There is nowhere to go but through the smoke

"Did we take too many chances Did we let too many pass us Did we throw it all away Did we throw it all away Did we light too many matches Turn ourselves into these ashes Did we throw it all away Did we throw it all away We walk through the fire Is there a way out?"

[noah-allen-vm]

Aiden isn’t terribly offended by the harsh words the other spews at him. He’s used to pissing people off, though he can’t help but to note that Noah seemed particularly on edge today. ❝Yeah—it’s the middle of the day, you’re also awake. Who pissed in your cheerios? ❞ He scoffs, but makes no moves to leave. Even with the man’s clearly soured mood.

❝As for what annoying things I feel like talking about today…Hm, let me think. As I’m sure you’re aware, I have a running list.❞ He’ll raise his eyebrows, a grin evident on his features. However, eventually, he relents. Not genuinely wanting to upset the man, especially when he seems more tense than generally irritated. ❝I came to check on you asshat, annoying you is simply a bonus for our conversations.❞

He realizes that harsh words weren’t going to scare the other away. He gave in and turned, leaning on the banister, glancing to the floor a story below before settling in. He looks the other over, “I have insomnia, what’s your excuse?” 

“Aiden...” He starts to say something, starts to lay it all out. A girl, Noah had let her in and let her get close, and she had left him in the dust. A girl he had known for some time, was now refusing to ever speak to him again. She had left and he was struggling with it, but he can’t let anyone else in. Not so soon. It had taken years for him to even consider letting her in and she had hurt him so badly. No one knew how close they had gotten, or that she had left him, “Thanks for checking. I’m fine.” He tries to shoo him away with hand motions.

[noah-allen-vm]

do the death dealers scare you? do you have a favorite?

“Who isn’t a little scared of the death dealers. I’m smart enough to know they could kick my ass. I think my favorite would be Zaiden, purely because his loyalty to the coven. We don’t really get along, I aggravate him, but I get his reasons and I respect him for them.” He rolls his eyes, trying not to say something worse than that about the death dealer that obviously hates him.

@bitcmrks

[noah-allen-vm]

[noah-allen-vm]

More Facts About Noah Allen

Basics

Name (& pronunciation): Noah Allen (No-wuh   ăl-eh-n) Date of Birth (& age):He thinks October 20, 1493  526 (he thinks, trauma makes it hard to remember) Place of Birth: Scotland  Gender: Cis-Male Species:Vampire Social Class/Community Status: Middle class Language: Gaelic and English Family: Sister; Wanted connection; When he became ill with the Black Death he begged to be turned. His sire refused until Noah was at his very last moments. His sire left him to go through the change alone. Noah’s sister took the best care of him she could and when daylight broke, the transformation was complete. The blood lust came first. In his feral state, Noah believed he killed his sister. Until this wanted connection is filled, she will be presumed dead but if she survived and he turned her, she would be bitter and cruel to him but extremely sweet otherwise, making him seem petty and cruel for telling “lies” about her cruelty to him.

