☽ From here ☾ @wild-pineapple-butt
☾ The ashen face grimaces at the suggestion. It seems weird by now. Picturing a life without Renji in it... or perhaps it’s amply awfully possible. It’d mean returning to that crippling hating solitude. To the sands of the Hueco Mundo. Perhaps it’d not be... so sad, since it’d be in a world where Renji and him would have never met so he’d not even fathom what he’d have been missing.
Nnoitra gives it a thought ; he’s surely the best at overthinking things, at rehashing. Dwelling on murky thoughts bringing him down... so he has to do everything he can and puts on the worst attitude to appear threatening and not vulnerable at all...
He’s the Despair after all. Trapped in a cycle.
But, even in the depths of despair, there still might be something a little bit lighter, shining a way through. Renji is Nnoitra’s flame. The torch lighting his path. and he’s clinging to it for dear life, holding onto it as strongly as he possibly can.
“Would have find ya anyway. It’d have taken much more time to trust ya but... I’d have found ya.”
He can’t shake this feeling off ; he feels it deeply down in his bones, in his flesh and soul. They’re bonded. Or maybe in the end the Quinta Espada appears to be a hopeless romantic ? Problematic ones often are, they say...
- Ya don’t believe in fate n things like dat ?... Jiruga suddenly asks, his electric elongated eye riveted to Renji’s face, scrutinizing, anticipating reactions. Fer me... it had to be ya. It couldn’t be anyone else. If it should have been... but he stops right there, shaking his head dismissively ; no, for him, no doubt possible. Many could have get me outta dat fuckin’ tube before ya. Many saw me inside it n dey were just so fuckin’ scared. Like... I was da one prisoner of dat thing... but dey were da ones scared... Who knows... Maybe... we met. Before we died. In... another time n place. Ya know... dis stuff... I used to think it was bullshit but now... I dunno... Sumtimes... I’m like “maybe”, he shrugs with a brief playful glance thrown at the redhead, whose hand is tightly held by his.
Every fiber of his body that was screaming “FUCK YA GONNA KILL YA”, irritated by the looks on people’s faces as they pass by, has now calmed down. Actually, Nnoitra can’t help it but get... quite... cocky ? Let’s face it, his inner voice probably murmurs, we are more powerful than anyone around right now and we get ourselves the coolest shinigami.
- I fuckin’ hope so ya gonna do it ! Nnoitra exclaims, with a big bright for once grin. heh dere’s gotta be a benefit fer datin’ ya !” he teases him playfully. ☽
