Peaches and Plums, motherfucker

Do you love magic? Is it in your soul? Kat. 28. Scorpio. Bisexual. Poet. Aspiring author. Wendy Darling in disguise. Survivor of the 40th timeline. “The moment you doubt wether you can fly, you cease forever to be able to do it.”

[neverlandmagician]

The Magicians Characters as WWDITS Quotes

Julia:

(Shadless) “You’re supposed to support me when I want to murder people!”

(Shadless) “You’re not really supposed to do that, but I was bored.” (Regarding the trees)

“Professor Pig Dick.”

“Did this bitch just say what I think he said?”

“🎵My intelligence is a ten, and yours are three and fours, it’s not my fault you stupid motherfuckers, it’s yours🎵”

Quentin:

“I’m not positive what my deal is either, so I just keep on truckin’”

“It says here that I am 100% white.”

“Guillermo (Quentin), get the dildos. Guillermo, try the dildos. Guillermo, how are the dildos? …They’re fine.”

“I love you so much you stupid bitch!”

“Some of them are girl wives, and some of them are boy wives.”

“Siri, play some New Jersey music.” *livin’ on a prayer starts playing*

Eliot:

“Laszlo (Eliot) doesn’t suck, and if he did, he certainly wouldn’t do it backwards!”

“I’ll be honest, my lookalike is kinda giving me a chub.”

“Starting tomorrow, Colin Robinson’s (Eliot Waugh’s) motto is young, dumb, and full of cum.”

“I’d go myself, but I can’t be fucked.”

“There’s a fucking ghost on the front lawn!”

“I thought the boy was a dud. Turns out, he’s got the groove.”

Margo:

“Pablo Picasso? More like Pablo Picasshole.”

“You need to stop talking about the fucking sea.”

“You make think you’re in love, you dumb fuck, but you’re not.”

“Fucking Mike.”

“Even worse, we don’t have a gun.”

Penny:

“Hey, dipshit.”

“What are you talking about? He’s not a wild card. He’s the card you get on the top of the deck, that has the instructions on it, so you throw it away.”

“A bit of sass from the boy.”

Alice:

“Come on you stinky bitch, the library’s open.”

“He’s as crazy as a wax banana.”

“This is lovely, but I’m on fire.”

Kady:

“I swear I am going to rip that man into shreds and make a dress out of it, and go to his family’s house, and say you like this? This is your son and I’m wearing him as a dress!”

“Your name is like a weak ejaculation.”

“Off you fuck.”

“I need to borrow your credit card and not tell you why.”

Josh:

“Go be immortal at brunch.”

“Because he’s my best friend, he’s my pal. He’s my homeboy, my rotten soldier. He’s my sweet cheese, my good time boy.”

“I agree with the werewolf slut.”

“I can speak 14 languages as long as they’re all English.”

Fen:

“We sent 500 ravens (rabbits)! It was very rude that you didn’t send one back!”

“That’s the stairmaster, the master of the stairs.”

(Trying to use a computer) “Arise! Arise! What is arise again? Ctrl, alt, 7?”

“I was just trying to read my email, I didn’t know there was a curse!”

Bonus, The Beast:

“I was Jack the Ripper.”

[wherestheaction]

i cannot believe that nobody is talking about this

[neverlandmagician]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Quentin has always had the belief that as good as people can be, they are also inherently selfish. That at the end of the day, no matter how much someone may love another person, they will always put themselves first.

He’s always believed in magic, that was easy. But he’s always had a very hard time believing in people.

So, you can’t really blame him for his genuine belief about the scars. He’s always believed that the life changed in telling a lie was your own. That above all, it would effect the one doing the lying more than anyone else, thus changing that persons life.

He realizes, now, seeing Eliot looking at him with so much fear and love, sees Julia roaring, trying to get to him, sees Alice lying in a heap on the floor, sees Margo missing a hand but still fighting with everything she has in her, that he’s wrong.

Or, an AU in which when you tell a life altering lie, a scar appears on your body.

[neverlandmagician]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Quentin has always had the belief that as good as people can be, they are also inherently selfish. That at the end of the day, no matter how much someone may love another person, they will always put themselves first.

He’s always believed in magic, that was easy. But he’s always had a very hard time believing in people.

So, you can’t really blame him for his genuine belief about the scars. He’s always believed that the life changed in telling a lie was your own. That above all, it would effect the one doing the lying more than anyone else, thus changing that persons life.

He realizes, now, seeing Eliot looking at him with so much fear and love, sees Julia roaring, trying to get to him, sees Alice lying in a heap on the floor, sees Margo missing a hand but still fighting with everything she has in her, that he’s wrong.

Or, an AU in which when you tell a life altering lie, a scar appears on your body.

[neverlandmagician]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Quentin has always had the belief that as good as people can be, they are also inherently selfish. That at the end of the day, no matter how much someone may love another person, they will always put themselves first.

