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@notyourbabymama
Numbers
Dinner Convo K: What is your favorite number? P: Frogs K: NO! NUMBER. P: Uh, chickens 🤷🏻♀️ K: Peeps a number, 123456789 P: Orange cats! K: PENELOPE I SAID A NUMBER P: umm, green? K: Forget about it. *break* P: I know my numbers *counts to 30*
Never having kids.
Kingston: Ugh Penelope you're stressing me out, be quiet! Penelope: ‼️🔆❇️ ((Babble screams)) Kingston: Penelope, I don't understand you!! Penelope: 😱😵😓😬👿 Kingston: Penelope, just hush no one cares about your life. Just sit and worry about yourself. Penelope: ((starts throwing shit)) Kingston: Penelope stop!!! Penelope: No you stop! ((Starts parroting him)) Kingston: Mom, I'm never having kids. They're so annoying. 🙌🏻😂👍🏻
Chubby.
Penelope: You're chubby mom mom. Me: Well, that's rude. Penelope: I have pretty eyes. Me: Do I have pretty eyes? Penelope: No, you have poopy eyes! 😒
A lesson on stranger danger
👇🏻 On the way home from school 👇🏻 Penelope: Hiiii 👋🏻 *waves at people in their cars/walking down the street Kingston: OH MY GOD PENELOPE DONT TALK TO THEM! They are strangers, do you know what strangers are? Penelope: 😳 Kingston: Strangers are people we do not know. Not even mom and Chris. When a stranger comes to you, you scream as loud as you can, and run away. If it's a boy stranger that's like a guy, you kick him in his penis! Kick and kick! Okay?! If it's a girl you punch her in the tit!! Then you run and get mom or dad or a police officer or Jackie. Penelope: *singing* Kingston: Are you even paying attention Penelope?! Penelope: 😒 Just shut up, go away! *hits him in the face with her doll* The end.
You're the real MVP.
Y'all, I've been stressed the last few days over some stupid adult stuff 🙄 nothing a trip to Target can't fix right? WRONG. Penelope terrorized the entire store and us 😒 She was talking loud, hiding, almost fell out of the cart, got ran over the cart, was licking EVERYTHING 😝 I was so upset/stressed I was sweating like crazy. As we are checking out she asks for some Goldfish, a pony, chocolate, Legos, soda, a USB port and all that other crap that's there. Turns to run from me because I said no, knocks it all over 😩 The lady checking us out is laughing along with the mom behind me who has 3 pre-teens/teens saying "Oh I remember those days, don't worry I doesn't last forever." I'm like I know I'm throwing her in the dumpster on the way out 👍🏻🙌🏻👋🏻 I haul ASS to the car because now Willa is screaming 😱 because she's starving... Shit shit shit... I throw the kids in the car, leaving the doors open so they don't get locked in while I put stuff in the car. I turn around to find ALL of those stupid foam shoes thrown out of the car into the parking lot 😡😤😠 I pick them up, and I throw them at her. Not even going to lie 😂 and she's covering her ears yelling LALALALALALALALA!, so I pop her on the leg (calm down FB police!) and she laughs and then looks me right in the eye... And starts screaming like a stabbed her 😾 making everyone look at us AND waking up Willa. Then, screamed "Mommy is a bad girl" and "Shut up!" (Ugh I know I know judge me) the whoooole way home while I attempted to talk to Emmy. Ugh. WHY DEAR GOD WHY?! 🙄 She's so crazy sometimes I swear. 0 to 100, and then back to being so sweet. To all those mamas and dadas who have survived as toddler terror: You the real MVP ✊🏻
Salad
Tonight I made the kids their dinners, kid versions of what us adults were having. They start eating while I'm waiting for Chris to get home. Peeps sees me making a salad and says 'I want that please!', I was over the moon. One of my kids was finally getting on the salad train! I made her the best salad ever, she picked out all the veggies she wanted! So pumped! ALL THE VEGGIES! Y'all... She licked & sucked all the dressing off each piece and said 'All done' 😩😂😭😾😢😤😒
EVERYONE (it feels like) has posted about this app. I for one think it's an AMAZING idea/invention. Every.single.day children and babies get left in the car and DIE. Why? Because Grandma isn't used to having a newborn, Mommy has PPD and is a wreck, Daddy hasn't slept in weeks, a new addition on top of the other children. Sure 'everyone' goes thru it, but def not on the same level. Did the majority of these incidents happen on purpose? Nope. Some of these parents probably posted articles on Facebook about how they would never leave their kid in the car and how could someone do such a thing? The fact that this could and probably will save some babies and kids makes me HAPPY. I'm all for anything that can easy the blow of parenting just a tad. I mean, could anyone imagine not having swings, bouncy chairs, teething rings and the numerous other things that aren't needed but are 100% nice to have?
