mixed bag of funny, angsty, angry, and just plain weird
"Am I dead? Please say yes."
"One more word and I'll leave."
"I don't think we can salvage this."
"If you were really sorry, you'd change."
"Don't tell me what I'm allowed to feelโฆ"
"Don't act like you know what's going on."
"No. Get out of here. I don't want to see you."
"You snore so loud, I can't hear myself think."
"Who ever gave you the right to act this way?"
"They weren't supposed to tell you where I am."
"It's called empathy. Maybe you should learn it."
"I know I'm bad at this; you don't have to rub it in."
"Yes, I hear you. All the dramatics. It's hard not to."
"Why are you shrinking yourself for everyone else?"
"Yeah, let's see how YOU like cold feet on your back!"
"No. No, tell me what you actually think. I want to know."
"Just tell me how to help. I want to, I just don't know how."
"I'm gonna need you to take all that sass and go over there."
"You don't have to prove anything to me, you know that, right?"
"How long have you been carrying all those secrets on your own?"
"Let me just ask the spirits of the dead, firstโฆ The spirits said 'no'."
"Nothing you do will ever be good enough for them, so stop trying."
"Has anyone ever told you that your vibe is strange and off-putting?"
"I wanted to slam the door really dramatically, but the hinge caught."
"Everyone should be a lot more appreciative of me not going apeshit."
"Every time I see you, I get cute aggression, I can't help it. I must squish."
"This would be a lot more soothing without the underlying, constant terror."
"It's hard to believe your parents loved you if they gave you a name like that."
"If I looked into your brain, I think I'd just hear the Benny Hill theme on repeat."
"I knew this wasn't gonna work. Doesn't make it any less disappointing, though."
"Does this task require a bra/pants? Because, if it does, I will not be participating."
"I heard your stomach rumble from over here. No argument, I'm getting you food."
"Gonna need you to take a deep breath, find whatever inner peace you have, and be quiet."
"You'd have nothing to worry about in a zombie apocalypseโฆ I mean, they eat brains, right?"
"I knew you weren't good for much, yet you continue to find new ways to disappoint me."
"Yeah, you jumpscared me! You move so quietly, it's like perpetually living in an indie horror game!"
"I can't lower my bar of expectations any more. The devil is already using it for limbo parties in hell."
"You're an amazing scientific study waiting to happen on how someone can survive so long without any common sense at all."
"I really don't care what you think or say about me. But, I draw the line at you disrespecting them... you're on really thin ice here."
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