Sire; Wanted connection; His sire was reluctant to turn him and even though he wasn’t absent, he forced Noah to learn everything on his own while he just watched. Noah had to learn how to be a vampire through mistake after mistake. the troubleshooting came at a cost to Noah’s mental health. His sire would love to see him and Noah would easily fall into being the good fledgling but Noah would harbor harsh feelings for him. Physical Description Height: 6 foot 1 inch Weight: 180 Hair: Dirty blond  Eyes: Mostly Green-Hazel  Detailed Physical Description:  Noah may or may not have been the inspiration for the famous David statue, he won’t ever admit it. His hair is perfectly curled and his jaw is sharp and sculpted. His eyes aren’t exactly symmetrical but it’s hardly noticeable among his other pleasant physical qualities. He is fit, he used to run errands that were physically demanding to earn money to care for his sister and it continued into his vampire life. Typical Clothing/Equipment: He always has a camera but now he wears a field jacket but he doesn’t remember from what era. Under that is normally a T shirt or turtle neck and jeans with converse.  Personality/Attributes Personality/Attitude: He is actually really nice but he panics easy. He tries to push people away and often induces his own panic attacks when people get close to or even are kind to him. He fears he will harm them just by being near them, or they will be like his sire.  Skills/Talents: He is a photographer  Favourites/Likes: Photography, Nature, Being with someone and them just quietly being together, even doing nothing or doing their own thing in silence. Most Hated/Dislikes: Drawing and painting with oil and chalk or charcoal. Goals/Ambitions: It had been just to survive and hurt as few people as he could. Now he is trying to get over his fears and make a home for himself. Strengths: He can be insightful and very observant Weaknesses: Very short tempered and it can get him into some binds that he can’t get out of. Fears: Getting close to someone only to harm or kill them and having to live for eternity with that. Hobbies/Interests: Photography  Regular Routine: Most of the day he sleeps or hides in his room and refuses to come into the common area with the others in the coven. During the night he either goes for a walk in the most secluded places he can find, such as abandoned buildings, but he also will work at night to try to give something back to the coven, but he struggles to keep jobs with his panic attacks and his attitude. Philosophy of Life: “You have to carry them with you.” He is an abomination and should not exist, so when harm comes from him, even accidental, he considers it his fault and he HAS TO carry that with him for eternity. Attitude Toward Death: He is terrified of being the one to bring about other’s death and he fears his will never come. Guilt is the main driving force behind this. Religion/Beliefs: He was once Presbyterian but now he is questioning. His father was Catholic even though most of the country was doing away with Papal rule. Fetishes/Strange Behaviors: He likes to be drawn, even though he hates art. His sire gave him strange likes and dislikes.  Most Instructive/Painful/Memorable Experience: He begged to be turned and his sire told him no. He begged until the sire finally gave in, but to teach him a lesson his sire allowed him to murder his sister. When the sire found him the sire said, “Now you must carry her with you and anyone you harm from this day on.” Sexual Preference/Experience: He is bi-curious and he had an almost relationship with his sire when he was still human. Other than that he has only ever dated women, which was also as a human. He has only ever had one night stands since being turned. Education/Special Training: He has worked a lot of random jobs with random training. He never stays put so he is taught new skills at every odd job he works. His education is whatever he has been able to just pick up informally on his own. Place/Type of Residence: He lives at the mansion with the coven. Occupation: Odd jobs Place of Work: It changes often Additional Notes:   Noah has let two women into his life in the past few weeks and both have disappointed him and hurt him greatly. They didn’t mean to but his mental state was not in a place to take their actions well so he is spiraling in his mental panic and is verge of meltdown.

[noah-allen-vm]

OPEN                     Blaise was just glad that he had taken an extra second to glance at the weather report that morning, and had grabbed his umbrella before leaving his apartment that morning. He had stayed late after his classes, and by the time he had left the moon was already high in the sky. And the rain was already coming down in sheets, easily soaking everything in its path. Umbrella or no umbrella, normally he would have taken the subway to get as close as he could to his apartment before braving the weather by walking. But the train he had been on had broken down or changed service or something he hadn’t really paid attention to before getting off and deciding to just walk the extra few blocks home.                  

     The little person on the pedestrian signal across the street blinked as Blaise approached the intersection, changing to the stop hand just as his foot left the curb. Cursing as his foot sank into a deeper than he was expecting puddle, Blaise jumped back his umbrella spinning slightly spraying the nearby vicinity with droplets. Which was just when he noticed the presence behind him. 

“I’m sorry!” He turned apologetically to the person behind him. “I would ask if I got you wet but I feel like the rain has already taken care of that. Are you okay? I didn’t hit you with my umbrella or anything did I?”

