So things have gotten to a point of HECTIC, and URGENT, I need IMMEDIATE HELP so I won't go homeless again, I'm Mars I'm a black trans woman (born intersex)
TRIGGER.....TRIGGER...⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️
TriggerWarning/ I've gone thru constant discrimination and bigotry at MULTIPLE JOBS to the point it had to QUIT alot or it ESCALATED TO A POINT where I was fired for fighting back against ppl who SA'd me, assaulted me, harassed me, and abused me even PUBLICLY AT JOBS, whether it was an employee or customer, I had to sit back and rewrite to explain my situation more THOROUGHLY AGAIN, but alot of this is weighing on my MENTAL HEALTH, FINANCIAL STABILITY, ETC. I've gone to HR, court for SEVERAL YEARS now and still am going to court cases back to back every few months or so, it's a constant struggle and battle, though I lead a private life, alot of it is hardship and battles I've been fighting ALONE, trying to get help FINANCIALLY, MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES I'VE HAD TO EXHAUST GOING TO EVERY OPTION I CAN, TRYING TO RE-APPLY FOR JOBS, OR EVEN DISABILITY BECAUSE I WAS ALSO BORN ON THE AUTISTIC SPECTRUM DUE TO BEING BORN INTERSEX, it's not noticeable, but once ppl talk to me it's more noticeable MENTALLY, I talk fast as if im nervous to talk to ppl, I ramble, rant, and rave SPORADICALLY and SPONTANEOUSLY, it makes it so HARD TO BE AROUND PPL, especially since they've treated me like SHIT MY ENTIRE LIFE.
My struggle isn't one of "I can't find a job, im broke, im homeless", mine is more "i have a roof over my head for NOW, but now I dont have a job because I just went thru assault and harassment that affected my mental health for MONTHS ON END, and i finally let that job go and walked away from it, but now rent and bills are due again after paying em for months with the small bit of money I get paid from my job, now I no longer have that money it's all gone and i cant pay rent or bills" sometimes it's "I have a job, but i dont get paid enough to pay my entire bills, ima need help getting the other half or portion, but i can pay some of it", most ppl will tell you NOT TO QUIT A JOB BECAUSE OF THESE REASONS, but my MENTAL HEALTH/ILLNESSES are so BAD, that they're disorganized schizophrenia (sleep paralysis, out of body, can't tell reality from fantasy or sees ghosts) it's VERY BAD, i have a distorted brain from years of trauma, it makes it hard to apply everyday needs to jobs with my mental health, I get some ppl can work at jobs with mental illness=health issues, but mine is just too high of a level of mental health issues that:
I can't seem to HANDLE AT JOBS when it HAPPENS-
I SHUT DOWN, I CRY, I ISOLATE, I dont understand why it's so HARD FOR SOMEONE LIKE ME TO FIND SUPPORT, BUT IT REALLY FUCKING IS, I'M ACTUALLY LOSING MY MIND, I THINK ABOUT THROWING MYSELF FROM A BRIDGE EVERYDAY, I FEEL SO FUCKING WORTHLESS, ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW, so my RENT IS DUE BY THE END OF TODAY, I DIDN'T HAVE THE TIME TO MAKE A POST EARLIER, I WAS TRYING TO FIND MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES AS I SAID BEFORE, AND BEFORE I KNEW IT MY RENT WAS DUE, IMMEDIATELY AFTER I GOT HELP TO PAY ALL MY BILLS!!!
I have to pay at least 600 more dollars, rent is pretty cheap in Illinois for a one bedroom, my rent is 850, I paid 250 (all i had enough to pay), I'm DESPERATELY SEEKING ANYONE WHO CAN DONATE AND SHARE MY STORY, I've lived in fear my whole life because I never knee how to explain ANYTHING I GO THRU, I HOPE THIS EXPLAINS MORE, I've felt ALONE, trying to get help where I can, even FINANCIALLY.
My goal for rent: $600 (only need $487 more)
Below is a screenshot of current post update for another post, you'll see my Venmo: @Negrophiliac (im black by the way, means I love chocolate if yall get it misconstrued, it's not a racist remark or self hating),
