Wow, Fantastic Baby

Reblogs a lot of Pokemon and untagged critters (including snakes and insects). Rambles about webnovels. 29. F. In a Love/Hate relationship with languages and trying to learn them. Icon credit @globox

[mortalityplays]

there a lot of details of american macroculture that have caused what I'd describe as a reality fracturing mental reset when I learned about them. one was learning that children do literally swear their allegiance to the american flag every morning before school and that's not a quaint comedic exaggeration left over from the 1950s like rabbit ears on a TV. one was learning that Americans have to pay for ambulance transportation. one was learning that Americans are taught the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki were tough brave necessities that made the world safer and not horrific war crimes on a footing with the nazi holocaust.

and one was learning that the cultural cachet of veggietales is completely unironic and a lot of you watched the parables of God from the bible and his son jesus christ the cgi vegetable for real real and thought it was good, no goofing, not a bit

[mortalityplays]

thank you small americans in my phone for correcting me: beloved cgi bible show did not portray the son of god as a vegetable, because that would have been sacrilegious

[herpsandbirds]

BUGS IS SHRIMPS.

[lakevida]

free the nipple has to make a resurgence for a number of reasons but bro look at our upcoming eternity of wet bulb temps youre smoking straight up cock if you think im keeping a shirt on when it hits 105° in new england

[loreleywrites]

you solve the mystery of what to have for dinner one night and you think "hell yeah case closed forever" WRONG there is a dinner mystery the next night too

[lastvalyrian]

> medical problem > unsure if it's serious or will go away on its own > sees a doctor to be sure > "why the fuck are you here. this is nothing. it will go away on its own"

[lastvalyrian]

> medical problem > unsure if it's serious or will go away on its own > decide to wait to not overreact > problem remains > sees doctor with concrete problem after all > "why did you wait so long. we could have done something if you had come immediately"

[the-big-mood]

I didn’t realize there were so many people getting destroyed by mattresses 😂

[theswordofdamntheseknees]

I love these so much.

[genjichu]

[spiribia]

do you want a warm, weighted, vibrating plushie that acts like a heat seeking missile and intermittently stabs you? What I have just described to you is Felis catus and there is a dark secret to it

[worsecats]

Come closer... learn my secret...

[oatmealstreetfighter]

I was having a very bad time the other day and I thought to myself "I just want to lay in bed and play a game that I haven't already played a million hours of. Fuck it, I'm going to splurge and buy a game on the Switch."

So I grabbed my card, grabbed the Switch, opened up the store, fully prepared to waste up to $60 and then I scrolled.... and I scrolled..... and I realized that pretty much the only game I was seriously interested in on the Switch was actually an exclusive for the Switch 2. I briefly considered Tomodachi Life because I've played the demo and I've watched streams of it and I'm sure I WOULD enjoy it but I simply do not think I would enjoy it to the degree of the $50 or so that it costs. And so I did not waste any of my money after all. Thank you, Nintendo Switch, for your somewhat boring and overpriced selection of games

[yokowan]

dont store a knife with the point facing down, it damages the blade. no, dont do that either. when you store it with the point facing up you might accidentally hurt yourself when you try to grab it. dont store a knife at all actually. your blade must never leave your hand, always ready, ruthless and waiting. you know deep down that ever since you learned the stench of blood you will never be able to cast it aside. or just get a sheath for it i guess.

[weiyuheng]

someone made a song about That One Staircase that's in every guzhuang drama ever so i translated it LOL

it's very rushed and i haven't watched all of these shows so idk how the official subs translated certain place names but i did my best

all errors are mine <3

source

[herpsandbirds]

Chong'an Moustache Toad (Leptobrachium liui), family Megophryidae, endemic to southern China

Males develop a row of spines on the upper lip, during the courtship and mating season, which resemble a mustache.

photograph by Koh Ke Han

[oatmealstreetfighter]

Society is afraid to tell you that the invaluable benefit of having fat-ass legs is that when a Yellowjacket crawls up your pants leg and stings you on the thigh repeatedly it's actually completely fine

[389]

[oatmealstreetfighter]

Browsing webnovels the other day and this was in the description of one of them, was losing my mind over it

[leidensygdom]

me of late

[i-will-write]

man if I gotta write bad fics, it should at least be easy! But it’s not! It is also hard to write this bad fic

[oatmealstreetfighter]

Finished the last book in the Wind on Fire trilogy, it was okay

It kind of feels like both of the fiesty outspoken female characters were largely defanged to be made more palatable after the very first book but I am glad that Kestrel got her moment to be the Big Damn Hero. Personally I think they should've gotten progressively more feral and annoying as the series went on

If the second book was "Wait, is this the Bible?" this one left no question as to the biblical inspiration, it became very obvious. Because of that it was pretty hard for all the Homeland stuff to not leave a bad taste in the mouth considering Real World Current and Historical Events

On the Bible note, the Bible can get away with not having to justify or explain a lot of things within the narrative of its text because it is a religious text and they usually get those privileges. Narrative adventures usually DO have to give us at least some reason why only one group of people gets to live in a paradise while the rest of the continent gets spiritually nuked and when said people have almost no emotional acknowledgement that they are the happy survivors of a continent that underwent an apocalypse it DOES feel strange and disconcerting and unfair

Mixed feelings on Kestrel being implied both low-empathy and aroace. On one hand, yay for a relatable character and especially yay to see these traits in a female lead. Her as a fifteen year old wondering if her lack of empathy and lack of romantic interest makes her a terrible broken person who will never be happy is also very real. On the other hand......I kind of feel like the book never proves her wrong? Like it kind of feels like the real reason she got to do the cool big sacrifice was more because the author couldn't imagine a happily-ever-after for a woman who wasn't warm and nurturing and who didn't really want to ever get married or have kids or be part of a community so she just had to die in a blaze of glory instead lol

I know they set the typical age of marriage as 15 in this book but WOW some of the age gap relationships were still pretty rough. When the girls get kidnapped to be forced into marriage, it's treated as especially heinous that one of the girls is as young as she is and they still take her (I don't remember the exact age but younger than 13). But then later in the book when they've been rescued it's revealed one of the group who has already been widowed and had children has a romantic interest in her and that they WILL be married in the future (foretold by prophecy) and this is apparently both good and romantic

William Nicholson REALLY didn't know what to do with Mumpo so he just became Hot and I find that funny. Pinto getting him at the end felt less romantic and more like when the action hero gets the hot girl as his reward for surviving the movie

The sibling relationship never got more normal or more comfortable to read about but I just have to accept that in this case being twins means that they're literally one soul in two bodies or something

I made a joke earlier in the book that maybe Sisi would marry both siblings because she loves them so much and they love each other so much and it tickled me that it ended up kinda being true because of the aforementioned soul thing

My base rating for this final book was a solid 5/10 but I simply must dock it an additional two full points because the author was so incredibly annoying about fat people. It literally became a major plot point. It was more annoying because you could tell he thought he was being quite nuanced and progressive and empathetic about the whole thing