He’s always believed in magic, that was easy. But he’s always had a very hard time believing in people.

So, you can’t really blame him for his genuine belief about the scars. He’s always believed that the life changed in telling a lie was your own. That above all, it would effect the one doing the lying more than anyone else, thus changing that persons life.

He realizes, now, seeing Eliot looking at him with so much fear and love, sees Julia roaring, trying to get to him, sees Alice lying in a heap on the floor, sees Margo missing a hand but still fighting with everything she has in her, that he’s wrong.

Or, an AU in which when you tell a life altering lie, a scar appears on your body.

[neverlandmagician]

Two sneak peeks of an AU, I guess. Not sure how I’m feeling about this one.

[neverlandmagician]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Completely forgot about posting chapter 2 of Whenever You’re Ready

[neverlandmagician]

Been a while.

I’m not sure if anyone is interested, but I’ve started a Good Place Magicians AU. Chapter one is up.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[neverlandmagician]

Remember when I was salty about the fact that the writers didn’t let margo grieve Quentin? Well.

[neverlandmagician]

So, for those of you who read one or both of these fics: this is regarding my stories “I Am Also a We” and “Like a River Flows”

I promise I’m working on them, they aren’t abandoned, I’ve just had a hard time working on them, especially I Am Also a We because I have a very specific idea of where I want the story to go, but it’s been hard to get it down in writing. I know how disappointing it can be when an author doesn’t update a story for basically a year so I’m very sorry to those who have a strong interest in either of those stories. But I promise they aren’t abandoned.

I’m writing the next chapter of I Am Also a We as we speak and I’m not promising anything, but I’m hoping to have it up before the end of the month.

[neverlandmagician]

Nobody can convince me that Julia didn’t absolutely body everyone in welters in the 39 other timelines

[neverlandmagician]

So, uh, I was on Pinterest looking for pictures of episodes, and Josh’s hookup board showed up, and I zoomed in and..is-is that a string connected from Margo to Fen? Or is it just showing they both had hooked up with Eliot?

Because if it is..well holy shit what did I miss with Fargo?

[neverlandmagician]

If I hypothetically wrote a fic about Quentin wanting to kiss Eliot for the first time at the top of a Ferris wheel but everything goes wrong and I titled it “Quentin and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad date” with some Margo/Julia wingwomen scenarios would anyone read it?

Hypothetically

[neverlandmagician]

Does anyone know what episode this picture is from? I thought maybe it was her dress montage in season 5 episode 1 but it’s not.

[neverlandmagician]

Honestly I just thought about this and it’s so dumb but I can’t stop laughing at the idea

Jon, meeting Dany’s dragons for the first time

Dany: And this is Drogon

Jon, nodding: Dragon

Dany: No, Drogon

Jon: Dragon

Dany: no..not dragon! Drogon! Say it it with me: dro

Jon: Dro

Dany: Gon

Jon: Gon

Dany: Drogon

Jon: Dragon

Dany: Gods you really do know nothing

[neverlandmagician]

The magicians as the umbrella academy quotes:

Julia:

“We didn’t choose this life, were just living in it”

“The clock is ticking on doomsday. Just tell me that when I need you, you’ll be ready”

“Not that apocalypse, this is a new one”

Quentin:

“(Describing Penny) Think batman but aim lower”

“If you’re raised to believe nothing about you is special, if the benchmark is extraordinary, what do you do if you’re not?”

“If you believe in yourself, just once, great things are gonna happen for you”

“Can you hug me as I go? It’s been a while”

Margo:

“You are depriving some village of their idiot”

“I know it’s impossible, but did all of us get sexier?”

“I can teach you to shave like a big boy”

Eliot:

“Dad, could you stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment?”

“I’m the daddy here!”

“Who I am is not a disease”

Kady:

“He’s dead! Yay!”

“I know what it’s like to love dangerous people. Difference is they love me back”

“Julia, (Vanya) of all people you should hate Dean Fogg (dad) the most”

Penny:

“I’m just gonna go murder mom, I’ll be right back”

“What the hell did we do this time?”

“You are an open book written for very dumb children”

Alice:

“I think maybe you’re the only person who really knows who I am and still likes me”

“When something seems too perfect, it’s usually anything but”

“Why can’t I control myself like the rest of you guys?”

Fen:

(When she was a ghost) unfortunately ghosts can’t time travel”

“I need to find my family”

Josh:

“My cult is going to be so pissed..I told them we had until 2019”

“I need a hit of sucrose, I’m heading to the vending machine”

Bonus, Dean Fogg:

“What would possess me to adopt seven ill-mannered malcontents?”

[neverlandmagician]

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully describe how I’m feeling about the finale but one thing can I say is this:

I am so, so happy Fitz was wrong.

Not just about the “theres a 0% chance we’ll ever be in the same room again” but about the fact that:

They are not cursed.

Not a single one of them.

They are all, so incredibly, indescribably, blessed.