DEACTIVATED @nothingbutsoulmatesjongkey - Tumblr Blog

we'll miss you. please treat yourself well and be happy in life. take care!

thank you anon!! same to you!!

This tumblr is private now and I’ll also be deleting my aff account for those of you who still read jongkey fics

my aff account is officially deactivated! Thank you all for consistently supporting and loving my works for six years. It truly meant alot and has helped me become who I am and I’ve improved my writing soooo much!

Why I deactivated? I’ve been thinking about this for the past year or so after jjong died and I think....it’s been a long time coming. It’s a part of me I was ready to let go of and I hope you all understand

Will I upload my fics elsewhere? Probably not....some of them might be floating around uploaded by others, but I personally will not upload them.

Will you be active here? Nope. This will be the last you see of me on NBS, AFF...Youtube...okay wow now that makes it REALLY sad. If you want to stay in touch with me you can follow me here @shawolsdubuleader but I’m not even that active there...anyways.

Thank you. I love you.

#personal #admin post #jongkey #jongkey fics

This tumblr is private now and I’ll also be deleting my aff account for those of you who still read jongkey fics

#jongkey #jongkey fanfics

fyjjong

blue night radio - 150408 (on his song, “내일쯤 (around tomorrow)”) jonghyun: seems like the lyrics will be a source of comfort even if you don’t gain strength today. it’s alright to gain strength even tomorrow. i wanted to say that it’s okay, even if you have been worn out and had a hard time (for as long as) a month. i tried writing the song (for that reason). please gain strength tomorrow! it’ll be fine as long as you gain strength when you feel like it. (source: cosmicsticks)

fyjjong

blue night radio - 150408 jonghyun: if you have a cold i hope you will get well soon. please remember to take your meals and medicines. (…) because there seems to be a lot of people who are having a hard time i wanted to play a role on blue night that provides everyone a shelted to get comforted. i’m here all the time so, please, come and be comforted. (source: cosmicsticks)

Thank you for posting that. SHINee used to be such a big part of my life, Jonghyun in particular, but after December I lost touch with the fandom and the group in general. Like the moment I could listen to his music again was emotional and meant so much to me because I used to listen to his music every day, but as the time has passed... I drifted away. It makes me so sad because I know I loved having them as a part of my life, they were my source of happiness. I'm glad I'm not alone.

It truly is going to be hard to accept it, but...you're doing just fine, love. Pace yourself; it could be a month from now or five years from now when you're finally able to watch SHINee like before and that's ok 💕

Reading your post, it really hit me that it had almost been 2 years. It sounds like a lot of time and yet it feels like barely any time has passed. He was such a big part of my life, that I think my mind has trouble accepting he's gone. I know he is, but it's like my mind creates this phantom feeling that he's still here. I don't think it can cope with him being gone. This will be an ongoing journey for all of us. Don't feel bad for how you feel. Shawols will be with you always!

Time is truly merciless and it goes by so fast :( I completely understand what you mean and like I said before, it’s reassuring to know how others are coping and grieving. Thank you, love! I’ll always be with you <3

hey, thanks for posting that! i understand exactly what you mean and how you feel, and I'm glad i'm not the only one. i felt so distant from them, but i'm gradually getting closer! i hope this feeling clears up for you and that you can be happy~ all the best ❤️❤️

*hugs* thank you for sharing your progress with me! i’m sure it was hard for you too, so thank you for the reassurance. <3 wishing you all the best, anon

Hey Brittany 💜 thank you for making that post, really. It may seem that your thoughts are all over the place but they make so much sense. I feel the same way as you, it just... Doesn't feel right anymore. I still keep up with them but it doesn't feel the same. I hope both of us can, eventually, feel good about shinee again. Also, it's good to see you on my dash again, ily 💜💜💜💜💜

thank you for sending this, it helps alot to know you’re not alone :) tysm I truly thought I was crazy to still feel this way, but I’m sure lots of shawols can relate. thank you again and ily too <3

DISCLAIMER: mentions of emotional trauma, ptsd, grief, jonghyun

hey guys...it’s been a while...a long while. idk why I’m psoting this, mahybe i’ll delete it later, but i needed to vent/write out my thoughts. this may not make any sense at the end, but it’s going to help me in the long run.

it’s been nearly two years since we lost jjong and intially, I was kinda okay with the idea of him being gone, gone. but the more i thought about it and realized that hey “someone i’ve loved, admired and cherished” is gone....idk...i kinda drifted from the fandom and SHINee in general.

a year after his death, I kept up with what they were doing, was active here and on my YT, but throughout it all...i felt a disconnect and for the longest i couldn’t understand it. while watching them, old videos and new videos, it always felt like something was missing.

like....they were strangers. even now amidst taemin’s japan comeback and the others in the military...they feel so...distant to me. i talked to my mom about it and she calmly told me it was because of the trauma of losing someone so suddenly like that and immediately distancing myself from them as a coping mechanism.

“i can’t get hurt if i don’t know them.”

it was bad in the beginning, i was hesitant in opening facebook because i dreaded seeing another article like that one pop up. even now whenever i’m on social media and i see an idol’s name trending...i panic and think the worst.

sometimes i think that i’ve accepted his death and i even think maybe i’m being overdramatic or a bit silly to still be...emotionally affected this way...but idk...idk what i’m saying anymore

I just hope that one day I’ll be able to come to terms with everything and look at SHINee the way i did before everything happened

#admin post #delete later #i just feel blegh #:(((#i hadn't thought of it as trauma #but when my mom told me #everything clicked

Hey guys it's Brittany! It feels a bit weird to be writing this for the last time. It doesn't even feel like it's been that long, but five years have already flown by....I'm honestly at a loss for words, but I want to thank you all who have been with me since the beginning and I want to thank those who joined me in the middle and towards the end.

And SHINee; Lee Jinki, Kim Jonghyun, Kim Kibum, Choi Minho and Lee Taemin...thank you for stepping into my life and lifting me up to places I never thought I'd ascend to. It's been an AMAZING and unforgettable journey with you five and I can't thank you enough. SHINee I love you so, so much. Thank you from the depths of my heart.

This song conveys the message I wish to convey to you my fellow shawols and friends, you are my friends and I hope that in some way my videos gave you a place to lay your head.

When I started this channel, I did so out of my own personal joy and with the thought of Jongkey in mind. But now I see that the name NothingbutSoulmates has become and means so much more. NothingbutSoulmates is a phrase meant for SHINee and shawols because we will always be...nothing but soulmates. Thank you. I love you.

#shinee #shawols #shawol #shinee world #last video #thank you so much #i love you guys