CODEPENDENCY vs AUTHENTIC INTIMACY
Codependency: I need you to feel OK or else I'm not ok.
- Authentic Intimacy: I allow you to experience whatever you are experiencing, without needing to change or fix it. You are your own person.
Codependency: I need you to support me and I will guilt you in subtle and not so subtle ways if you don't.
- Authentic Intimacy: I ask for support when I need it from others, not just my partner, and I don't lash out if it's not available in the way I need it.
Codependency: I will blame and shame you for not doing what I want you to do.
- Authentic Intimacy: I accept you as you are while having clear standards around how I will be treated and spoken to.
Codependency: You should know what I need. It's not the same if I have to explain it to you.
- Authentic Intimacy: I communicate openly, and I will never blame you for my lack of courage to share what I want and need.
Codependency: True love is about being loyal no matter what.
- Authentic Intimacy: I have standards and boundaries about how I will be spoken to and treated, and I will clearly express those to you with love.
Codependency: You have a lot of issues, and I'm going to help you. That's where I get my value and worth and sense of being needed.
- Authentic Intimacy: I'm already valuable and worthy. I'm not here to be my partner's therapist, fixer or caretaker.
Codependency: I need you, and you need me.
- Authentic Intimacy: I choose to be with you every day, and you choose to be with me.
Codependency: I can't be without you.
- Authentic Intimacy: I love my alone time. And I love being with you’.
✍️ Serdar Hararovich
Artist: Katerina Orissa
