What is Cheese?

16 weeks of cakes, chocolate, marzipan and theory until graduation.

[zarischarlie]

Reblog if you’re the gay sister

[did-you-know]

Manny the cat was a stray that showed up right after his new owner had lost his previous cat. One day, he went to a photo shoot his new human, became obsessed with a GoPro, accidentally learned to take selfies, and never looked back. 

WHAT’S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE:

Source

[bappschonsphiddy]

@nyssanotnicer

[nyssanotnicer]

Manny! There's a mouse right fucking there!! @bappschonsphiddy

[wilwheaton]

Jimmy Kimmel mansplained political campaigning to Hillary Clinton

Whether you’re voting Democrat, Republican, or throwing your vote away on some silly third-party candidate, you’ve likely seen plenty of examples of mansplaining during this campaign season. (And every other season, really: That’s the joy of mansplaining!) But last night, Hillary Clinton got a useful dose of it from Jimmy Kimmel, after she defined it for him as the act of a man explaining something to a woman in a patronizing way. “Actually, it’s when a man explains something to a woman in a condescending way. But you were close,” he says helpfully, demonstrating why it’s so important that guys continue to help women out in this manner.

I am not a fan of either of them, but this is absolutely brilliant satire.

[nyssanotnicer]

@bappschonsphiddy

[warp6]

some squares inspired by STV fandom humor, with special thanks to personal space tracker @galinaredreznikov and to @pixiedane for careful monitering of all space cloud activity

[nyssanotnicer]

@bappschonsphiddy

[stability]

[nyssanotnicer]

We already have two @bappschonsphiddy but they don't have onesies..,

[nyssanotnicer]

Photo 1: Omg! It looks great! Photo 2: Whhhhhhhhy!!! Photo 3-5: a decent recovery and my amazing team mates.

[nyssanotnicer]

Day Two Week Five

There was no Wednesday class this week due to a public holiday for the local Royal Show, a display put on every year where essentially the country comes to the city.  Producers of everything from cattle to chickens, pumpkins to apples compete for awards as well as there being the general sideshow attractions.

While usually a day off school is welcome in this case it was just frustrating firstly because I really enjoy school, secondly because it was one less day we had to work on our showpieces and Thursday was our last day to assemble them.

Every time we’ve worked on the showpiece we’ve achieved a little more and it is both nerve wracking and exciting to finally see the whole thing come together.  My team was well ahead of most others so there was a lot of hurry up and wait, we still had to do a bit of work assembling the white arum lilies for the piece which I wasn’t allowed to touch at Susan and Lisa’s behest because of my smouldering hot hands.

We finally had enough of the class up to the air brushing point and started spraying the piece with a black cocoa butter spray, this gives the whole piece a lovely black shiny finish and makes other colours really pop.  It was surprisingly difficult to tell when you had enough colour on the sculpture as it was black being sprayed onto dark chocolate but sure enough with enough layers it worked.

We carefully transferred it back to our bench and started getting ready to attach the other pieces (milk and white chocolate vines and flowers), I turned to wash the black cocoa butter off my hands and heard Susan shriek... Then there was the crash...

And that my friends is how my very first chocolate showpiece crashed to the ground and shattered into a million pieces.

Upon reflection it was decided the most likely culprit was the room temperature, my class is the biggest they’ve ever run.  We had 16 people, plus two instructors, 4 chocolate melting tanks and an air compressor running in a very small room so even though the air con was cranked to make it as cold as possible it still became much to warm too quickly.

As Chef Ben told us, everyone loses a showpiece and our resilience in the face of disaster was admirable.  We salvaged what we could and resculpted a smaller slightly chicken-like showpiece.

[rennaiseancee]

[bappschonsphiddy]

nyssanotnicer is this what TAFE assessment’s like?

[nyssanotnicer]

Depending on the chef... Yes. If it's German, Australian or French chef - definitely. If it's Italian chef, no cause *in thick Italian accent* "it's alright, it's okay mate"

[nyssanotnicer]

Day One Week Four

We have begun the showpiece work in earnest now, gone are the meticulous details that come with moulded or enrobed chocolates.  Enter the crazy equipment that we Macgyver uses from to create insane chocolate shapes.

Tempering is still required and yes I have been able to do it every single time, first time no problems.  Stupid assessment day and unnecessary stress!

