"God there must be something wrong with me, for things to go this badly this often? What's the saying, once is unlucky, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern? I think it's time to give up on romance, maybe I'm just unlovable" the words come out with more bitterness than intended, a little more belief in their truth than anyone had realized, curled away from the world where no one could judge the words being spoken
"Well that can't be it" came the response, unbidden and immediate, reflexive, as natural as breathing "I'd have fallen in love with you almost a dozen times if I let myself"
A pause then, not out of an unsureness in the words, but out of shock that they'd been let loose, at how natural it was to voice the feelings that had been stirring for almost a decade, at how easy it was to confess a secret that had stayed buried for so long and never should have come to light
And a look, a glance even, with more weight than before as the truth of the statement rang through the air
"You don't mean that" a beat, a voice uncomprehending of the depth of all that laid before it "You can't"
"I do"
"But then- Why wouldn't you have-"
"You needed a friend, not a partner, and besides, we've talked about how it would never work between us, I wasn't going to jeopardize another one of your friendships by pushing myself into a position that's only ever hurt you in the end"
An open jaw, in shock and disbelief, an expression conveying a lack of understanding but a gaze that knew all too well what had happened
"The point is, you're not unlovable," a response cut off with a sip of a drink, preventing more words from being spoken that could not be unsaid "That much at least, I know is true"