oddsmkr

just a random teen venting out their feelings because they have no one else to tell. (intj 5w6 531 sp/sx)

[oddsmkr]

this is a vent account, so i'd like to stay anonymous.

[oddsmkr]

time flies quickly. im going to graduate soon, and i'm struggling to find an accomodation in singapore sigh

also!! i have a boyfriend now <33

[oshidorifuufu]

*showing visible symptoms* oh my god i need help desperately

*symptoms go away for one day* what if im just faking it

[oddsmkr]

Everything fell apart when I realised how far behind everyone I am. I'm not able to dream big because I live in an environment where big dreams are to be brought to your grave, not lived.

[oddsmkr]

god forbid me from getting proper education in an economy where the education is shit hence, the average IQ here is so low that not even the adults can think properly.

[oddsmkr]

i hate romance. i'm never good at feelings anyway, yet I crave to feel them. but once I do feel and experience them, I get overwhelmed and back away like I was never meant to feel them.

[oddsmkr]

i miss having online friends i could talk to everyday

[oddsmkr]

chasing my dreams is a suicide mission because I have unrealistic standards I set for myself because I see everyone around me as someone to compete against. i have a terrible mentality where I HAVE to be better than this other person because if I am not the best, then I've failed in that particular subject or talent because my efforts have gone to waste.

[oddsmkr]

i'm literally living like i'm going to die tomorrow.

i'm studying everything all at once, doing everything all at once, etc., to the point my head hurts and I get multiple migraines that could last for days and feel dizzy for the whole day like I'm going to faint

[oddsmkr]

honestly, he's such an awesome teacher. i don't know what I would do if I hadn't met him.

[oddsmkr]

i wanna kms fr

[oddsmkr]

people keep saying i have anger issues but when its not about my anger issues they'd still bring it up like LEAVE ME ALONEEEE that's not my only personality good lord. 😭😭😭

[oddsmkr]

im so burnt out that im not bothered to put up with the stupid shit these people do

[oddsmkr]

ever since i moved countries to move schools, my mental health has gotten worse and I finally got therapy. I'm diagnosed with depression and really bad anxiety. my mental health is so bad that I also have somatic symptom disorder.

the people in this country are stupid as hell, I'm genuinely so surprised how can people be this stupid?? they litter everywhere, have no respect, and cheat on the simplest assignments???

and theyre all so hypocritical and so thirsty for guys. i mean, sure, I understand because we're not allowed to meet guys here but DAMNNN cheating on each other is so common, porn is the norm, and desperately trying to get guys' attention is so??? idk, they all act like pick-mes

[oddsmkr]

is it that hard to not hate on other's interests and not make them feel like shit for something that's not problematic?

[oddsmkr]

a change

so much changed over the years, honestly. i used to fear love because of my experiences, and haven't been able to fall in love for a long time.

now i have someone to love.

[oddsmkr]

never have i ever felt so shitty to the point i'm crying every single day