Last week Chef Ben detailed what exactly we were setting out to create, an abstract tree everyone worked on their tree stump which I discussed in my last post.  Stage two was making the granite looking stone wheel out of chocolate and inclusions, making modelling chocolate, shaping and pouring ‘wings’ for the piece.

In order to make our wheel of chocolate look like it was made of granite Chef Ben supplied us with cocoa butter chips (just like chocolate chips, but bits of cocoa butter instead) that had been dyed green and black, then we also cut down white chocolate pieces into nubbly bits.  This was all folded through tempered dark chocolate and pressed into a mould.  The idea being that once popped out and shaved back, the colours would come through the chocolate and look like a slab of granite with different minerals embedded in it.

Modelling chocolate is far less impressive than it sounds, using a robocoup (a specific type of food processor), chocolate pieces and a spatula the chocolate is ground down until it forms a stiff almost paste.  You can then mould it much like plasticine into shapes or in our case rolled into long vines.  It was during this process that I discovered my true value to my classmates.

it’s important to keep the chocolate warm but not melted.  As it’s ground down kinetic heat forms keeping it sightly warmed and pliable, as soon as you stop it moving the chocolate begins to cool and harden. As soon as it goes hard you’ve got to start all over again, so an ability to keep it warm and useable is a blessing.  As it turns out I have pretty warm hands, women generally have smaller hands which makes it harder to keep a reasonable amount of chocolate warm.

I ended up being passed around “massaging” chocolate to keep it useable, but as Chef Ben says it’s about working as a team and understanding what you can bring to the table and if you bring hot hands well so be it. 

[nyssanotnicer]

Day Two, Week Three

After yesterday I scooped my brain back together and bravely turned up for Tafe again.  Turns out my bravery was rewarded as today we started chocolate showpieces!

By far the question I’ve been asked most when people ask me what unit I’m currently doing is ‘what are chocolate showpieces?’.  It’s actually pretty simple, they are sculptures made of chocolate.  They are not intended to be eaten, though they smell amazing.  And it’s not as simple as melting chocolate and pouring it into moulds to make shapes.

To start with we did a short theory lesson on what makes a good showpiece, the rule of thirds, techniques, colours and shapes that are pleasing to the eye and how important movement is in a static object. 

Then it was on to the moulding!  We split into teams of three to construct our showpieces, every team creates their own but it’s all based around the same design which is an abstract tree concept.  I am working with my two best friends in the course Tafe Mum and Big Spoon, yes some of us are being given nicknames by the rest of the class. 

Tafe Mum is the oldest in our class and as she reminds us all of timetable changes, what to remember to bring and ALWAYS seems to have a spare spatula she’s just like having a mum around.  Big Spoon is the same age as me, we sometimes get referred to as The Aunties, as we are usually with Tafe Mum.  But Big Spoon came about as she shares the same first name as one of the other girls, but is much much taller. So there’s Big Spoon and Little Spoon.

Once we were in our teams it was time to start work on the base, my team chose to go with a Morten Bay Fig inspired tree trunk wit lots of cascading tree roots.  Using half spherical moulds we constructed the centre of the trunk that would offer support, then using modelling chocolate we built up around the internal support structure.  What I found most surprising was how very similar chocolate modelling is to working with clay.  The texture, consistency and techniques are all very much interchangeable.

By the end of class we had a workable tree base and an idea of where we were going.  Chocolate showpieces will be our practical class for the next two weeks, which I’m looking forward to more than I originally thought I would.  

[nyssanotnicer]

Day One Week Three

Week three and we are already in assessment.  Unlike some courses at culinary school as we finish each unit we have the practical assessment immediately following it.  This usually means that we are on a constant cycle of learning and being tested.  This is both good, because everything is still freshly imprinted, and bad, because it is exhausting.

This week we finished our ‘produce chocolate confectionary’ unit which meant assessment time and it was a massacre.  Every student had to produce a ganache, enrobed chocolates and moulded chocolates that were filled with the ganache.  Out of a class of 16 approximately 30% passed all three sections successfully.

I was fine with making the ganache and prepping my moulds.  But in order to enrobe and cast the moulds with chocolate you needed to temper the chocolate. Now while I achieved that last lesson with relative ease as I finally had everything click so to speak, today that was not the case. 

I must ave tried at least a dozen times to get the chocolate to behave, I fluked it once and was able to enrobe my caramels but other than that it was not happening.  I was flustered, hot, and stressing my poor brain.  You get two attempts to pass the chocolate unit, so even though I knew I’d be allowed to try again - I don’t fail things in the kitchen.

