[kokichiyandere]

i hate my mom she will not let me wear the ouma costume to the mall even though it gives me ouma dysphoria without it i might just start slapping people i pass in savers today that will really show her i shouldnt be fucked with 

[nozukes]

Ylou guys are all wayyyy too liberal and soy i miss old IRONY tumblr im going to go look at that old oumer blog

[thegreatlearning]

I just realized that a lot of my followers don’t even know my whole deal

[comikbook]

why did i get the eating disorder hotline for deedee megadoodoo

[iguanamouth]

My boyfriend won’t stop talking to me about whether or not I would eat Pokémon steaks. We think maybe Mr. Mime steaks would have white meat and ooze a purple liquid. I feel like you’re the only one qualified to tell us more

listen the ONLY part of a mr mime thats edible are the red spots, and thats ONLY after being properly cooked - if you bite into any part of their body while its still raw youll suffer near immediate food poisoning

luckily, just like red kidney beans, the potential toxins are easily to remove provided you take the right steps

once theyve been safely removed from their inedible surroundings, the larger red spheres are ready to begin working with - its worth noting that the smaller spots on the hands and cheeks also fall into this category, but theyre almost always too small to be considered harvesting by most professionals 

youll want to start by cutting away any flesh thats still directly touching the pale parts; when in doubt, a wider cut is always preferred. better safe than sorry ! one benefit of working with mr mimes is that, along with many others in their typing, their bodies are held together with physic energy and thus dont require deboning

the next part is going to require boiling in a large pressure cooker- some may find it a challenge to to find a pot big enough to host all the parts, so cooking them individually is fine. remember to follow the instructions to the letter

after theyve been removed and dried, an easy way to text if theyre safe to eat is to cut them in half and check the spongy center - a darkened purple core means theyve been boiled long enough, while any lighter, greenish tints means you probably needed a bit more time

once theyre out of the danger range, you can now safely use them in variety of dishes ! their almost mushroom-like texture means they absorb flavors well, and pictured above is one of my personal favorites

THIS guy though, you can just pop em into your mouth whole. its fine

[minmoh-remade-deactivated201811]

its fine

[iguanamouth]

its fine

[nozukes]

thinking about this tonight... the crouton.net link. yeah thats pure tumblr gold. this shit is so pure i could snort it

[nozukes]

infinite jesters grab your entertainment

[nozukes]

infinite jesters grab your tennis balls

[yuppiesnpuppies]

How it feels

[alexromero]

It’s over, isn’t it? What’s over? This. Us. Playing house. All of it. I never actually thought they’d come back. So they’re back! Nothing’s changed.

[dogpuppy]

[squeakitties]

i just rescued a pill bug they’re gonna reward me with a million pill bucks i’m gonna be a fucking pillionaire

[giant-isopod-overlord]

💵🫲}([[[[[)

[squeakitties]

I JUST MADE ONE PILLION DOLLARS

[pmamtraveller]

René Magritte

The Dream of the Androgyne (1945)

[aforest2006remaster]

yesterday i made a beetle out of soda tabs and wire. we took the bus home.

[nozukes]

i got 5 on it

[powerbottombrucespringsteen]

There was a movie called Juno and the songs featured on that movie were compiled into an official soundtrack. This is generally regarded as major historical event from the 2000’s.

[bgm05]

Fuck knowledge and ideas

[albertnatural]

who wants to come to my bedroom and watch me smoke weed and bang my head against the wall

[ieatgrassandthatsathreat]

Stares at mama with love in my eyes

[albertnatural]