j*ncy is more ted/karen than stancy will ever be. you know why? because as natalia said, nancy is the caretaker of the relationship, she held jon when will was possessed and was there for him at the hospital, and what does she say jon did after? that he ‘disappeared’. after all the investigation and sherlock holmes-ing together in S1, he dipped, because his priority was always elsewhere.
he doesn't understand what nancy needs, like at all. which is ironic bc they implied and kept trying to tell us that I'm S2 steve didn't understand her, and jon did because he helped her avenge barb or something (did that erase her guilt? which she still has to this day??)
he knew that nancy needed comfort in S1 after her encounter in the UD, and stayed there for her, but in S5? her parents were on death's door, and refused to spend 5 mins to check on her.
he said he loved that nancy never does anything half way, but contradicts himself in S3 when he called nancy's scoop a stupid story, because it didn't serve HIM, or give him any advantage. he only likes her ideas and opinions when it concerns him or his family.
he mocks their parents marrying young and living a boring, miserable life, and guess where jncy are now. they're the epitome of self fulfilling prophecy, jon kept affirming that they'll end up miserable and resentful.
they're both the avoidant x avoidant duo, which was literally part of their appeal, they didn't need to put effort into communicating and had it "easy" in the beginning, it's quite symbolic that their first kiss happened right after a random grown ass man spells out their feelings FOR them, doing the work for them, and they DENY their feelings before they just jump to making out. no communication.
I find it hilarious when I see stuff like "they have their own love language they don't have to say I love you to eachother" yeah because they're both avoidant and only enable their similar behaviour in the relationship, they become avoidant TOGETHER, it's why their communication problem has dragged on for this fucking long.
steve was the emotional caretaker in stancy's relationship, he was expressive with his affection, they were together for 10 months by the start of S2 and he was still openly in love with her, which nancy CLEARLY enjoyed, and he pushed her to actually get out of her shell and tell him how she really felt, which unfortunately led to their painful break up, but he was brave enough to pull the plug, and not drag things out, because there are only two options, communicate or break up.
nancy was so descriptive in S4 as to why she loved jon, and what was jon's? "oh she's so ambitious, she works" well it makes sense that jon only sees that side of her, considering that they got together because of their monster hunting expeditions, and how nancy getting shit done has helped in jons favour (will)
it shows that nancy CAN be expressive, but the environment she's in just doesn't bring out that habit in her.
steve sees the REAL her. not JUST the badass gun wielder ace reporter. he said it himself, that she cares about other people, that she was NOT the priss everyone thought she was, that she has a heart of gold, those are her CORE qualities (I love the genius who brought up that the bopper theory also applies to nancy as a person, hard on the outside, soft secretly)
even her ambition as a reporter was her wanting to give people a platform to get the REAL story, like she did with mrs driscoll, and wayne munson, it was driven by empathy.
nancy needs hope, not pessimism, she's already a skeptical person, steve is hope. steve having big dreams and embracing his role as the babysitter because of his supposedly emotionally suppressed upbringing is the optimism that balances out their dynamic, she's so lighthearted and smiley around him, and it's completely genuine, it always was. the scene of her lightening up after seeing steve get out from the car was deliberate, as he's been representing hope the entire season ("I still have hope") as a contrast to jon's "the cycle never ends!"
she may not "want" comfort (which is inherently untrue to begin with, in S1 she told jon she didn't want to be alone, she thinks she SHOULDN'T want comfort because of her guilt) or flowers, but that's because she's conditioned herself into believing her needs don't matter, that work always comes first. steve can show her that it's okay to want to prioritise yourself.
people think steve is ted simply because his parents have a cushy job like him, and their similar upbringing financially, their similarity ends there, it's so surface level.
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