Skin Flaps.
"Mom you're going to be so old when I become a police officer. You're going to be so wrinkly we will be able to play with your skin flaps. You know? Stretch them and make shapes out of them." -Kingston Thanks 🙄 you're such a gem kid. A real keeper 😾
August 13, 2012
Me: "Don't drink your bath water, you just peed in it!" Kingston: "... But it makes my tummy feel better...." Ewwww.
August 13, 2014
My husband works hard. Really hard. He is the sole financial provider to our family. He wakes up every week day morning at 5:15 to make over an hour commute, works all day in the hot sun, drives over an hour back... To me, the kids and the dogs. He is beyond exhausted a lot of days. That being said he still helps out daily with the kids, dogs, house and errands. No complaints, all he needs is a whiskey coke and a big kiss. It really is the "little things"... I'm lucky & thankful to have him as my person 💕
August 13,2014
Kingston: Mom I want a black baby brother Me: Babe, mommy and Chris can only make white babies, like sister... Kingston: Well... I guess I'll take a white baby brother then *sighs*
Over here just strokin' out.
Y'all. So, I won't let Peeps in the garage with me because I'm getting ready to have a garage sale and I don't want her digging thru stuff. She has been really upset by this the last few days.... Well, I went out to put some stuff in the boxes and left the door open. Peeps comes behind me and I tell her not to come out in the garage. She says 'Bye mommy....' Y'all. SHE LOCKED ME IN THE GARAGE 😩😱😭😰 I asked her to unlock the door and she goes: 'Hmmmm no, no thank you... Byyyyyyyye', and I can hear her walk off. I panic. Straight panic. My phone and keys are inside. THE BABY IS INSIDE. I'm outside. I bang on the door, but King can't hear me 😫 and for about 5 minutes my dumb self forgets we have a garage door opener 😾 I get out and I'm ringing the doorbell non-stop. Peeps is inside going 'No thank you!', telling me to go away, and I can hear her singing and dancing around. It's so hot. Feels like Satan is breathing on my neck after he ran a marathon. Sweet Willa FINALLY saves the day by crying 😂 Peeps yells thru the door 'Baby crying! Baby crying!' And I'm all LET ME IN (shit!) She finally unlocks the door and I kid you not asks me "What you doing outside mommy?" 😠 YOU LOCKED ME OUT 👊🏻 you little terror 😾 #BeerMe #TerrorSquadTales #DailyBirthControl #LifeAsALowry
I told myself that I would be able to walk a mile today pushing the girls in 18 minutes, I got pretty close! I probably could have done it in one try if Penelope hadn't deleted the first part after .47 miles 🙄 and then we had to restart 😾 Still pretty proud since I haven't done cardio of any type in over a year 😱 My goal is to get back to a 15 minute walk/8 minute run while pushing the babes. Baby steps tho baby steps
#FamilyPicture #TBT #ThrowBackThursday
January 2016
Without ANY prompting ask your kids these questions. It's a great way to see what they think. Copy and repost with your answers Kingston, Age 6 1. What is something I always say to you? "Clean up." 2. What makes me happy? "Me being a good boy." 3. What makes me sad? "Me not following directions." 4. How do I make you laugh? "By being funny, you're hilarious." 5. What was I like as a child? "Crazy, probably." 6. How old am I? "Maybe 24." 7. How tall am I? "14 feet." 8. What is my favorite thing to do? "Hanging out with your family." 9. What do I do when you're not around? "You just wait for me to come home..." 10. What am I really good at? "Making breakfast." 11. What am I not very good at? "Controlling my sister and putting her diaper on." 12. What do I do for a job? "Teach the babies." 13. What is my favorite favorite food? "Maybe Chinese food." 14. What do you enjoy doing with me? "Watching family shows and talking about stuff." 15. If I were famous, what would I be? "A rock star!" 16. How are we the same? How are we different? "We have the same blood." "You're a girl and I'm a boy." 17. How do you know I love you? "Because you always treat me nice." 18.) Where is my favorite place to go? "Chili's it's a family place... Or do you mean somewhere without your friends or family... Maybe a hotel. Yeah a hotel by yourself." 19.) What do I love most about Chris? "Getting his lovin'" 20.) How old was I when you were born? "Hmmmm like 19 years old."
