This post is inspired by @ceoofdoomedyuri who has been doing an excellent post series where they break down song lyrics they feel fit LG/CXS/Shiguang dynamics (consider reading some of their posts). Since I also love music and Link Click, I figured why not (and hopefully they don’t mind me jumping in on this and yapping alongside them — I told you, music and Shiguang are my weaknesses 😅🤣)
I have not chosen a song off their list and in solidarity, have decided to go with one y’all might side eye me for initially — something a little less overt than the ones I usually think of for them.
Song: Ghost - Coheed and Cambria
I fuss and fight my curiosity
With welcome arms and frightened fingers, twitched anxiety
How am I to know?
How am I to know?
As a boy, I watched the world through broken eyes
Given to me by a man, his wife, and all they had disguised
Uncertainty now keeps me asking how I’ll lead the most
As they became, or will I teach the examples of their ghost?
Free me
From this body
I just wanna, wanna be on the outside
Looking in (on you...)
Free me
From this body
I just wanna, wanna be on the outside
Looking in
Free me
Free me
I really love this band (probably my favorite English speaking one at this point), but most of their albums are concept albums based in their own story/world and I wouldn’t say fit Shiguang easily. This is one that I think can fit them (though you may have to bear with me and the lyrics aren’t perfect for it)
This song is originally about the singer's anxiety surrounding becoming a parent, the worry that he will mess up. Clearly that has nothing to do to with Shiguang, but I do feel some of the lyrics can relate to them if looked at in a different way.
I think that this fandom can universally agree that whether you see LG and CXS’s relationship as romantic, platonic, or queer-platonic, there is a deep love/bond between these two, and I think this song fits with any relationship dynamic interpretation.
I see this song specifically coming from LG’s perspective (big surprise, I know)
I fuss and fight my curiosity
With welcome arms and frightened fingers, twitched anxiety
How am I to know?
How am I to know?
Again, this song is about someone becoming a new parent, about the birth of a child, but in this instance, these lyrics could be read relating to LG’s experience with jumping back in time. In a way, each repeat cycle is like a ‘rebirth’ of CXS (especially when he starts from the beginning). LG is fighting that need to fix past mistakes, to keep CXS alive, wondering what could be and how he can get to a future he wants. The whole situation has to be anxiety provoking, both in the sense of remeeting CXS, all the unknowns, and the question of how he does this and succeeds.
I also think the line about welcome arms and frightened fingers could represent an internal desire from LG. He has such a familiarity with CXS, but when he goes back to the beginning and CXS doesn’t even know his name, LG has to hold back. That must be so hard for him. I could see him having this impulse to move, to be closer, to resume the relationship he had and yearns for again, but because there is no history for CXS at that point, LG has to restrain himself -- has to fight that twitched anxiety and hurt that goes with it.
As a boy, I watched the world through broken eyes
Given to me by a man, his wife, and all they had disguised
Uncertainty now keeps me asking how I’ll lead the most
As they became, or will I teach the examples of their ghost?
Second verse is harder to make an argument for and takes some theory/assumptions. Again, in the original context of the song, this is noting mistakes the singer's parents made and his fear of repeating those same things with his child. From a LG POV, the first lines make me think about what we’ve seen with the S3 PV. There’s a lot of theorizing that LG didn’t have the best home life, that abuse may be at play, and then we see him with CXS, he may be the first person who’s ever shown LG caring and concern. That would be an explanation for why LG has bonded so strongly to him (despite him seeming more reserved with others).
So that’s the context I see here, a reference to the past, to the importance CXS has played in his life, taking him from someone broken to someone not so broken (at least until CXS died and this whole nightmare started). The second half doesn’t fit when taken literally, but in a broader sense, could be looked at as a sentiment related to LG’s internal struggle with uncertainty in this time looping. How can he make this time different? Will he repeat the past mistakes that lead to CXS dying again, will he fail again and let CXS down because of that (maybe drawings parallel to his parents failing him as a support piece, if we want to bring the parental theme back into it). Additionally, this could be looking at the ghost of LG's prior actions and that lead to the same mistakes/final outcome with CXS’s death and not wanting to repeat it.
Free me
From this body
I just wanna, wanna be on the outside
Looking in (on you...)
Free me
From this body
I just wanna, wanna be on the outside
Looking in
I think in the original context, this goes back to that fear of fucking up your kid, that it’s easier to watch as an observer rather being in it where the consequences/stakes are so much higher. Relating this to LG’s POV, I can see it as having two meanings. With relation to the “freeing me from this body,” this hits me with him jumping. He needs to free himself from the body/reality where CXS no longer exists. He can’t live with that, and can’t stand to live that existence, would rather be outside of it, only to look back on it (looking back on fond memories, and then looking back on those he regrets to try to change things).
Another way I would interpret this goes along with the theory/prediction that when LG says that the current jump is his last chance, this is referring to him stopping the looping, and in particular, that the next time if he fails, he will go back and never meeting CXS or trade his life for CXS’s. Though LG wants to succeed and be with CXS (as evidence of what he’s currently doing), I think he’d do anything to keep him alive, whether that be giving him up by never meeting him because LG assumes his presence in CXS’s life is the initial trigger that sets his death node (being on the outside looking in ) or in LG's own death, sacrificing/trading his life to save CXS (freeing him from this body)
So overall, looking at this from LG’s position, this song could be about regrets of the past, fear of what to come/how he could fuck it up, and a yearning to succeed or in a way, be removed from the situation if it meant succeeding in saving CXS.
Hopefully that makes sense and y’all can see where I’m coming from with this, even though the song's intended meaning is a bit different from how I feel it could fit to them (also, now I really relate to those comments you’ve made to justify your stance 🤣). Also, give the song a listen if you haven't heard it (it's so pretty)