New Farmer

Pfp from Stardew Valley Character Creator © 2023 by Poltergeister & Jaz, licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0.

[newfarmersdv]

Just started a new run-through of stardew valley and enjoyed the idea of the farmer liveblogging.

We'll see how that goes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[newfarmersdv]

sorry I went AWOL, I've been kinda shell shocked the last few days.

So, I do a lot of small jobs around town, and like a week ago the mayor asked me if I could find his "shorts" (I accepted bc he offered hella money, but genuinely wtf. I can't imagine willingly talking about my underwear with anyone, let alone both [admitting I'd lost it] and [ASKING THEM TO LOOK FOR IT])

Fast forward to 3 days ago, when I'm hanging out w the town's other farmer in her room, and I SEE THEM UNDER HER DRESSER (I know this reads like a stretch, but he described them as purple and covered in stars. that shit's not common)

So anyway I'm currently mid-crisis because:

Do I ask her about it?

Do I TAKE THEM BACK?? (remember the money)

Do I tell him? (I'm heavily leaning towards no, but idk what to do if I end up returning them)

Do I tell her about the job?

Also I have to figure out how to hold them if I take them

I REALLY don't want to talk to this man about anything that could relate to underwear

So yeah any advice would be much appreciated because genuinely I have no idea how tf to go forward

TL;DR: mayor asked me to find his undies (gross) and they're in my friends room. Fml.

[skieslitbystars]

put them in the soup

[newfarmersdv]

When I asked for advice I meant to help solve the crisis, not drastically increase my levels of internal distress and turmoil 😭😭😭

New crisis questions:

Why is the soup a proper noun. What soup. Where.

Who is "them"? Farmer friend? Mayor? Both? Underpants? All?

How would I get the manpower to put humans in soup

How would this improve the situation

Honestly mostly still stuck on the concept of The Soup

Any advice from not this person would be appreciated because now I somehow have less clue how to go forward

[newfarmersdv]

sorry I went AWOL, I've been kinda shell shocked the last few days.

So, I do a lot of small jobs around town, and like a week ago the mayor asked me if I could find his "shorts" (I accepted bc he offered hella money, but genuinely wtf. I can't imagine willingly talking about my underwear with anyone, let alone both [admitting I'd lost it] and [ASKING THEM TO LOOK FOR IT])

Fast forward to 3 days ago, when I'm hanging out w the town's other farmer in her room, and I SEE THEM UNDER HER DRESSER (I know this reads like a stretch, but he described them as purple and covered in stars. that shit's not common)

So anyway I'm currently mid-crisis because:

Do I ask her about it?

Do I TAKE THEM BACK?? (remember the money)

Do I tell him? (I'm heavily leaning towards no, but idk what to do if I end up returning them)

Do I tell her about the job?

Also I have to figure out how to hold them if I take them

I REALLY don't want to talk to this man about anything that could relate to underwear

So yeah any advice would be much appreciated because genuinely I have no idea how tf to go forward

TL;DR: mayor asked me to find his undies (gross) and they're in my friends room. Fml.

[newfarmersdv]

silly cat always in front of the water bowl.

yes it's a guaranteed spot for scritches, but also please let me fill up the water bowl.

[newfarmersdv]

NOBODY TOLD ME BLUEBERRIES GREW THIS FAST

I'm drowning in blueberries. They just keep coming. I only bought 4 plants!!

[newfarmersdv]

Played some JotPK with goth girl and she said I "really know my way around a joystick"

Is this flirting!?!?? Pls send immediate assistance

[newfarmersdv]

the other farmer in town came into possession of a stray cat, and she offered him to me!!!

In other words, I have a cat now and he's the boss of the farm.

[newfarmersdv]

Today a local GROWN ADULT told me he wished his grandma had chickens so he could eat raw eggs every day.

Sharing in case I've deceived anyone into thinking small town living is all sunshine and rainbows.

[newfarmersdv]

Omfg this town is the best thing to ever happen to me. I passed out from exhaustion yesterday (dw I'm drinking lots of water and have been firmly lectured), and the town doctor charged me 11 gold for bringing me to the clinic and fixing me up. ELEVEN. GOLD.

What even is this world and why couldn't I have moved here sooner 😭😭😭

[newfarmersdv]

Okay soooo it maybe happened again and I was charged 646g. BUT still a perk for the first-time infraction to be so low. Shout-out to my man Harvey for taking pity on me. (Before quickly realizing that I just have bad habits. Oops.)

[newfarmersdv]

Sorry I didn't answer your texts, I was busy showering affection on my beautiful baby chicks

(they've started exploring the farm, and I love watching them discover all the trees and rocks 😊)

[newfarmersdv]

Just saw a girl writing on the beach with a typewriter.

I aspire to be that confident some day.

[newfarmersdv]

Is it stupid that I didn't realize I needed a scarecrow until a crow ate my plant? Yes.

But, is it mean that nobody told me that I needed a scarecrow? Also yes.

[newfarmersdv]

THIS TOWN HAS A SPA

abort all plans, it's toasty time. both now and for the foreseeable future.

[newfarmersdv]

all the wildlife here run away from me :(((

I know there's gotta be something I'm doing wrong here bc goth boy has been sighted holding a frog multiple times. (And no we don't get to talk about what that does to my heart. Do not derail.)

[newfarmersdv]

Omfg this town is the best thing to ever happen to me. I passed out from exhaustion yesterday (dw I'm drinking lots of water and have been firmly lectured), and the town doctor charged me 11 gold for bringing me to the clinic and fixing me up. ELEVEN. GOLD.

What even is this world and why couldn't I have moved here sooner 😭😭😭

[newfarmersdv]

New town has Goth Boy and Goth Girl, and it's kinda frying all my insides. Why are people so hot. Why are the hot people friends. How do I be friends with the hot people. Like preferably with benefits but I'd also be so stoked to just be in their presence. Ahdkdhdljfksjjfks

(also golden retriever boy but that's a whole other can of worms/attraction)

[newfarmersdv]

I just walked under a tree and a whole clean shirt fell on my head.

I'm being dead serious. Like, perfectly nice shirt out of freaking nowhere.

Who does it belong to?? Is there even any way to lost-and-found this?? Was it extra or did someone just leave their whole shirt in a tree??