I support ______ but ________ ...
Here are some points that were addressed: Pump? -Not every woman can pump, some literally get NOTHING when they pump. A pump is a poor substitute for a latch. If you can't pump, you can't use a bottle of breast milk. Plus you have to bring a warmer and timer (breast milk can and does expire) and all kinds of other paraphernalia. Cover? -Once a baby can grasp with their hands, bye bye cover! Plus it's TEXAS (where I'm at). It's hot like 95% of the time. The "Use a light blanket" isn't doable. Can you put a light blanket on your head for 45 minutes every few hours? Torture. My kids sweat just sitting still, naked lol Formula? -I'm not against formula, however, it's not my top choice. Yes, that is a personal choice and one many other women have made. Also, going breast to bottle is *not* easy for all babies or mothers. They have two very different mechanisms. Do you HAVE to whip your tit out? -Yes and no. Yes you have to feed your baby because it HURTS if you don't AND you can get infection. No, no one has to see your ENTIRE breast unless you want to show it and they don't know how to advert their eyes. What about the other children? -Children are exposed every day to nudity/half nudity, they will be fine. A woman feeding her child *IS* different than the woman sitting next to you with 3/4 of her cleavage out or the woman in a string bikini because FEEDING A BABY is NOT sexual. If people would normalize it and not try to make it something shameful and 'private' there wouldn't be an issue.
What is wrong? What is right?
Random quiet time thought(s): When I had Kingston, I could easily monitor his every move. It was just me and him. I knew what he was doing/where he was going, which wasn't hard because he was my only focus. Then I had Penelope, and things shifted. Kingston was left to entertain himself while I fed Penelope, rocked her, changed her or whatever else she needed. It felt wrong to me to make him stay right by me while I did these mundane tasks. Did he need to be right by me? Was I being a horrible parent by letting him play 'unsupervised' in another room? Hmmm... Now I have 3 kids, and I constantly think about the "right thing". Is it wrong that my kids play in their own rooms? Is it wrong that they watch Netflix or play on their tablets? Is it wrong Kingston does homework alone? Is it wrong that I'm not watch watch watch watching them? Is it wrong they don't get baths every single night? Is it wrong that sometimes they eat breakfast for dinner because I am in fact L-A-Z-Y at times? Is it wrong that I tell my kids they're driving me crazy? Is it wrong I hide in my closet sometimes to drink a beer in peace and regroup? Is it wrong that my kids never have matching clothes on? Is it wrong that I don't make all my kids stay in the bathroom together so one of them doesn't set this place a blaze?! I read thru a plethora of Facebook statuses every day mixed with news articles and links. There is just so much pressure I feel like when it comes to parenting. Any accident is the parents fault, with no remorse. As a parent you can NOT be there 24/7, it's impossible no matter how badly you want it. You also shouldn't be made to feel guilty with a non-lift threatening event happens, because you can't always be in control of your children or the situations around them. Some of y'all, and probably even myself included, are going to have a shit ton of grey hair with all this stressin'...