[just-incorrect-beastars]

Legosi: Louis! My ex roommates asked me to come to dinner!

Louis: Interesting! No wait, what‘s the word? Oh, who cares.

Legosi: C’mon, it’ll be fun! You’ll see how I lived before meeting you!

Louis: You lived before meeting me?

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Announcer: Before we take off, please make sure all small items are secure.

Legosi: *checking Louis’s seatbelt*

Louis: What the fuck are you doing?

Legosi: Do you feel safe?

Louis: I will murder you in your sleep.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno: I made this friendship bracelet for you.

Durham: You know, I’m not really a jewellery person.

Miguno: You don’t have to wear it.

Durham: No. I’m gonna wear it forever. Back off.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno: What time is it?

Durham: I do not know, but pass me that trombone and I’ll find out.

Durham: [blows trombone loudly]

Jack: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING TROMBONE AT 2AM?

Miguno: Thanks, hon.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno: [can’t stop smiling]

Durham: Why are you so happy?

Miguno: I’m going out on a date with my boyfriend tomorrow

Durham: Oh…. Okay.

Miguno: Yeah, so.. you free tomorrow?

Durham, on the verge of tears:

Collot: Damn, that was smooth.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Jack: Hey, Miguno, I like your top!

Miguno: Thanks! I just got it yester-

Durham: I have a name.

Miguno:

Jack:

Collot, in the distance: *bursts into laughter*

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Jack: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous; if it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.                

Collot: What if it bites me and it dies?                

Voss: That means you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Collot, learn to listen.           

Legosi: What if it bites itself and I die?                

Jack: It’s voodoo.                

Legosi: What if it bites me and someone else dies?                

Jack: That’s correlation, not causation.                

Durham: What if we bite each other and neither of us die?                

Miguno: That’s kinky.                

Jack: Oh my god.                

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno: I’ve noticed we have slowly begun to phase the ‘b’ out of our bromance

Durham, on one knee, ring still out: I mean, yeah, i fucking guess 

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Durham: I’ve never had a best friend before.

Miguno: Aawwwww, I will be your best friend!

Durham:

Durham: I've also never had a boyfriend before

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Durham: So you play in a band. Any other secrets I should know about?

Miguno: I'm gay.

Durham: I said secrets.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Durham: I have written a small list of reasons I love Miguno.

Jack: That's 10 pages.

Durham: I wanted to keep it brief.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Jack: How was your honeymoon?

Durham: Miguno got drunk and burned our marriage certificate while screaming “try and return me now without the receipt b*tch!”

Jack:

Durham: So, ya know, the best time of my life.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Durham, at his wedding: This is the second gayest thing I’ve ever done, the first one being my husband

Miguno:

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Durham: So I’m bi-

Miguno: [gasps hopefully]

Durham: -lingual. Bilingual. I speak two languages.

Miguno: [takes a sip of water, disappointed]

Durham: Also, I like dudes.

Miguno: [spits out water]

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Jack: So who’s the clingy one in the relationship?

Durham, sitting on Miguno’s lap, his arms wrapped around his neck, and head resting on his head :  Miguno, obviously.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno: If you need anything, I’m available 24/6!

Collot: you mean 24/7?

Miguno: no, Sundays are hang out with Durham days.

[just-incorrect-beastars]

Miguno, seeing Durham for the first time : I’m not going home straight.

Jack: I think you mean “I’m not going straight home.”

Miguno: No. I mean “I’m not going home straight.”