Noah had been standing there for a while, leaning on the post, just scrolling through his phone. He had been walking and doing as such but he had realized that he was too distracted to keep that up for very long. He had just been in a very short almost relationship so being around people was getting easier, but she was gone now. He wouldn’t ever pursue her again even if he did see her. He wouldn’t let anyone get into his life like that again. He didn’t think he was done dating forever, he just thought he was done with the specific sort of relationship they had.

While he was distracted, he stopped and moved off to the side where he would be out of everyone’s way. He scrolled through the article he was reading, sinking closer against the pole as someone with an umbrella came up next to him.

He knew the other was about to back up, he heard the beep saying the light had turned red. Instead of staying where he was, he stepped out and instead of the rain drizzling on his phone from above, the umbrella doused him and his phone. The screen probably wouldn’t work properly now. He wiped it on his jeans and put it away as the other apologized.

“I can dry off and youre right, I was already getting pretty soaked as it was. Just a surprise. That’s all. No harm.” He could tell the other was supernatural but wasn’t exactly sure how to say anything about it or if he should.

[noah-allen-vm]

@bloodproven

Starter for Noah and Aiden

Noah had started to isolate himself again. Noah wasn’t exactly sane, to be honest. He was starting to feel a sort of panic, a mania, set in. He didn’t know exactly what had caused it, he just knew that he didn’t want to be near anyone. The last person he had gotten close to, he shouldn’t have. He had even kissed her and now he was alone again.

That is why when he saw Aiden coming he stopped in his tracked and snarled loudly, “Do you ever go to sleep? It’s the middle of the day.” He continued to walk, wishing that it was not in the middle of the day. Maybe he could layer up and go outside and find a hiding spot, “What annoying thing do you want to talk about today?

[noah-allen-vm]

With Noah’s sudden mvement, she turned to look at him, her body scoting so it was more horizontal, her head resting against the pillow. She was surprised to see him pull out another photo album, and her interest was definitely piqued. After he wa done grabbing the book and situated, Ophelia let go of Noah’s hand, resting both of hers on her stomach as she listened to him. She had no idea what he could possibly mean until he opened the album, and suddenly it was put into perspective for her. Without even meaning to, her lips pulled into the faintest of smiles, a fluttering sensation moving through her chest, as if she were nervous. “You have an entire album full of me,” she muttered, her fingers toying with the hem of her shirt. Ophelia felt an overwheming urge to plant a kiss on his lips, but she stayed where she was, her eyes focused on his face. “And here I thought you hated me.”

As he flipped through the pictures, he took in what she was saying, the expression on her face. He could see her out of the corner of his eye. He turned and laid next to her on his side, still holding the album where she could see, even awkwardly. All of the pictures had her slightly out of frame but never at any angles that could be considered rude, “Your dress matched these flowers. You were looking down and I... didn’t say anything.” He shrugged but paused everything, sitting the album down to look at her, “You don’t think it was creepy?” He had been so worried she would freak out and leave, seeing that he just snapped pictures of her and in such a way that she never saw him do it, “I was scared. Petrified. I didn’t know what to expect of any of this. I just wanted to chase you away so I wouldn’t have to worry, but I worried anyway. You seemed to be alone a lot.” Maybe he could get her to talk about her past a little.

[noah-allen-vm]

The only person Salem ever really opened up to was Lysander. The two had known each other long enough that Salem felt he could trust him, and even then he would deflect the topic of conversation from himself. He’d been around for a long time, and he felt that it was a hassle to try and explain his roots to new people. In a way he understood how Noah felt, but that didn’t mean he wanted to be lonely. “People do things they don’t mean in hard times,” he stated simply, pressing a figer to his lips as he contemplated. “As for running into Damien, he’s mostly harmless, from what I can tell. Quite large and brooding, but I’ve never seen anything that flagged him as bad. Unless you mess with his daughter. That might get you killed.”

