirt and hoodie as he steps back from Alex who approaches him slowly and methodically. An arm is raised, trapping Desmond in the corner he’s been backed into. The palm of Alex’s hand is placed gently against the wall, gentle with the knowledge of the true strength lying in wait underneath the human appearance. Alex isn’t looking him in the eye, seemingly distracted by a loose thread in the hem of Desmond’s jacket. The man was of course, currently panicking and trying to fight the anxiety that causes his heart to pick up pace.
The distraction is only momentary, and Desmond feels a drop of sweat drip down his back as his oversized shirt hangs loose. Alex’s eyes lock onto his, a carnivorous and harsh pale blue. Almost dead white.
Despite walking and locking Desmond into the corner, he didn’t feel any malice behind the movements. Alex was in a horrible breach of the concept of personal space, but it appears to be bothering them equally. Zues isn’t one to stay too close to people, out of personal safety for the most part. They’ve both been put out of their comfort zone; question is why Alex thought it’d be a fun idea to do this to them.
“You’re not afraid?” Alex breaks the silence first, peering from under his hood. His voice is low, rumble as though the man hasn’t drunk water in a week. Probably hasn’t.
The question hits Desmond’s brain a couple minutes after his ears. The adrenaline in his blood hasn’t prepared him for an answer, too focused on what he can see of Alex’s face. His skin had been flushed, warm with a fever when the parasite had been implanted in his shoulder a few days prior but now it’s regained its pallid color. Yet it still looked more alive when they first met.
Were circumstances different this closeness wouldn’t be out of place. Welcome even.
“Are you kidding?” Desmond laughs. “It’d be stupid to not be.”
“It would.” Alex nods in agreement, “Good to know there’s not just empty space between those ears of yours.”
The comment takes Desmond off guard and he barks out a laugh, head almost knocking into Alex’s chin as his head leans forward. Alex gives him a confused look, then a small smile as Desmond shifts to lean more comfortably against the wall. Now his heart sped up for a different reason.
“Okay, you’ve been spending too much time around Shaun.”
Alex lets out a small, quiet chuckle at that. The fabric of his clothing layers rustle as his shoulders shook slightly with the laugh.
“I guess running in terror would fit better,” the tone is a bit bitter. Sometimes it’s impossible to tell what Alex is thinking. He’s hard to predict in general.
“Not with the exit blocked, unless I feel like clotheslining myself.” Desmond shifts his eyes to the arm guarding his escape route. Blinking in surprise, Alex looks at his arm as though he just noticed the limb’s attachment to his own body. He yanks the arm away as though the wall suddenly burned to the touch, quiet in awkward silence.
The removal of the roadblock brings a little comfort to their close proximity. Desmond tries to convince his brain to calm down. Alex isn’t interested in hunting him down like the web he unfurled, and despite the tension his presence is a welcome one. He’s stoic, blunt, and a dick most of the time.
As if he’s unable to explain his own act of cornering Desmond, Alex finds a very interesting spot on the floor to stare at until Desmond regains his attention as he clears his throat.
Again, Alex seems to be at a loss for words, taking more than a moment to respond to the question.
“It doesn’t help that I haven’t manage to put it into words yet.” He thinks out loud, not making eye contact yet. The silence remains a moment longer, starting and stopping a few times. Normally Desmond would call that stammering, but it feels weird applying that to Alex.
“I don’t think I should be around you.” He finally says, though the frown he gives himself afterward causes Desmond to doubt.
“…You gonna kill me or something?” Desmond jokes nervously.
“No,” Alex shakes his head, “I won’t.”
“Since I woke up it’s been a shitload of trouble, to put it mildly.” He watches Desmond carefully as he listens attentively. “Alex Mercer was murderous idiot and all that’s left of me is this.” Black and red tendrils extend and ripple through his body as he gestures to himself. “I’m stuck putting together a puzzle that keeps getting get people killed, one that broke long ago. All I have is a sister who looks at me like I’m a stranger, and I am.”
The loss hidden in that admission would be lost on anyone else, but he trusts Desmond.
This is a strange conversation to have on a rooftop. A monster confessing his humanity. Desmond shifts uncomfortably from the vulnerability, and how much he believes the words he hears. He shouldn’t have that much confidence, or so Alex seems to be trying to convince him. It might’ve been a good idea, a week ago.
“But I don’t feel like a stranger around you.” Alex keeps going. “You talk to me and I know who I am in that moment. You said you’re afraid of me, but you’re still here, you haven’t told me to fuck off.” He waves his hand at Desmond who jumps slightly at the gesture. “I don’t want to take advantage of your trust in me.”
“People don’t generally ‘accidentally’ take advantage of others.” Desmond licks his dry lips nervously after he speaks up. Alex gives him a blank stare, still looking lost in thought.
“There’s another thing.” He starts again with a frown. Hesitant to bring his thoughts to light. “I’m jealous of you. You’ve been through hell and back again and still remain standing. You’re selfless and kind regardless of it. And you’re on my mind even when my thoughts should be elsewhere.”
“Waaaiit,” Desmond’s eyebrows raise in surprise and he asks, “dude do you have a crush on me?”
“If you want to put it that way, yes.” Alex gives him one of his signature scowls, a wrinkle forming between his furrowed eyebrows. “I think you’re a damn good person, which is impossible to find in this city. And you’re… like the sun when I look at you.” Were he anyone else they might look embarrassed, but Alex’s eyes instead shift to the hallway door that the other assassins could come through at any moment, looking ready to bolt.
“Oh.” Desmond’s usual conversational fallback of sarcasm abandons him, freezing on the spot as his face catches on fire. “I… Hmm.”
