Confessions of a Closet Party Girl
There are obvious advantages to being part of a family who enjoyed drinking liquor as if it was water that gives life. My family had this strong belief that we should always learn to drink at home. It felt as if I started to learn to drink as early as I started to learn what the Solar System is. My mom believed that it was a good thing to learn your drinking limits at home where your safety will surely be not compromised than with your friends where there are always doubts on who might have ulterior motives when drinking with you.
Though I was subjected to typical teenage rules, I think that this tradition of drinking in the family has allowed me to gain more freedom than others of the same age as me. I was allowed to drink out with friends starting in college. Though I did have some drinking sessions back in high school, they weren't known by my mom. Or at least, I thought she didn't notice it back then. Fearing the loss of my drinking freedom, I forced my self to be sober everytime I would go out and drink secretly. I think this helped me take control of my drinking habits. I was even cautious of what I looked like and smelled like everytime I drank in secret. There were times that I would scold my drinking buddies for smoking and for pouring accidentally spilling liquor on me and my clothes. There were days that I think my mom was so close to finding me out. Whether or not she knows, I never got scolded for it... which was a good thing, I guess. I wanted to keep her trust. Maybe she wanted to show me she trusts me more.
The first time I got drunk was when I was a kid... say 7-10 years old? My mom and my brother said that I was a happy drunk. I just laughed and watched a movie with them until I fell asleep on our sofa.
The first time I vomited was also when I was drinking at home. I just stood up from our table in the street, went to our doorstep, emptied my stomach to the nearby hole, went inside our house, then crashed on our sofa.
I became a strong drinker among my friends. Why? I knew my limits. I knew my pace. That's why I could never get drunk when I'm out with my friends... if I didn't really want to.
Study hard. Party harder.
The stress of being a UP student is unimaginable. Being in UP also reminds you of how great freedom feels like. You can choose to study hard. And you can also choose to party hard.
I may not be one that can be considered as a legit party girl who everyone knows is always present at a party (and always gets drunk) and only has skirts for their bottom wardrobe. I'm more of a closet party girl. I dress in jeans, shirt, sneakers. I sometimes look jologs, I admit. But I do know how to dress up, clean up, and step it up when there's such an occasion such as a party.
I started attending debut parties (with drinks at the end of the program, of course). Then to debut afterparties. Then to legit parties... college parties.
Unknowingly, I became a closet party girl. Always covered in schoolworks and orgworks, but always in the know of college parties that I can attend. It isn't easy to become a closet party girl. After all, protecting your image is key to becoming a closet party girl.
People can know that you occassionally drink and go to parties. But you can never do something bold and scandalous that would make you the talk of the town, or make you the girl to remember at a party.
I've seen and experienced a lot of wild things at some of the parties and afterparties I went to. There are things that I would probably regret (and currently regretting right now). And there are things which I would just laugh out in the near future. It's nice to know things and to experience stuff. But you always need to know your boundaries. I don't really know how to coherently say all these things so I'll just make a list.
To all the closet party girls out there (like me!), here are the 10 things you need to remember and remind yourself before and after you go to a party. I'm making this list to remind others and my self of the things I can, can't, should, shouldn't do AS A CLOSET PARTY GIRL.
1. Don't just give away your real name.
Stalking is so easy nowadays. When someone asks for your name, give them a nickname. It doesn't have to be super far from your real name, just enough to make you not readily searchable on your social media accounts. You'll never know when you come across someone with a lot of common friends with you. Sometimes, a single letter can make the difference. I'm so glad I gave away my nickname at this certain party I went to. It was one letter away from my real first name but it still made me invisible to those guys I met. (They were nice, but meh. That was a party, you know.)
2. Don't just give away your (real) number.
It's both flattering and shocking when someone asks for your number. Believe me, I know this shit. But it would really be a lot better if you don't give away your real number. Or have a number that you rarely use. Or better yet, have a number that is solely for giving away to stupid things such as registration booths for freebies, and boys you meet at a party. HAHAHA. But really, you can never be too careful. It's nice to keep in touch with that cute guy you met and talked to for the whole night, but it would just give you a lot of disappointments to know that the things you talked about at that party are the only things he know and is willing to talk about to you, a fellow being he just met at a party.
3. Don't let any guy touch you anywhere without your permission.
Self-respect 101. Make your boundaries and STRICTLY enforce them. It's alright to go out of your bubble sometimes... just remember not to do anything you would probably cry about the next day (or for forever), alright? You're an adult and you have your own free will. Be open and liberal but don't be trashy, that's all.
4. Smile and stay friendly.
It's a party! So be friendly even though you're really antisocial and hates spaces with too many people (=> 2 people per 1 square meter). I suggest you drink up so you can loosen up. Parties are a great way to release stress and to socialize. Don't be such a stock-up bitch who glares at everyone. Be the mysterious and gorgeous girl everyone would want to dance with.
5. Don't go to the ladies' room unaccompanied by a trusted lady friend.
Especially if it isn't a well-guarded place. You wouldn't want to be accosted at the girls' room for a kiss and make-out session, would you? And worse, get locked in a cubicle with just the two of you! That's a tough position to be in and honestly, it's one of the scariest thing you'll ever experience. It's funny in a way, but that's if you're wise enough to outsmart a guy with a motive. Just trust me on this.
6. Don't hope for and encourage a relationship with a guy you just met at a party.
JUST NO. NEVER. JUST DON'T PLEASE. You can hope that you guys met for a reason and that you might be each other's tamers. BUT PLEASE. Most guys you meet at a party just wants to score. There is a 1/10000 chance of finding a quality man at a bar or at a party. These are hypothetical figures, but please just be logical and rational. A guy you meet at a bar or at a party is one that isn't really nice to introduce to family and friends. You can try. But it would be better to avoid that big pile of disappointments you’re about to face. Yes there are what ifs, but again, just trust me on this.
7. Don't drive when going to a party.
Because this means you have to drive going home, too. Which would either end in 2 ways: you drunk/tipsy driving or you not drinking at all. What a waste of time, right? For all strong and independent women out there who drives their own cars, just don't do it when going to a party. And don't give a ride to anyone you met at a party! They shall be the death of you. HAHAHA
8. Drink at your own pace.
Because everyone else is either drunk/tipsy, they won't notice if you don't sip your drink as frequently as they do or if you don't finish bottles as fast as they do. So it wouldn't matter if you're there to enjoy the DJs, the crowd, or the sight of having your friend/s totally drunk. You can drink at your own pace. But you should remember, it's basic party courtesy to drink up when your group gets a "Cheers!" going on. Even though you just drank a shot, you effing drink up after "Cheers!"
9. Go for the guy with the looks you like best.
Do not settle for the friend they toss at you. Go for the cutest looking / most handsome guy to you. They won't even remember (to text/call) you the next day so where's the harm in putting up a little effort to actually get the guy of your (party) dreams? Though it would be a great bonus if you actually end up having a great conversation and a great kiss to end your night ;)
Being a little tipsy, you look up and reach for the sky and all you see are flashing lights and scattering confetti while the DJ plays an awesome soundtrack to accompany that perfect moment. This moment is where we closet party girls live. We enjoy the fact that we have other serious priorities in life, but we get to enjoy this perfect moment at every party we go to. BEST FEELING EVER.
What happens at a party, stays and ends at that party. Once you get home, you shove it in the deepest part of your closet (or mind) and you just pull it back up when going out again. Party hard, fellow closet party girl! ;)