He finally sat back and crossed an ankle over one of his knees, “Are you sure you’re okay with me being in here?” He asked quietly. He didn’t want to intrude. Salem was nice and at this point he knew him well enough to know he was a decent person, or was really good at pretending such. If anything happened to Salem because of him now, he would feel guilty for a few centuries, “He doesn’t seem that bad or scary... Except... I’m kind of his daughter’s best friend... and I kind of freaked out on her like I did to you in the hallway. Only more personally because we’ve hung out for two hundred years.”

[noah-allen-vm]

He kept his gaze steady on Noah’s face, a concerned expression on his own features. Salem had never been the type to judge people; no matter how rude or polite, he treated everyone with the same amount of respect. It had almost landed him in hot water a few times, but he let those instances roll off his shoulders without a second thought. However, what Noah was saying concerned him, and he couldn’t help but lean forward, his fingertips pressing together and his elbows resting against his knees. “You haven’t been rude to me yet. And even if you are rude, I doubt I’ll never want to speak to you again. Unless that’s something you want to happen, of course. I like to give people the option of interacting with me; I’ve heard I can be quite tiresome.” Salem cleared his throat, shifting once again in his chair. “Have you told them to leave you be?”

He watched the other, reaching for the drink without taking his eyes off of Salem. His hands weren’t shaking anymore. The panic attack had passed, “Most of the time it is what I want.” He admitted. Saying out loud what his thought process was on friendship made him sound crazy even to himself. When he told the story he said that he was turned and that his sire guilt tripped him into thinking he was going to cause pain. It was much more than that, but he couldn’t even admit it to himself, “I was rude.” He finally smiled a little, “I ran into you and started yelling at you like you had done something.” He paused a moment and thought about Ophelia. He really liked her but she had aggravated him at times. She attached and wouldn’t let go and now he was afraid he would have the same with Salem, “It’s not something they do on purpose. I have run smack dab into six or seven people the past two months.One was Damien.” He cringed.

[noah-allen-vm]

She stayed quiet for as long as she could, keeping her gaze on the page. Noah’s sire was obviously a sore subject for him, and she regretted ever making the remark in the first place. But on the other hand, he had brought up the topic to begin with, and had even opened himself up when he offered up the photo album. Then again, Ophelia knew how easily his mood flipped, nd she was trying to keep him in one headspace for as long as she possibly could.When he took hold of her hand, she shifted it just enough so she could twine their fingers, but still loked at the photo, nodding as he spoke. “I’m jealous that I wasn’t around when these were taken.”

He chewed on his cheek as he stared at the picture. He contemplated for a long time but finally made a choice. He leaned over and pulled open another drawer. It was hard to dig in it with only one hand but he gripped her hand a little tighter as if to steady himself on the bed. He pulled out another album, “Don’t take this the way it is going to sound but you were around for most of these.” He held it up before opening it up and laying it atop the other. All of them were tilted and taken at strange angles. One picture had her in the side of it, flowers at her ankles and her fingers twisted in her hair as if he was walking behind her with his head down, “I think this was the first time you tried to hang out with me. I wasn’t talking but you didn’t stop talking and I guess I wanted to remember that.” A second one was on a bus like the camera was on the floor across from them showing them from the waist down, his feet on the ground, one blurred with the motion of tapping, her feet crossed under her in the chair, “I dropped the camera but it had a timer. I think this was the first time you convinced me to leave the mansion.”

[noah-allen-vm]

Scar rolled his eyes as he walked into the room. Pitiful would be the best way to describe it. The only reason he was here because he had some respect for the coven. Scar was loyal in that sense and the vampires were honorable people. At least better then lycans.  He saw Noah in the distance and smirked. He could have fun with that one.

Scar snorted in response. “Am I bad person for embracing my most vampiric of instincts?” Scar asked raising an eyebrow. The vampire tsked at the other. “You need to be more resilent than that.” He leaned in with a smirk. “I’m barely a threat.” Scar was anything but barely a threat but how much does the other about him. Scar brushed his hair back.

