Golly @notches-inyourspine - Tumblr Blog

If I could, I would.

Even if it turned the sky green

Even if high water or hell came to me

If I could reach beyond the sky and pluck you back to reality,

I would… if I could.

Id live in constant rain

Winds taking bits of my home,

Constantly taking on your pain.

I would give it all and more and more

Destroy the world and create it over

I would move mountains and rivers

Reposition the water and shore

Id end it all and more.

If I could, I would.

please don't stop

I didn’t.

Nothing is as it was.

Even the sweetest sweet does not bring upon the magic it once tasted of.

The bitter does not pack the punch that knocks the wind out of your lungs.

Everything is more dull. More serious. More pressing. More expensive. More impossible.

Upon waking to the truth, we lose sight of the dream.

I just want to feel it again

I just want to feel it

I just want to feel

Please.

i dont know why I am here. I guess it is kind of like reaching backwards into the void and I somehow pulled this back to my brain. I just remember it being a place to vent and be as dramatic about it as possible but now I see they flag posts with titties so this obviously isnt the place I left.. all these years later and I am still just as miserable. Still revolving my life around just being able to breathe. i dont even remember the last time i attempted to write something. i dont ever remember deciding to stop, honestly. i guess somethings you dont really decide. More like.. there are very very verrrrryy few things that you DO get to decide. I feel left alone in this world. I have guilt that is so loud it deafens. I lost someone recently who was very foundational in my life. Very likely one of the only humans that I was ever able to be completely honest with and would still talk to me the next day. took care of me. took blades out of my hand and drove me to the hospital. someone who very literally saved my life. He had demons that are beyond what i can imagine and he did what he did to feel relief. I dont blame him. I love him beyond measure. I feel like a piece of my soul left this fucking planet the minute he stopped breathing. In the later months after his death, I just read old messages all day long and picked out all the times this man was asking me for help, something i didnt know when i was 15/16 or even 20. I didnt see that he was killing himself infront of me and all i was doing was saying “haha same.” For the rest of my life, I will carry him with me and miss him more than i could ever fathom putting into words and i will never ever ever let another person walk into my life with a broken heart and allow myself to be numb to it. but this isnt about them or the future. this is about the beautiful, giant mess that he was. I just.. there is no world worth living in that you arent a part of. I hope i get to hug you again some day. I have to believe that I will.

thats all the crying i am allowed to do in one day before my roommate starts to think im gonna kill myself.

fuck-i-just

Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”

poselikeateam

Why does this not have any notes?

ice-cream-thursdae

lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”

notronaldreagan-blog

“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”

catbug

“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”

thesteppinrazor

Pro tip: Don’t do this if you recently applied for a new job.

coachcraigcahn

bolded. just in case.

rajning-deactivated20160412

i feel like that pro tip is told from experience

wild-rness

i use humor to cover up the fact that i want to jump off a bridge

90s90s90s

oddfilmstills

the end of the f***ing world s01e01

sexifyyuploads

unbotheredmuse

a lack of communication can really fuck up a lot of good shit

wordsnquotes

There is no shame in being hungry for another person. There is no shame in wanting very much to share your life with somebody.

Augusten Burroughs, This Is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike. (via wordsnquotes)

Ba

(via shrimpcookie)