Did you know...

...the Martians still scare their young with stories of Teddy Roosevelt? Or that there is a Viking colony on Ceres? Nobody knows how it got there.

[neviditelny]

This is my tag-finding post.

[mildmayfoxe]

1) any stretching is better than no stretching

2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable

3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are

[fruitsoftheweb]

Damage prediction on pears during transportation.

[hollowtones]

bad and naughty children get put in The Pear Wiggler to atone for their crimes

[thebibliosphere]

I can’t help but feel like the the human condition would be greatly improved by the ability to remove our spines, whip them around to get the kinks out, and put them back in again.

[thebibliosphere]

Three responses to this post:

Chronic pain people: Oh mood.

The gays: I too wish for the intimacy of someone removing my spine

The people focusing entirely too much on the word ‘kink’: Heh. Kink.

[meret118]

4 responses: For some reason I was thinking spines like a porcupine, and was very confused at first.

[thebibliosphere]

Valid.

[netherworldpost]

"does it have to be queer"

yes, next question, unless the next question is "why", in which case I am pulling the lever

[sea-salted-wolverine]

Could it be more queer?

[netherworldpost]

(To my personal assistant) Increase the sea salted wolverine’s budget

[bisexualrozanov]

Psychological warfare à la Louis de Pointe du Lac

+ bonus:

[victusinveritas]

[naughtypiggy]

Scientists uncovered the nutrients bees were missing — Colonies surged 15-fold

Scientists have developed a breakthrough “superfood” for honeybees by engineering yeast to produce the essential nutrients normally found in

TLDR- Modern agriculture pollen is low in nutrients, and there aren’t enough wildflowers. Science has to develop vitamins to supplement the diets of agricultural bees. So plant some wildflowers for the wild bees near you.

[heydocverdant]

you’ve heard of vitamin B, now get ready for bee vitamins

[luulapants]

My elderly father started talking about how frustrating he finds “the pronouns thing” and I was like. Oh no. He had such a good stand on this, he’s been they/them-ing his cishet siblings for god’s sake! Is he regressing?? And he was talking about how difficult it is to remember, and how onerous it feels to expect strangers to keep track of it, and I’m like oh no oh no.

Then he says, “I mean, the problem isn’t the gender thing. The problem is four words: she, her, he, and him. We got rid of stewardess and turned it into flight attendant. It doesn’t matter if the flight attendant is a man or woman, so we got rid of it. We just need to get rid of those. I don’t need to know.”

“You don’t need to know… people’s gender?”

“No. I don’t care, I don’t need to know, and I don’t want to remember it.”

So we can relax. It’s just a continuation of his crusade to they/them the world. He doesn’t want to remember anyone’s gender. He’s abolishing the genders.

[teaboot]

Your dad is so powerful

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

generally speaking, the cooler and better your offline political activities are, the more important it becomes that you do not post about it on your personal social media acconts

[unexpectedphilosophy]

[thememedaddy]

[becquerel]

i love when people on the internet get denied stuff and you find the most innovative minds of the generation dedicated to making goddamn sure other people get what they want come hell or high water

[becquerel]

[sorrow-hollow]

Okay but I get this. All of you worms who have things blocked on your wifi or whatever and have IbisPaint this is how you do it

Open IbisPaint go to a canvas (any canvas, or make. a new one)

Select the font tool (if you don’t know what or where that is, press the tool icon (normally a paint brush or eraser) and press the T button

From there you should be able to create a text box (writing is not important…). Find the font button and add a new font. I can’t remember what it’s called but you’ll know when you see it

It’ll automatically search for you “free fonts.” Do not follow this. Your app is misdirecting you. Instead search up whatever it is you’re looking for in the search bar, and that should work

Knowledge should not be trapped behind bars, bend and break them until you can grasp it

[talesfromthecrypts]

Walking backwards into my future.

Mārama (2025) dir. by Toa Stappard

[catmask]

i love when pets huff or sigh dramatically. like i am sorry. you're so right. you live such a laborious life. it must be so difficult to take naps and get pet and fed treats and played with all day. really a packed schedule youve got there boss. how do you manage it all. well no matter i'd say it's time for your well earned 7th afternoon nap

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

let's put Scooby and the gang in a genuine horror movie situation, i wanna see what these freaks are truly capable of

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

"didn't they already do this with—" no. put them in a slasher film. put them in a BLOODBATH. put this van full of weirdoes in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre scenario i have FAITH in them

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

THEY'D DO WELL IN SAW

[batneko]

okay I'm thinking about this

not Saw specifically but a slasher with a legit body count. Summer camp slashers are overplayed but I think it really works because it's the type of thing the Scooby gang WOULD get caught up in.

like some of the counselors didn't show up (got got) so the head counselor calls his younger cousin to see if him and his friends can fill in last minute. They show up and they're a bunch of nerds, one of them even has an anxiety dog, and they don't have a big role at first. It seems like the movie is setting them up as cannon fodder.

and then the deaths start and suddenly the nerds are locked the fuck in. The little one with the glasses actually fixed the phone line and is taking stock of all their supplies in case the vehicles go out. The counselor's cousin who seemed like a himbo has set up a perimeter and made makeshift alarms for all the doors and windows, knows all the entry points. The anxious one and his dog are keeping the mood up with the snacks and activities that were supposed to be for the kids, making sure nobody panics and starts making dumb decisions. Somebody tried to grab the redhead and she flipped him over and had him zip-tied before anybody noticed. Weren't they a D&D group or something? What is happening???

[lizardlicks]

Fuck the slasher movie just effectively becomes Home Alone but with Four Kevin McAllisters

Bro's fucked.

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

art by Daviddv1202

[dawen]

at one point the kid with the anxiety dog says, "man, why does this keep happening? this is, like, the eighth time thid year!"

it's barely June. abruptly all the normal councilors understand a) why he has an anxiety dog, and b) why the dog has anxiety too.

[thethirdromana]

Putting the term "Catholic guilt" on a high shelf where fandom can't reach it until everyone learns how to identify characters who are very very clearly coded as Protestant.

[queer-crows-nightmare]

[corporaloretsev]

"Good for you!"