“Come with me…”

Noah hadn’t seen this vampire before. He may not know the other coven members very well but he had at least seen all of them, he had thought. Maybe this was a new one? A recluse like him? He didn’t know, and he really didn’t want to figure it out. He didn’t want yet another person chewing him out for not letting people in. He was sick and tired of that fight every time he breathed in someone’s direction.

“Hold on. I’m not going anywhere with you.” He said, running a hand through his curls, as if Scar reminded him that he sometimes needed to do that, “Who are you?” He asked with apprehension.

[noah-allen-vm]

Ophelia didn’t mind the similarities that she found between herself and Noah’s sire. If anything, she figured that’s why he was so comfortable with her in the first place, and the thought almost made her smile. But with his outburst, she winced away from him a little, eyes on his face as the atmosphere of the room suddenly went serious. Trueborn. A term she’d always hated for several reasons. Ophelia had been so lonely growing up, sometimes the only child that could be found around the manor; she entertained herself however she could, but mostly she’d chase Damien around until he would pick her up, glad for the small moment of affection he would allow her before she was handed off to someone else. Biting her lip at the thought, Lia shrunk away from Noah but kept the album in her lp, flipping the page over and pointing to the first photo she saw. “Tell me about this one.”

He softened at the look, “I... I mean... I’m sorry, he was mean to me the last few years. I’m so sorry.” He shifted to sit next to her again as she went to the album again. She didn’t want to dwell on it. Being like his sire probably made her feel closer to him and he just shattered that and ripped it away from her. He didn’t even know why it mattered. So what if she had some similarities. It wasn’t like that changed what he liked about her, didn’t change anything. He realized that she didn’t know his sire so it wasn’t a bad thing to her to be like his sire. He cleared his throat and gently took hold of her hand, “It was probably... midnight but I found a cafe that had great lighting.” 

[noah-allen-vm]

It wasn’t hard to busy himself straight away, getting a plain black mug ready and stuffing a tea bag into it. He was glad he’d already prepped the hot water, slowly pouring itinto the cup and watching a bit of foam swirl around in the water as the tea began to steep. “It’s nice to meet you, Noah,” he responded softly, turning to the other and setting the mug beside him on one of the many tables he kept around. Salem’s room was decorated intricately, with tapestries covering each wall, posters he’d acquired in the seventies of his favorite bands, and hooks and trays that held countless pieces of jewelry. It looked like something straight out of a movie, and that’s how he liked it. “I don’t believe we’ve met before,” he grunted, lowering himself into his favorite upholstered chair. “I’m Salem. And odn’t feel like you need to apologize. Sometimes hings can get overwhelming.” Salem’s body sank against te chair, his brows furrowing as he thought. “I’ve been with them for over a century. I know that much.”

He started to chew on his nails, trying to find something to ground himself. A water bottle, candy wrapper. He settled for just rubbing the blanket between his fingers and just trying to focus on the feeling of the stitches, “Thank you for the tea.We haven’t, met, now that I think back. I’m... kind of rude so after the first meeting many people just don’t want to speak again. If we had met before, you wouldn’t have let me in here and by the end of this you won’t let me in again.” He shrugged, fully prepared for the speech about pushing people away and letting people in and ending up alone. He had fought so many others recently that he felt everything was imploding. He was surprised this argument hadn’t gotten him into a physical argument just yet, “This is the longest I have ever settled in one place, otherwise I would lose count too. Two hundred years in the coven. Barely a soul even knows I exist. Well, until this new rule that everyone needs buddies to go out. Now everyone stays at the mansion and I’m never alone.”

[noah-allen-vm]

Theo sighed, lifting her hands to rub at her temples. All she wanted to do was leave, go back to her apartment, and finish her book of the day. It as growing exhausting having to sit there, knowing he didn’t want to interact with her any longer. “I need to leave, Noah. I need to go back to my apartment and forget that I exist for a little bit. Do you think you can let me do that, please?” The brunette was rolling her eyes now, only managing a short glance. “Probably because you’re being bull-headed and idiotic. If youlet people in, they wouldn’t get heated over it.”