The sound of approaching footsteps reaches his ears, though Alex doesn’t seem to acknowledge it. He’s too focused in watching Desmond with his intense gaze. There’s a time limit on his response or they’ll both be running out of the room like startled alley cats.
He’s not opposed to the attraction. It’s mutual, it’s welcome. It’s a relief that he wasn’t imagining things between them. Shaun will probably smack him upside the head, getting attached to their dangerous guest.
Maybe it’s the fact they’re both out of touch with who they’re supposed to be, finding something familiar in each other. They’re supposed to be dead, after all.
“Maybe the feeling’s mutual.” Desmond mumbles as the footsteps get closer, his ears burning as he looks away.
“I… What?” Alex takes a step forward, reaching a hand out to touch Desmond’s arm.
He recoils just as quickly when the door’s handle clicks and opens to reveal Shaun and Rebecca. They give a short greeting, rushing to set down the heavy supplies in their arms down. Alex seems to catch on for the reason to Desmond’s hesitance, eyes watching him and the other two carefully.
Shaun steps away to let Rebecca sort things out to her satisfaction before trying to grab something out of their haul. It gives him the chance to notice the awkward air hanging in the room, or maybe he noticed on the way in and is trying to play the fool.
“Afternoon fellas.” Eyeing Alex, Shaun walks up to his flustered companion. “Everything alright?” The question is aimed at Desmond, all but ignoring the other party. He probably thinks they walked into an argument between the two. God knows, if anyone is expecting hell to break loose again at every moment it’s Shaun.
Tucking his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, Desmond lets himself relax before Shaun will relax. He gives him a small, hopefully reassuring, smile. If Shaun and Rebecca think things are getting too tense Alex will lose a place to be safe. A place for both of them to be.
“Yeah, we’re fine.” Desmond looks over to Alex who stands back in the corner, quiet and watching. He nods his head towards the door, hoping he’ll get the hint. “I think we’re just going to get some fresh air on the roof.” Catching on, Alex nods heading for the doorway and pausing to wave back at Rebecca when she yells out a simultaneous greeting and goodbye.
“Alright…” Caught off guard, Shaun blinks back in surprise. “Do I need to be worried? Because you know I will be either way, but I still have to ask.”
“Not this time.” Desmond rolls his eyes, perhaps too comfortable with the monster of Manhattan. There’s hardly a reason to be scared at the moment. Unconvinced, Shaun stares at him warily, before giving up with a sigh and discreetly passing the headset from his ear.
“Just in case you go somewhere further than the roof.” Shaun says quietly as he heads back to his corner of the room, pictures of different pirate flags and documents littering the space.
Desmond looks at the earpiece with a shrug, shutting the device off on his way out so neither of his nosey friends could gossip to themselves. ‘Better safe than sorry when it comes to your coworkers’ might as well be a new creed at this point.
He walks to the front door, waving at Rebecca as he passes by with her giving him an odd look as he heads out into the hallway. The hall is empty, hinting that Alex is either waiting for him on the roof or took off. He wouldn’t blame him, nor would Alex hate him for turning right back around. The two of them could pretend nothing happened. If Alex ever came back after something like that.
Walking up the stairwell to the heavy roof door Desmond barely hesitates, twisting the knob and pushing, the rusty hinges squealing loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear. On the other side Alex is standing off to the side turning his gaze down from the sunset sky as he hears the door open.
“You like me?” Alex mimics the tone Desmond uses when he tends to try and tease everyone. A glint of laughter even lights up his eyes, and Desmond can’t help but laugh at the gesture. The ridiculousness of getting walked in on and now this out of character behavior.
“Ha ha.” He laughs again sarcastically, walking the two of them around to the more hidden shadows of the rooftop. A small comfort to hide them from any helicopters passing overhead. Alex smiles at him, warm from his time spent with all of the assassins. Very endearing. Desmond’s gaze darts away as his cheeks heat up. Doesn’t help when Alex closes in on him again which causes his heart to race once again.
“Did you mean it?” Alex asks, tilting his head to the side causing sunlight to shine under the usual dark shadow of his hood. The sunset makes his eyes look almost gold. “I don’t mean to corner you,” he registers his close proximity to Desmond, “not literally, in this case.” All but in the same position as they were a moment ago.
“I wouldn’t joke like that.” Shaking his head, Desmond relaxes this time in their closeness. “I might be a little bit of a flirt, but I don’t wanna lead people on.” For a time Ezio might’ve rubbed off on him, especially when their minds were more mixed in Italy. His team didn’t hold it over him either way.
“Pfft, I was hoping you would think of something.” Desmond folds his arms, unsure what else to do with them. He turns to look at the sunset Alex had been watching, and the smokey red haze above a nearby nest turns the disappearing sky bloody. Hopefully they wouldn’t have to move house, they’d have no choice but to trash the Animus.
“Last person I liked I ended up killing.” He’s compartmentalized his pain, all of his regret but no desire to make himself sick with guilt. A thousand simulated killings gave him a good perspective of being able to move on.
“I think I’m safe from that.” Desmond brings his eyes back to Alex as he speaks, giving him a slight smile.
Reaching out a hand Desmond grabs the loose edge of Alex’s jacket, tugging him to come closer and wrapping his arms around him and leaning their heads together. The gray hood on Alex’s gets pushed back in the movement and he relaxes into the touch.
The contact is nice. It’s probably the most calm the two of them have been for weeks.
Maybe it’s a natural outcome when their mouths meet in a kiss, Desmond sighing through his nose. There’s no real reason for them to rush in this moment, just soft kisses alone on the roof top. A little bit of selfishness in the apocalypse.
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