By the end of the day, and it was a loooooong day 8am-3:30pm with no break, I was a mess.  I’d done the ganache and enrobing and was confident they would both pass, my first batch of moulded chocolates were not in temper.  Finally it was all too much and I had a small meltdown (I was not the only one) the instructors made go out of the room, get a drink and take a breather.

I’m proud to say I did go back an with Chef Rob (metaphorically) holding my hand I tempered sufficient chocolate to complete my moulded chocolates.  According to Chef Ben it’s common to struggle with tempering early on when you get stressed, as you get hot and flustered it becomes more difficult to feel the temperature of the chocolate against your skin, which we rely on as we are not allowed to use thermometers.

After such an emotional tumultuous day, where I did actually pass all three components, all I wanted was to go home and sleep for a week.

Naturally the very next day I tempered a giant vat of chocolate first go no drama *facepalm*

[nyssanotnicer]

Week Two, Day Two.

Yesterday was EPIC.  So epic that I’m not getting to this post until today, we covered a lot of information around the techniques used in chocolate making.  This time instead of enrobing we focused on molded chocolates and the various techniques that can be used with molding.

Starting out with theory again Chef Ben ran us through the use of an airbrush machine, in order to colour the inside of the molds.  This is done with a melted and tempered cocoa butter that has colour added, the cocoa butter also helps give the chocolates a real boost to their shine.  We also looked at edible lustre dusts and the different ways you can apply these or the cocoa butter colour.

Obviously having a great deal more experience than us Chef Ben works like a machine and quickly churned out some incredible looking shells that showcased the different techniques we had spent the previous hour discussing. 

Then it was onto the tempering and learning how to properly fill a mold.  Which is of course where things start to get messy, we wear chef whites except they are now more like chef browns as the chocolate goes everywhere!

There wasn’t really anything I struggled with during this lesson, unlike the previous day were it was five attempts before I could temper successfully by myself.  My tempering came off without a hitch, I was even able to help out a couple of classmates who were struggling with theirs.

By far the most rewarding part of the whole lesson was turning out the finished chocolates.  Everyone had at least moderate success, though most lost a couple due to incorrect or uneven filling.  Of my two trays the only chocolates I lost were to people’s mouths, it is remarkable how all the other chefs at school seem to know when the food is ready and appear ready and willing to eat. To be fair, Chef Stefan did trade me freshly baked quiches which ended up being lunch!

Next week is our assessment for the chocolate work, we have to produce enrobed and molded chocolates by ourselves.  It is a difficult course, there is usually a handful of people who fail each time.  Chef Ben has reassured me that my chocolates were quite good and should I produce the same work next week I will pass no problem. 

[nyssanotnicer]

Dark and milk chocolates filled with cherry gel and a dark chocolate paprika ganache.  Check out the shine in the close ups!

[nyssanotnicer]

Day One, Week Two

Enrobing has nothing to do with wizards or Harry Potter but is equally as magical.  Today we revisited tempering, as I conquered the seeding method last week I needed to work on tabeling this time.  Four attempts later and with Chef Ben giving me massive amounts of emotional support I finally managed it, tempered a small amount of milk chocolate.

I was surprised at how emotionally draining it was to try again and again to do something which is deceptively simple.  All tempering involves is taking warm chocolate and introducing movement and cooling in order to form good beta crystals, admittedly I was using milk which is more difficult and we are also banned from using thermometers.

After my bench partner and I finished enrobing with the small amount of tempered chocolate we had, I decided it was time to try it again myself.  After all we have assessment next week and we need to be able to temper by ourselves.

For the 5th attempt I again went with the milk chocolate but this time used a larger amount, with the intention that a larger quantity would cool less quickly thus giving me more time to work with it.  It took over 20 minutes but I FUCKING DID IT.  I tempered milk chocolate, by myself, without the use of a thermometer.  Pretty damned pleased with myself.

The beauty of my class is that through all my frustration and threats that I would cry Chef Ben was patient, knowledgeable and encouraging.  I’ve posted before about how well I respond to an enthusiastic teacher, but I also respond well to praise and positive reinforcement.  After finally getting everything tempered and moving on to the enrobing Chef Ben told me how nicely everything was covered, no gaps and minimal feet and a nice clean finish to the chocolate.  Made everything worth it.

Tomorrow we start moulded chocolates, and we are playing with airbrushing coloured cocoa butter.  Very excited about this!