“I was letting you stay here and I was going to go but if you don’t want that then go to your apartment. Whatever.” He stood up, intending to leave either way. He had come here in search of peace and had found this. She was acting understanding then fighting everything he said, “I am protecting myself as much as I’m protecting those around me. I hurt someone, I have to live with it, even if it is an accident. Now this fight, I have to carry. So do you. But I also don’t have to be anyone’s friends, because no one has truly been a friend to me without stabbing me in the back. I either hurt or get hurt and I’ve avoided it for years. Real people are rare.”

[noah-allen-vm]

@scaredkanai

Closed starter for Scar and Noah

Noah was trying his best to avoid everyone. It hadn’t been working lately. everyone could tell he was on edge, that his claustrophobia was setting in. He hadn’t been around so many people in so long, but he seemed unable to get away. He used to blend. He used to be bland. He used to just fade into nothing and just watch from the corner. Part of him hoped this was an existential crisis. A midlife crisis of some sort. Maybe this was the turning point in his life to force him to get better. Or maybe he was just finally going insane. 500 years might do that to a vampire, he didn’t know. Now with the summit drawing closer, he had more to worry about. 

He came down the hall, headed outside, only to realize the sun was just about to come up. He thought he was the only one still awake, so when he cussed aloud, he didn’t realize the other vampire was in the room. The sound of movement made him spin on the other with wide eyes, “What the fuck!? You scared the shit out of me! What are you doing, hiding in the shadows like that!?” 

[noah-allen-vm]

As he spoke about the pictures on the first page, she kept silent. Ophelia would never admit out loud just how soothing his voice was to her, and she found that she didn’t need to look at him as he explained what the pictures were. For a moment, her fingers lingered on the one of his sister, taking in just how much the siblings had looked alike. Noah had never told her what happened to his sister, and she was scared to ask him, not wanting to set off any unwanted feelings within him. When her eyes flicked to the one of the sunset, Lia bit her lip, her gaze finally finding Noah’s so she could muster the smallest of smiles. “I’ve never gotten to see the sun. Only through blinds and curtains and all of that.” She sighed, taking in the facts about his sire, fingers touching the same photo as they had been before. “He and I have a lot in common.”

He smiled lightly as he watched her touch the pictures. He missed his sister greatly but he was glad when they moved on to the picture of the sun instead, “No!” He sat up at her words, practically spitting his own as he turned to face her. Rage overtook his features, “No, you are nothing like my sire. The only think you have in common is that you are both trueborn.” He grabbed her arms, “You are kind, and funny, jovial and beautiful and pushy. Nothing like him. He was cruel and was cold. He faked his affections.” He rubbed her arms with his thumbs, though he didn’t want to remember she was an artist at some point too. She was a trueborn that had never seen the sun. She broke down his walls and made him smile. She did have a lot in common with him, but he hated the thought. 

[noah-allen-vm]

Theo sighed, turning her face away from Noah just before shaking her head. “Vernacular or not, it felt condescending in the moment. That’d be like me calling you ‘sweetheart’ for no particular reason.” Lolling her head to peer at him once more, she adjusted her stance, already ready to move along. “I really need to go.” Her arms crossed over her body, a move she had perfected growing up when she wanted to close herself off to people. “I know you’re sayng you don’t want anyone in your life, but if you change your mind…look for Lysander King. He’s my…it’s hard to put it int words. But he can help you find me, should you need me.”

“I meant.... I say love to everyone. I don’t mean it that way. I can’t force you to take it the way I mean it, I can only mean it. It’s literally habit. I wasn’t being condiscending. I guess I’m saying sorry I didn’t mean it the way you took it. 500 years of saying it, I don’t know if I can stop.” He shook his head, “You don’t have to. You came here expecting to be able to sit here. It’s somewhere you’re used to being. I can leave instead.” He paused though, “Why is everyone treating me like this recently? I had this same argument with two other people this week.”