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@notveryfish
18, full of despair, terminal egghead. personal blog/ancient ritual site
art #myart
ocs #saltdudes #arquebusiers #flimki
coolpix #photo
#trialsposting → cruel institutional vexationsblogging (school. atcl. mun. american history)
2026 sketchbook #1
when i wake up remind me to make a post about the lack of blood in utena and what it means to have a world where suffering can only be beautiful or hidden
oh i should probably finish this thought lmfao. anyway of course there r the genre limitations of a shojo not being expected to show much blood, and of course the fact that the wounds caused in the duels are largely spiritual rather than physical. but there’s also something about how the entire world theyre inhabiting has a false quality to it: it’s a stage, an endless and eternal play where akio is the director. because the characters operate inside akio’s construction, wounds are only allowed to be as “real” as anything can be in this world. there’s no true bloodshed in a stage play after all; the characters need to be able to get up and perform again the next night.
i also think it signifies akio’s perpetual immaturity in its unwillingness to deal directly with difficult subjects. akio, as much as any of the other characters, is trapped at the school, perpetually unable to “graduate” and thus deal directly with the real world.
instead, bloodshed is transferred to the rose petals. losing your rose in the duel indicates an erosion of self, a loss of innocence, and anthy’s role as the gardener indicates her complicity in the violence of the duel games. is made even clear by the moments of real violence that are obscured by the endless spinning roses and reinforced in adolescence of utena when we see the dueling grounds now covered in a field of red roses, signifying the “bloodshed” that has occurred across countless duels.
oh i guess i should also add in contrast to the performative, beautiful violence of watching roses blow away on the breeze is the very real violence hidden at the center of the story: anthy, trapped by hundreds of swords piercing her, rendering her unable to move. violence against anthy is the mechanism that keeps the whole performance spinning, so that duels can be about flowers
refsheet for artfight! my creatura
First artfight attack of the year fuck it we ball… analise and marian belong to @triangleguy
my artfight
I think Shirley Jackson delves so well into the horror of self-consciousness. To be so aware of yourself, whether due to loneliness or not belonging or abuse, can be a monstrous experience that reduces your experience of the world to a series of mechanical processes. I will get up. I will cross the room in front of everyone. I will get a cup of water. I must drink the cup of water before I return in case it is odd to have it on the couch. They must not think I'm odd. Instead of swinging into the kitchen for a drink while laughing with friends. Mechanical processes are based on cause and effect, and if you are so used to thinking in terms of cause and effect, you can start applying that framework nonsensically out of a self-defensive need for control--which begs the question of what happens when defense becomes offense
EXPLOSION SOUND https://artfight.net/~notveryfish
come back and i'll forgive you
hockey szn
patterns left by woodworms on driftwood
sick, allergied, and cried the afternoon away. the pressure in my skull has reached industrial levels
WAR. IS. OVER
Life, it never die. Women are my favourite guy.
salix sp.
this might be a bit out of your purview but I’m trying to identify the artist of these illustrations from a 1962 children’s short story collection & was hoping you might be able to help. thanks for your time!
Cool art! I don't recognize the artist myself. Do any of my followers have any more info?
One year of her