[nyssanotnicer]

Day Two, Week One.

I am utterly shattered, wrecked, exhausted, all of the above.  There is so much we have to cover this semester, I honestly think my brain may melt from information overload.

We started the day with an hour of chocolate theory, probably not quite as boring as other theory classes!  We covered topics like the origins and cultivation of cacao trees, the different types of chocolate as well as the different methods of conching and possibly the most significant was learning the characteristics of chocolate.  Much like wine, chocolate has a depth of flavour that can be described in five different aspects: cacao, sweetness, acidity, fruity and bitterness.

After finishing in the theory room we moved back to the confectionery kitchen where the fun stuff really got underway, firstly with a chocolate tasting!  Chef Ben had a variety of different chocolates for us to try, firstly it was recognizing the difference between compound (or cooking) chocolate and couveture chocolate.  Primarily compound is cheap and nasty, it contains no cocoa butter but rather uses vegetable fats as the emulsifying agent.  Couveture on the other hand, has the beautiful mouth feel and melt to it because it contains cocoa butter a naturally occurring fat.

The smell of couveture is indescribable.  Especially when directly compared to compound, it has this sweet but earthy scent whereas white couveture smells sweet and buttery.  Compound smells like plastic, I had never before noticed quite so obviously the two chocolates are miles apart.

After we were all bouncing off the walls on a sugar high from the chocolate tasting we moved to the first practical for the day, learning to temper chocolate.  Tempering chocolate is important as it gives chocolate it’s glossy finish, audible snap and helps to promote stability in the chocolate so it can handle minimal temperature fluctuations.

Chef Ben did an amazing demo to get us started, watching someone as skilled as he is handling melted chocolate is truly a joy.  While I had more success with the seeding method, Chef Ben favours the tabeling method which is basically a big puddle of melted chocolate on a table being moved around with a palette knife and scraper.

Everyone had to attempt both methods, we all had varying degrees of success and a lot of chocolate on everything and everywhere.  We spent the remainder of the day cutting our items from the previous class prepping them for enrobing next week, it was pretty neat to see the things we’d made earlier all set and ready to be turned into real confectionery.

Next week we start molding chocolates, which will mean more tempering and more of me smelling like a walking candy store.  Not that I’m complaining. 

[nyssanotnicer]

Day One Week One

Today was our first day back after mid year break, and we started a much anticipated unit: Chocolate.  For the next five weeks the practical I will be studying will be all things chocolate, I am personally pretty excited about this.  Chocolate has always been something of my own kryptonite, possibly it’s living in a humid climate, but tempering, molding and enrobing have never come easily.

Fortunately I have an amazing teacher in the form of Chef Ben, known as the resident chocolate expert at school I’ve seen some of his showpieces and they are nothing short of incredible.  He’s exceedingly passionate about chocolate and cooking in general, being taught by someone passionate is infinitely a pleasurable experience and I find a lot of his enthusiasm rubbing off on me and upping my own already wired nature regarding patisserie.

We started with easy thins after five weeks off, making centres for enrobing.  When chocolate is enrobed it is a centre or filling that is then coated in chocolate, either by hand or by a mechanized enrobing machine.  This is as opposed to molded chocolates where the chocolate is melted and shaped *then* filled.

Enrobed chocolates tend to be firmer as then need to stand up to be handled and moved around, molded chocolates tend to have softer flowing fillings.  As such today each of us worked with a partner and had to produce a batch of nougat for cutting into bars and dipping tomorrow, some of us were also fortunate enough to make other items for enrobing.  My partner and I made an item to be coated much like a chocolate bar with a spiced biscuit base, a pobana (a fruit cocktail of passionfruit, mango, banana and lemon) pâte de fruit (type of fruit jelly set with pectin) and a chocolate marshmallow all layered like a Twix bar.  Tomorrow we will cut and cover these delicious treats in chocolate!

The pâte de fruit was not something I was familiar with, I had to make two attempts at activating the pectin before it worked, and having no made a ‘bar’ like this before either pouring the hot jelly became something of a dangerous exercise, it went *everywhere*! The biscuit base shrank slightly during baking which meant there were gaps, our tray had holes in it (which bear in mind it is supposed to) but we didn’t think to put down silicone paper first so the upshot of all this was me, the stove, the floor and the cooling racks covered in pobana fruit jelly.  Tasted good though!

It all worked out in the end and tomorrow is another day, fingers crossed everything cuts cleanly and the dipping goes smoothly.